Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Landover Today! > The Thrifty Christian
Reload this Page Condo for Rent
The Thrifty Christian Business, Investing and Finance Tips for True Christians™

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Smile Condo for Rent - 03-21-2017, 02:24 PM

$2400/month plus first and last month's rent to move in:


777 Leviticus Landing, Unit 7
This sparkling 2 bedroom unit features the latest in sanctified living in a guarded, True Christian only community.
Over 3000 sq ft of living space plus balcony and large patio will help to make this beautiful condo your peaceful paradise until Jesus comes to whisk you away to your mansion in Glory!
Chef's quality appliances in the kitchen and a beautiful laundry room with steam washer and energy efficient dryer.
Includes one covered parking space for guests and a 2 car garage for the tenant.
Formerly the home of my parents, who have returned to New Jersey to live out their days among old friends, this home has been kept in immaculate condition by reputable help.
Note: Maid is NOT included.
Immediate Occupancy. Credit check required.



1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-21-2017, 05:39 PM

Oh, how I would love to be able to re-locate to Freehold and live in such a lovely home!

Unfortunately, my disability check is not that much to begin with. And I give 65% of my income to the Lord. I certainly would not feel right about cutting back on that. I only hope and pray that I am not being selfish in keeping the other 35% to live on.


Just last week, I had a handful of food and many glasses of name-brand soda pop. And I have several cups of tea every day with real milk. Are there any Thrifty Christian tips to help me cut back so that I can be a better servant to the Lord?


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
MitzaLizalor's Avatar
MitzaLizalor MitzaLizalor is offline
Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Heaven Bound Mission to Australia Christian Love Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth TC Bravery The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady Pro-Life True Scientist™ True Christian™ True Christian Artist True Christian Beauty Most Obedient Batman Shooting Survivor Kangi Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Early riser Nuts for JESUS! Touched by Jesus Color wheel Trumpette Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Stamp of Approval Tagging for Jesus In Love With Zeke BFF of Jesus God's chosen ones Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Grammar Nazi GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Aardvark

 
Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-21-2017, 11:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
$2400/month plus first and last month's rent to move in:


777 Leviticus Landing, Unit 7
This sparkling 2 bedroom unit features the latest in sanctified living in a guarded, True Christian only community.
Over 3000 sq ft of living space plus balcony and large patio will help to make this beautiful condo your peaceful paradise until Jesus comes to whisk you away to your mansion in Glory!
Chef's quality appliances in the kitchen and a beautiful laundry room with steam washer and energy efficient dryer.
Includes one covered parking space for guests and a 2 car garage for the tenant.
Formerly the home of my parents, who have returned to New Jersey to live out their days among old friends, this home has been kept in immaculate condition by reputable help.
Note: Maid is NOT included.
Immediate Occupancy. Credit check required.

What view do you get from the balcony I mean which way does it face. I'd prefer not west facing. Is short term available?

It seems a reasonable size, but sometimes the bedrooms suffer to enable a larger dining area. One large bedroom able to accommodate a harpsichord with an east facing balcony would be appealing I must say.

Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus Re: Condo for Rent - 03-24-2017, 12:29 AM

Sister Lamb,


Is there any possible way of lowering the rent? Perhaps I could do some work for you of some kind? I know you mentioned living in your home but I don't think that would be appropriate, ma'am. I know you are watchful of your impeccable reputation and I would do nothing to smear that through the appearance of evil.


I could afford perhaps $1000 per month since I am attending University and have to keep my tithes up or I get failing grades, you see. Perhaps I could work at your restaurant in some capacity - or I am open to suggestions. I am a strong, able-bodied, well built young man whose heart is in line with the will of God and whose mind always is stayed upon Him.


Pastor Ezekiel himself has often asked me to care for his horses (although he doesn't remember my name most of the time) so I am sure between my trust fund and my gnathology and any salary you might offer, I could maintain your condo to your liking. My friend Tom Taylor may someday join me in Freehold if he ever gets his head on straight and keeps his past behind him. Long story.


Please give it some thought, Miss Lamb. Pray about it fervently, as I will. Professor Brother Dr. Elmer would be a reference for my character.


Respectfully,
BrotherLarry


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Love Jesus Re: Condo for Rent - 03-24-2017, 01:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Oh, how I would love to be able to re-locate to Freehold and live in such a lovely home!

