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Default Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-26-2007, 01:27 AM

Brothers and sisters, as you all know from my regular Sunday sermons, I am always advising that parents get their children involved with firearms at the earliest possible age. When I was a boy, I was able to breakdown, clean and reaasemble every weapon in my father's arsenal blindfolded. Why even a girl can do that much (and it will be good practice for when the time comes that she needs to clean her husband's weapon!)

Well today I want to draw your attention to THIS Godly young fellow. He seems quite proud of himself for shooting a pig, but the point is, his father was wise enough to provide the tyke with proper weapons at a young age.

Quote:
Boy bags hog said bigger than 'Hogzilla'

MONTGOMERY, Ala. - Hogzilla is being made into a horror movie. But the sequel may be even bigger: Meet Monster Pig. An 11-year-old boy used a pistol to kill a wild hog his father says weighed a staggering 1,051 pounds and measured 9 feet 4, from the tip of its snout to the base of its tail. Think hams as big as car tires.

If the claims are accurate, Jamison Stone's trophy boar would be bigger than Hogzilla, the famed wild hog that grew to seemingly mythical proportions after being killed in south Georgia in 2004.

Hogzilla originally was thought to weigh 1,000 pounds and measure 12 feet long. National Geographic experts who unearthed its remains believe the animal actually weighed about 800 pounds and was 8 feet long.

Jamison, who killed his first deer at age 5, was hunting with father Mike Stone and two guides in east Alabama on May 3 when he bagged Monster Pig. He said he shot the huge animal eight times with a .50-caliber revolver and chased it for three hours through hilly woods before finishing it off with a point-blank shot.

Through it all, there was the fear that the animal would turn and charge them, as wild boars have a reputation for doing.

"I was a little bit scared, a little bit excited," said Jamison, who lives in Pickensville on the Mississippi border. He just finished the sixth grade on the honor roll at Christian Heritage Academy, a small, private school.

With the animal finally dead in a creek bed on the 2,500-acre Lost Creek Plantation, a commercial hunting preserve in Delta, trees had to be cut down and a backhoe brought in to bring Jamison's prize out of the woods.

It was hauled on a truck to the Clay County Farmers Exchange in Lineville, where Jeff Kinder said they used his scale, recently calibrated, to weigh the hog.

Kinder's scale measures only to the nearest 10, but Mike Stone said it balanced one notch past the 1,050-pound mark.

"It probably weighed 1,060 pounds. We were just afraid to change it once the story was out," he said.

The hog's head is being mounted by Jerry Cunningham of Jerry's Taxidermy. Cunningham said the animal measured 54 inches around the head, 74 inches around the shoulders and 11 inches from the eyes to the end of its snout.

"It's huge," he said. "It's just the biggest thing I've ever seen."

Mike Stone is having sausage made from the rest of the animal. "We'll probably get 500 to 700 pounds," he said.
God Bless America, and God Bless the NRA!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-26-2007, 11:06 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Brothers and sisters, as you all know from my regular Sunday sermons, I am always advising that parents get their children involved with firearms at the earliest possible age. When I was a boy, I was able to breakdown, clean and reaasemble every weapon in my father's arsenal blindfolded. Why even a girl can do that much (and it will be good practice for when the time comes that she needs to clean her husband's weapon!)

Well today I want to draw your attention to THIS Godly young fellow. He seems quite proud of himself for shooting a pig, but the point is, his father was wise enough to provide the tyke with proper weapons at a young age.
Praise! I wonder what they'll do with the head after it's been stuffed. Since they're good Christian folks, I have no doubt it'll end up being thrown through a mosque window at some point.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-26-2007, 03:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Well today I want to draw your attention to THIS Godly young fellow. He seems quite proud of himself for shooting a pig, but the point is, his father was wise enough to provide the tyke with proper weapons at a young age.
God Bless America, and God Bless the NRA!
Pastor Zeke, what an inspiring story. I wonder if that boy might decide to track down a different kind of hog someday?


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Last edited by Elmer Christianson; 05-26-2007 at 03:40 PM. Reason: Christians aren't perfect...
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-26-2007, 08:01 PM

Oh glory to God, I could feed my husband, Mr. Whitford, for a good two months on that creature!
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-27-2007, 10:14 PM

Wow. I once **** a ***** about a **** that was 2 ******* ****. Now this? Man, this is some ******** ******** ********

Last edited by Brother Temperance; 05-27-2007 at 11:20 PM. Reason: Expletives deleted
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 12:53 AM

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Wow. I once **** a ***** about a **** that was 2 ******* ****. Now this? Man, this is some ******** ******** ********
So... much... cursing... X.x
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 01:34 AM

