General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
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True Christian
True Christian
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Posts: 6,311
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Godless New York City
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Happy Jewish New Year! -
09-25-2022, 05:00 AM
As the Jewish High Holidays begin tomorrow evening, all of us at the Landover Baptist Church wish to extend our very best wishes to the many Jews who read and contribute to our fora, not to mention the hundreds of Jews employed in the Church accounting and legal departments.
As this is the traditional season in which Jews repent their sins, we'd like to encourage all of you to apologize for killing Jesus, accept him as your Lord and Savior, stop eating Christian babies, disable the Israeli laser network in space, and move to Israel where God says you all belong.
L'shana Tova!
Donald Trump / Kanye West
2024
I'm with the genius and the jigaboo.
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Is a good, decent True Christian lady
True Christian
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Posts: 10,470
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
09-25-2022, 10:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow
As this is the traditional season in which Jews repent their sins, we'd like to encourage all of you to apologize for killing Jesus, accept him as your Lord and Savior, stop eating Christian babies, disable the Israeli laser network in space, and move to Israel where God says you all belong.
L'shana Tova!
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It's the least that they could do to hurry along Jesus' return. (As well as improve property values in a number of neighborhoods.)
His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the Economy.gif)
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True Christian Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,668
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
09-25-2022, 04:04 PM
Hebs are funny with their curls and bald women.
Ever notice that they have to be first in line for a New Year?
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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True Christian
True Christian
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Posts: 6,311
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Godless New York City
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
09-26-2022, 05:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins
Ever notice that they have to be first in line for a New Year?
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It's like how the Armenians celebrate Christmas two weeks late to take advantage of the after-Christmas sales. You'd think Jesus would be more important to them than a few drachmas (or whatever worthless money they have in Armenia), but then again they don't have the benefit of the Landover Baptist Church to guide them.
Do you know how copper wire was invented? A Jew and an Armenian saw a penny at the same time.
Donald Trump / Kanye West
2024
I'm with the genius and the jigaboo.
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Mayor of Freehold
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Posts: 11,007
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
09-26-2022, 02:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow
It's like how the Armenians celebrate Christmas two weeks late to take advantage of the after-Christmas sales.
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It is peculiar how the Jews got so mixed up about the calendar. They go to church on Saturday are way off the mark on New Year. Those running department stores know the date for Christmas. Their lives would be so much better if they would just admit they killed Jesus, ask for forgiveness and become Baptists.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 1
Join Date: Dec 2022
Location: Finland
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Telegram @ZENNOBOSS ICQ 1643164 КИДАЛА И МОШЕННИК. -
12-05-2022, 01:51 AM
Telegram @ZENNOBOSS ICQ 1643164 š˜”А›А ˜ œžШ•НН˜š.
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Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian
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Posts: 2,589
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Owning the Libs
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Perish Judah -
12-05-2022, 02:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by VictorCoaps
Telegram @ZENNOBOSS ICQ 1643164 КИДАЛА И МОШЕННИК.
[I'm not reposting your filthy link]
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Yeah, I'm sure you'll have plenty of time to watch granny porn when you get drafted into the godless Finland Army to resist the upcoming Russian liberation of your vile country. Boy, you need Jesus. Won't you pray with me?
Based and Christpilled 
Titus 1:10-16 "For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake ... Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith; Not giving heed to Jewish fables, and commandments of men, that turn from the truth ... Unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled. They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate."
The Goyim know. We know who killed Jesus (John 5:16, John 18:39-40, Matthew 27:25)
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Posts: 14,193
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
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Re: Perish Judah -
12-05-2022, 03:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes
...granny porn...
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Well, he's still trolling Yahoo Messenger for skank. Who else could be left there?
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Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian
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Posts: 2,589
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Owning the Libs
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Re: Perish Judah -
12-05-2022, 04:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much
Well, he's still trolling Yahoo Messenger for skank. Who else could be left there?
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You'd probably have to ask Jeeves to answer that one.
Based and Christpilled 
Titus 1:10-16 "For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision: Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake ... Wherefore rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith; Not giving heed to Jewish fables, and commandments of men, that turn from the truth ... Unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled. They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate."
The Goyim know. We know who killed Jesus (John 5:16, John 18:39-40, Matthew 27:25)
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 2
Join Date: Dec 2022
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
12-05-2022, 08:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
It is peculiar how the Jews got so mixed up about the calendar. They go to church on Saturday are way off the mark on New Year. Those running department stores know the date for Christmas. Their lives would be so much better if they would just admit they killed Jesus, ask for forgiveness and become Baptists.
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Shana tovah u’metukah 
Last edited by Pastor Rune Enoe; 03-24-2023 at 02:28 PM.
Reason: Link removed
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An old soul
True Christian
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Posts: 4,493
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: USA-UK-France (traveling)
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Re: Happy Jewish New Year! -
12-05-2022, 08:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by weightjuice
Shana tovah u’metukah  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by VictorCoaps
Telegram @ZENNOBOSS ICQ 1643164 š˜”А›А ˜ œžШ•НН˜š.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow
L'shana Tova!
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In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I now bring the fullness of his cross, death, blood, and sacrifice, his resurrection, life, and empty tomb, his authority, rule, and dominion; I bring judgment from the throne of Jesus Christ against every foul power, witchcraft, black art, and curse. I bring Jesus Christ cursed against all curses—written, spoken, unspoken, or transferred.
Jesus, I ask you to send your angels now to completely disarm all curses and black arts; disarm their every device and render them destroyed. I ask your angels to remove all foul spirits involved in these curses and black arts and bind them to your feet for judgment. I now claim every spiritual blessing that my Heavenly Father has given to me in Christ Jesus (Ephesians 1:3). I claim those blessings right here in the very place of cursing, by the authority and power of the Lord Jesus Christ, and in his name.
All of this I pray by the authority and in the mighty name of the Lord Jesus Christ of Nazareth, who came in the flesh, you are NOT the Father.
If I have seen further, it is by standing on the heads of others.
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