Unfortunately, my disability check is not that much to begin with. And I give 65% of my income to the Lord. I certainly would not feel right about cutting back on that. I only hope and pray that I am not being selfish in keeping the other 35% to live on.


Just last week, I had a handful of food and many glasses of name-brand soda pop. And I have several cups of tea every day with real milk. Are there any Thrifty Christian tips to help me cut back so that I can be a better servant to the Lord?

Sister Handmaiden,


My heart goes out to you. If it is your dream to live in Freehold, perhaps I can help you. There are certain properties within the city that are laying in decay which I can purchase and restore. It would then be my choice as to how much to charge for renting them. Please let me know if this is interesting to you at all. With very few exceptions all of these abandoned properties can be easily inhabitable although some may require exorcism. Brother Mayor Hold can give you further details.


Yours in the lovely Name of Jesus,
NRL


PS: I would cut back on tea, dear. Caffeine can give you uneven bosoms.


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Love Jesus Re: Condo for Rent - 03-24-2017, 01:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
What view do you get from the balcony I mean which way does it face. I'd prefer not west facing. Is short term available?

Darling Sister in the Lord:


I forgot to mention that there is a large music room. When mother lived there, she used it as a sewing room to make her famous Bible covers. The view in that room is east facing; there is also a large east facing bedroom and a south facing bedroom. A harpsichord is easily placed in either of these since Mother had a grand piano (10 ft) and a banjo (she couldn't play) and there were no issues moving in. I should tell you that Mother and Father left with a bad opinion of LBC so there is some graffiti that even as we speak is being removed. I dare not put that language in a ladies' forum. When the new tenant is selected, all of that will be gone.


I am able to accept a short term tenant; approximately what term of lease is desired? Should you move in, we'll simply HAVE to have some girl talk when I am in town. Perhaps you could go along on one of my journeys. It would be such fun!


I look so forward to hearing from you, my dearest.
NRL


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Love Jesus Re: Condo for Rent - 03-24-2017, 02:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
Sister Lamb,


Please give it some thought, Miss Lamb. Pray about it fervently, as I will. Professor Brother Dr. Elmer would be a reference for my character.


Respectfully,
BrotherLarry

BrotherLarry,


I have spent time in prayer this evening. I am always in need of a good man to work in my business and part time work is, indeed, available to supplement your work with animals. I'm told you have lots in common with horses, my dear sir. Here is something for you to pray about:


1. You could do as I am offering Sister Handmaiden: wait until I purchase one of the abandoned but lovely residences in Freehold and then rent it at a greatly reduced price.
2. Move in the separate residence located on the grounds of my home on Apostle's Park Court. It has 2 bedrooms, a huge yard (fenced in for animals - even horses!) and is hooked up to Flint Cable and Flint High Speed Internet, which uses JesOS exclusively. It has its own pool and of course it is on my private surveillance camera system for your security and safety. Since you would be working for me, there would be no rent expected but your utilities would be your own responsibility. It's within a five minute drive of campus.
3. Reside in one of the luxuriously appointed rooms within my breathtaking home. I can provide a description of the estate if you'd like. Your privacy is assured and the home is large enough that you will never feel encroached upon. Pastor Ezekiel has stayed in the room I have in mind for you, as has Dr. Niles, Brother Bathfire, Brother King, Brother Des, and numerous other men who always told me they were completely satisfied. Some of them would probably prefer that they are not named.


Do think about it and seek the Lord's Voice. We can then discuss options with which you feel most comfortable. You're always welcome at the Blood of the Lamb Estate!


A Sister in Jesus,
NRL


PS: I have emailed you an application for employment with Naomi's Moist Pie; however, if you'd choose rather to something around the home for me or perhaps rehab the houses I buy, that's fine too. Just PLEASE tell me what will make you satisfied. I want to know.


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Jesus Re: Condo for Rent - 03-24-2017, 06:16 AM

Sister Lamb,


I prayed about this for quite some time this evening and the Lord spake unto me while I was kneeling. He said:


Brother Larry?
and I said: Yes.
And He said, Brother Larry, aren't you forgetting something?
and I said, What.
And He said, I have not yet moved on the residency application.
and I said, But why, Lord?
And He said: These things take time.


