Landover Baptist Lounge Relax, Kick your shoes off. Praise Jesus!!! (Blacks and Homosexuals strictly prohibited!) |
 |
Unsaved trash, revolting papist dog
|
|
Posts: 26
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New York City
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 12:32 AM
I wrote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi
Here is one the Pope told me:
How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon?
1004.
4 in the seats and 1000 in the ashtray.
|
Then this Enoch fellow writes:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Enoch
How many joos can you fit in a Volkswagen?
2 in the front, 3 in the back, 6 million in the ashtray! 
|
Then YOU say:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titus Templeton
Very good one, Brother Enoch!
|
I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
Peace Be With You,
Cardinal (Ret.) Dario Fungi
|
 |
Linguistics and Translation Consultant
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,192
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: LBC Language Lab
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 12:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi
I wrote:
.
I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
|
You're surely not serious...?? You're just yidding...right?
|
 |
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,074
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: On my way to Heaven!
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 01:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by David Rothstein
Why can't Jesus eat M&M's?
They keep falling through his hands.

|
How is this related to the Holocau$t?
What's the similarity between a joo and a tire?
They both scream when you hit full gas.
"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
John 8:32
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 01:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cardinal Dario Fungi
I wrote:
Then this Enoch fellow writes:
Then YOU say:
I may be old and the Lord may have taken away my bladder control, but I will not let that man jew me out of my joke!
|
I have better delivery than you. Plus I know how to spell Volkswagen.
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 02:29 AM
I am not sure we should be doing this at all. I mean aren't we just helping the Joos and their lies about Hitler and Germany? I am most likely wrong.
|
 |
Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 02:34 AM
I think it's probably fine.
Q: What do you call the person responsible for the Holocaust?
A: A dirty Jew.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,216
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: West of Eden
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 02:50 AM
Found these on the internet thingy:
My history teacher once asked me if I knew what the holocaust was.
Hilarious, was apparently not the correct answer.
I recently went to Auschwitz and it was one of the most depressing experiences of my life.
No gift shop
What’s grey, runs along walls and kills Jews?
Gas Pipes.
Three Jews walk into a sauna.
Gullible cun+s
My boss (who is German) had the audacity to tell me there is no ‘I’ in ‘team’.
However, he got quite upset when I casually pointed out that there is a ‘U’ in ‘holocaust’…
Holocaust, the Musical. Putting the ‘sing’ back into ethnic cleansing.
Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are un Godly among them of all their un Godly deeds which they have un Godly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which un Godly sinners have spoken against him.
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 03:14 AM
On a more serious note, I heard World War II and the holocaust were actually planned and instigated by Zionists to lead to the formation of Israel when Germany was defeated. They sacrificed 6 million of their own, and 60 million from other nations (mostly Christians, except for the japs) to bring about the birth (rebirth) of Israel. Anyone have any more on this?
|
 |
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
|
|
Posts: 79,906
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 03:30 AM
Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,216
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: West of Eden
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 03:41 AM
Found 1 more I like:
Why don't Jews eat pussy?
Their noses get in the way.
(yeah, not holcausty enough, hire a jew lawyer and sue me)
Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are un Godly among them of all their un Godly deeds which they have un Godly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which un Godly sinners have spoken against him.
|
 |
Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team The Most Honest Lawyer in America
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,471
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: God's Good Side!
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 03:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.

|
I see what jew did there.
I think most people will nazi it your way, though.
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 37
Join Date: Jun 2010
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 07:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.

|
Indeed, they are certainly out of mein kampf-ortzone
|
 |
Unsaved trash
|
|
Posts: 621
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: In the sweet Love of God who is Elohim.
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 07:27 AM
What do you call 6 million dead Jews? The Holocaust.
What do you call 12 million dead or displaced Palestinians? A nation's right to defend itself.
Yours in killing the funny,
Sam
Proverbs 25:21-22 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:
For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee.
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 07:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel Coleridge
What do you call 6 million dead Jews? The Holocaust.
What do you call 12 million dead or displaced Palestinians?
|
Trespassers
Quote:
Yours in killing the funny,
Sam
|
Enoch
Yours in bringing back the funny.
(Funny because it's true...)
|
Fourm Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 9,266
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: On my way to Paradise
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 08:04 AM
|
 |
True Christian™ Televangelist Director of Fundraising and Tithing On the Look Out for Wife #6!
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 8,727
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 08:19 AM
What is a Jew's biggest dilemma?
Free Pork.
How do you make a telephone wire.
Let two Jews fight over a penny.
Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 08:52 AM
What's the goal of a jewish football game?
To get the quarter back.
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 08:55 AM
Did you hear about the new Jewish car?
Stops on a dime. And picks it up.
|
 |
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 08:59 AM
Two jews meet on the street. The first jew says 'so sorry to hear about that fire that burned down your store last Thursday.' The second jew says 'no, no that's next Thursday."
|
 |
Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade Jesus macht frei
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 5,914
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Black Forrest, Germany
|
|
Re: Holocaust Jokes -
01-06-2011, 03:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by David Rothstein
What's the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
|
Have you no shame?
You're people killed Jesus Christ and now you make fun of him.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2023, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|