But it wasn't cursing. I said that I read a story about a bear that was 2 stories tall, Now this? It's like Princess Mononoke bs.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 06:31 AM

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Originally Posted by Sailor Chaos View Post
But it wasn't cursing. I said that I read a story about a bear that was 2 stories tall, Now this? It's like Princess Mononoke bs.
Ah. The fundies here, bleeped everything out, so I assumed the worst.. And you're right. It is. Why did they bleep everything?
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 04:19 PM

I have no idea Hii-chan. No idea
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 04:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sailor Chaos View Post
But it wasn't cursing. I said that I read a story about a bear that was 2 stories tall, Now this? It's like Princess Mononoke bs.
Friend, you should be thanking me. Your original post consisted of some tedious personal detail that only your friends (assuming you have any) or immediate family could find interesting in the slightest, and then a reference to a children's cartoon. In other words, exactly the same as all your other posts, except for the obscenity that moved me to edit it. Anyone reading it would have to conclude that you are a tiresome, self-obsessed little girl who spends too much time watching cartoons. The new version of the post is a great improvement: it has that rarest and most precious of qualities, mystique. If the Oulipo weren't too busy being tortured eternally by Satan for being pretentious faggots who hate America and love Osama Bin Laden, I'm sure they'd be congratulating you on it. From a boring one-liner, it has become something far more precious: an embodiment of the void, a sort of inkblot, where any observer can project anything you want. In its revised form, your post has near-infinte potential. Now say "thank you, Brother Temperance, sir", and get back to reading the Bible.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-28-2007, 05:17 PM

First off, I'm not a little girl, Secondly, PM is not a kid's cartoon. WAAY to bloody, and anyone who's watched it would know the connection. Besides, whe have I talked about children's cartoons? And my one-liners are witty.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 12:35 AM

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Originally Posted by Sailor Chaos View Post
And my one-liners are witless.
Yes. Yes they are.


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1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 01:32 AM

:p Meanie. But criticisms are needed to improve, so thank you. I will work harder to be less not funny.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 02:29 AM

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:p Meanie. But criticisms are needed to improve, so thank you. I will work harder to be less not funny.
The fundies here have a very warped sense of humor.
Your one liner are very witty.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 02:54 AM

Why, thank you Hii.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 03:12 AM

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Why, thank you Hii.
Teehee, always here to drop a compliment.

Well back on topic, that is one huge pig! Why can't we have pigs like that here! All we have is Mountain Lions...
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 03:18 AM

And the Michigan Rhinoceros.
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 06:40 AM

This is why you should arm your kids! Imagine your kid was out playing and this came around the corner!
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,275954,00.html
Quote:
CASSELBERRY, Fla. — Police say they're sure they shot a four-foot-long, 80-pound monitor lizard that had been lurking in an Orlando suburb for months. Still, neighbors aren't ready to let their children or pets back outside until they see a carcass.
The lizard didn't bite anyone, but police officers were authorized to kill it because of the potential danger it posed to small children and animals.
An officer shot the reptile twice Sunday but wasn't close enough to catch it before the animal scampered into a retention pond, said Lt. Dennis Stewart of the Casselberry Police Department.
"If they did shoot it, I'm sure it's going to be angry if it comes out now," said Ilene Gothelf, whose home borders the pond about 10 miles from Orlando. "I want to know that it is safe for the kids to come out."
Authorities said the lizard was likely a pet that escaped or was illegally dumped. For months, it eluded wildlife officials and trappers. At one point, fans of a local morning radio program mistakenly believed there was a reward for its scales.
The Casselberry lizard was less beloved than an alligator that eluded capture for two years in Los Angeles. The gator, a media darling named "Reggie," was finally wrestled into captivity Thursday and taken to the Los Angeles Zoo.



Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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WilliamJenningsBryan WilliamJenningsBryan is offline
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 07:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sailor Chaos View Post
First off, I'm not a little girl, Secondly, PM is not a kid's cartoon. WAAY to bloody, and anyone who's watched it would know the connection. Besides, whe have I talked about children's cartoons? And my one-liners are witty.
So that is how you derive your philosophy of life - by watching cartoons? Have you ever contemplated eternity?

You and the rest of your hypersocial "texting" little friends seem to be incapable of having any substantive or illuminating conversations. Perhaps that is why you all have to go to college these days, just to get a high school education. Just dropping in to say "Hi" does not cut it with the Lord, son. What are you doing here anyway, just hanging out with the Baptists to pass the time until Jesus kills you?


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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Default Re: Good Christian Boy Shoots Pig - 05-29-2007, 11:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Hikari View Post
Teehee, always here to drop a compliment.

Well back on topic, that is one huge pig! Why can't we have pigs like that here! All we have is Mountain Lions...
...and rabid gooks.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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