So, perhaps the best option right now is for you to go ahead and purchase a home, fix it up and maybe by the time that's all done my application will be approved. Do you have any pull with the Housing Committee or whatever it's called?


You truly are a special kind of person, Sister Lamb, and I pray that God will always keep you in the palm of His Hand.


Respectfully,
BrotherLarry


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-26-2017, 07:04 PM

Sister Mitza hasn't given me a response since I mentioned a bit more about the home. I would love to help all of you who responded but it does appear Sister Mitza has the finances to afford this move. I just need to know if she's still interested.


In the meantime, I contacted True Christian™ realtors in the area to find some of the abandoned homes of which I wrote. I've located several very nice homes, some of which will require exorcism, fumigating, spiritual anointing, blessing, and excavation of what I could only find listed as "evidence not to be spoken of in public."


Perhaps the Mayor will be able to explain that last comment. Sweet Johny Joe - one of my favorite and most loyal customers - has always been quick to come when I needed him.


Christ's Faithful Dainty Pearldrop,
NRL


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-26-2017, 08:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post
In the meantime, I contacted True Christian™ realtors in the area to find some of the abandoned homes of which I wrote. I've located several very nice homes, some of which will require exorcism, fumigating, spiritual anointing, blessing, and excavation of what I could only find listed as "evidence not to be spoken of in public."
Thank, Sister Lamb, (may I call you Naomi?) for your kind offer. For a number of reasons, I feel that Jesus would rather that I be Baltimore bound for the foreseeable future.


Praise Jesus that I have been girded about in resistance to mariolatry. Praise Jesus that I can give at least 65% of my income to True Christian™ causes and still have a room to live in and ramen noodles to dine upon on alternate Wednesdays.


Selling all my jewelry to pay the rent was an opportunity to obey God by banishing vanity from my life. Selling my car was a blessing because it keeps me in the house and praying. Cutting back on expensive, protein-rich foods has made Jesus more real and immediate to me as I slow down and find it easier to enter into a deeper state of mind to praise Him.


It is so gratifying to see the ways that Jesus has blessed you with abundance, Sister. I have faith that, with a little more prayer and continual tithing, Jesus will provide for me in the same way.


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
Des's Avatar
Des Des is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Real American™ Friend of Jesus Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! Tell her once Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian Sons of Liberty Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Early riser Super Soaker Baptism Award One Year/1000 posts Teabag Patriot True Christian Hotrodder Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! 2015 Witch Hunt Award Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A True Christian Nerd Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars

 
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 05:41 AM

Brother Larry,

I highly recommend staying in one of Sister Lamb's rooms. They are set aside specifically for Godly visitors, visiting pastors, student theologians and the like. Sister Lamb has done such an incredible job with the place that you will think you are staying in a luxury resort rather than a home.


Why when I stayed there during a federal investigation which proved to be unsubstantiated lies because no evidence of human smuggling was ever found, all Visas were discovered under their bedroom pillows rather than locked in one of my safes as claimed, and the alleged brands were demonstrated by a convincing attorney to have been either self inflicted or the result of oven burns. Where was I?


Oh yes, when I stayed there I was provided with turndown service that included an exceptionally delicious piece of pie left on the pillow. The housekeeper assigned to my room was a young slant eyed woman with absolutely no trace of an accent, and she even wore a maid uniform! Unbelievable, I know, but I found the place a safe harbor from the storms of the lying secular world that assailed me.


Maybe think about staying there until you find a more permanent place.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
MitzaLizalor's Avatar
MitzaLizalor MitzaLizalor is offline
Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Heaven Bound Mission to Australia Christian Love Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth TC Bravery The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady Pro-Life True Scientist™ True Christian™ True Christian Artist True Christian Beauty Most Obedient Batman Shooting Survivor Kangi Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Early riser Nuts for JESUS! Touched by Jesus Color wheel Trumpette Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Stamp of Approval Tagging for Jesus In Love With Zeke BFF of Jesus God's chosen ones Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Grammar Nazi GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Aardvark

 
Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 07:00 AM

@Naomi Ruth Lamb thanks for remembering me I wouldn't wish to push in front of anyone The east-facing room sounds perfect for early mornings
Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
Thomas Taylor's Avatar
Thomas Taylor Thomas Taylor is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Christian Love Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts A for Effort

 
Posts: 1,485
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Reaping Bountifully
Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 09:48 AM

Dear Sister Naomi,


How many thousand square feet is it. I am in need of somewhere with a floor area of around 12000sqft


YIC
TT


Isaiah 66:15

For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.
Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
MitzaLizalor's Avatar
MitzaLizalor MitzaLizalor is offline
Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Heaven Bound Mission to Australia Christian Love Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth TC Bravery The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady Pro-Life True Scientist™ True Christian™ True Christian Artist True Christian Beauty Most Obedient Batman Shooting Survivor Kangi Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Early riser Nuts for JESUS! Touched by Jesus Color wheel Trumpette Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Stamp of Approval Tagging for Jesus In Love With Zeke BFF of Jesus God's chosen ones Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Grammar Nazi GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Aardvark

 
Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 10:31 AM

3
Reply With Quote
(#15)
Old
Thomas Taylor's Avatar
Thomas Taylor Thomas Taylor is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Christian Love Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts A for Effort

 
Posts: 1,485
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Reaping Bountifully
Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Thomas Taylor is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 12:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
3

My apologies Sister, in my haste to find yet another retreat, where I can secrete myself from whoever it is that won't stop following me, I failed to notice the size.
Please let me know if you know somewhere that has the following attributes/amenities:
1. Approx 1200sqft
2. Fully secure with armed guard controlled access
3. 24hr rapid armed response
4. Bullet proof windows
5. Laser, motion, heat, ir, etc. alarm system
6. Fully fitted kitchen
7. Large well appointed bathrooms
8. Pre-screened house-girls to perform maintenance duties.
9. On site servant quarters


If you are able to find somewhere to this specification please let me know.


YIC
TT
P.S. Budget is around is around $1250/sqft


Isaiah 66:15

For behold, the Lord wil come with fire, and with his charets like a whirlewinde, to render his anger with furie, and his rebuke with flames of fire.
Reply With Quote
(#16)
Old
MitzaLizalor's Avatar
MitzaLizalor MitzaLizalor is offline
Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Heaven Bound Mission to Australia Christian Love Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth TC Bravery The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady Pro-Life True Scientist™ True Christian™ True Christian Artist True Christian Beauty Most Obedient Batman Shooting Survivor Kangi Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Early riser Nuts for JESUS! Touched by Jesus Color wheel Trumpette Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Stamp of Approval Tagging for Jesus In Love With Zeke BFF of Jesus God's chosen ones Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Grammar Nazi GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Aardvark

 
Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 01:11 PM

I'm not really used to floor-plans measured in square feet; we use a unit equivalent to 100sq.ft. but I'll let you know if I hear of anything.

It's always possible that The Pastors will be arranging a missionary trip and I know they take security seriously. In some areas for instance savages can't wait to steal Bibles for nefarious purposes and more recently of course demon possessed zealots operate Bible burning squads. Satan doesn't want anyone hearing about Jesus but The Truth is not something he can suppress for ever. Ot even at all. The LORD adds to His congregation every day those whom He will save and The Bible is our main weapon in furthering His agenda, hence the strict security protocol.

Drop a quick message to one of them to see whether there'd be a position for you on the next trip.
Reply With Quote
(#17)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 05:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas Taylor View Post
My apologies Sister, in my haste to find yet another retreat, where I can secrete myself from whoever it is that won't stop following me, I failed to notice the size.
Please let me know if you know somewhere that has the following attributes/amenities:
1. Approx 1200sqft
2. Fully secure with armed guard controlled access
3. 24hr rapid armed response
4. Bullet proof windows
5. Laser, motion, heat, ir, etc. alarm system
6. Fully fitted kitchen
7. Large well appointed bathrooms
8. Pre-screened house-girls to perform maintenance duties.
9. On site servant quarters


If you are able to find somewhere to this specification please let me know.


YIC
TT
P.S. Budget is around is around $1250/sqft

Tommy,


I don't say this to bring dismay, but Freehold does have a strict "True Christians™ Only" policy. There are areas outside the gates of Freehold that are marginally nice. In my research to find housing I came upon many obstacles (not the least of which is the application for residency in the gated city of Freehold - ridiculous) and yet, there is always a way if it's God's will. You might try to find something in one of the nearby villages until such time as the Department of Faith is satisfied with your knowledge of scripture, tithing, and complete dedication to the Baptist way of life. I know you to be a man of solid, rock hard principles that display particularly nicely in your tight uniform breeches and overcoat. But it's not all about being handsome.


Again, don't despair. Maintain a prayerful, humble spirit and maybe Jesus will notice you long enough to completely save your wretched soul from the pits of Hell, darling. Um, I mean, Bro.


COME, LORD JESUS!
BrotherLarry


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#18)
Old
Des's Avatar
Des Des is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Real American™ Friend of Jesus Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! Tell her once Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian Sons of Liberty Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Early riser Super Soaker Baptism Award One Year/1000 posts Teabag Patriot True Christian Hotrodder Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! 2015 Witch Hunt Award Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A True Christian Nerd Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars

 
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 10:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas Taylor View Post
My apologies Sister, in my haste to find yet another retreat, where I can secrete myself from whoever it is that won't stop following me, I failed to notice the size.
Please let me know if you know somewhere that has the following attributes/amenities:
1. Approx 1200sqft
2. Fully secure with armed guard controlled access
3. 24hr rapid armed response
4. Bullet proof windows
5. Laser, motion, heat, ir, etc. alarm system
6. Fully fitted kitchen
7. Large well appointed bathrooms
8. Pre-screened house-girls to perform maintenance duties.
9. On site servant quarters


If you are able to find somewhere to this specification please let me know.


YIC
TT
P.S. Budget is around is around $1250/sqft
Add 500 square feet to that and you have my maintenance vehicle garage. You will have to come up with your own surface to air defense though because SOMEONE in town doesn't respect my CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT TO HAVE AND BEAR ANTI-AIRCRAFT RIFLES!


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
Reply With Quote
(#19)
Old
Naomi Ruth Lamb's Avatar
Naomi Ruth Lamb Naomi Ruth Lamb is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Best Pie True Christian™ Cleanest Kitchen True Christian Lady Prayer Warrior True Christian Homemaker Most Obedient Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Early riser Proud Niglet Sponsorer In Love With Zeke Persecuted Real American™ The Lord’s Witness Wound TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion True Republican Christian Love Kirk Cameron Fan Club Stamp of Approval BFF of Jesus Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Pie Saved 1 Year

 
Posts: 991
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: 1380 Apostle's Park Ct, Freehold
Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.Naomi Ruth Lamb has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-27-2017, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Des View Post
Brother Larry,

I highly recommend staying in one of Sister Lamb's rooms. They are set aside specifically for Godly visitors, visiting pastors, student theologians and the like. Sister Lamb has done such an incredible job with the place that you will think you are staying in a luxury resort rather than a home.

Why Brother Des, you silky fox, you. How you DO flatter a girl. I recall your visits well (and the Federal agents visits for weeks after). It was a real answer to prayer when no evidence was found linking you to wrongdoing. I know you and I had a rough start when you used to fly those drones by my beaudoir windows, but I was so grateful when I learned they were for my safety and security and their video recordings were erased completely each night. I miss the hum of their little motors now and then. When and if I move back to Freehold permanently I so hope you'll stop in to see me. I'll cook you a supper you won't forget, Sir.


Oh, I almost forgot to mention, someone from Homeland Security called asking if I was still in touch with you. Out of respect for your privacy I told him absolutely nothing.


Sisterly Hugs,
NRL


1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
Locations in 50 States and Canada
!Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.
Reply With Quote
(#20)
Old
Des's Avatar
Des Des is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Real American™ Friend of Jesus Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love Persecuted Porn Resistant Guns, Guts and GLORY! Tell her once Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian Sons of Liberty Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Early riser Super Soaker Baptism Award One Year/1000 posts Teabag Patriot True Christian Hotrodder Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! 2015 Witch Hunt Award Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A True Christian Nerd Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars

 
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Des will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Condo for Rent - 03-28-2017, 05:38 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Naomi Ruth Lamb View Post


Oh, I almost forgot to mention, someone from Homeland Security called asking if I was still in touch with you. Out of respect for your privacy I told him absolutely nothing.
Oh, yes, right, well, hmmm. I'm sure it's nothing. Probably just about that time somebody did that thing at that place where some stuff was left and I may have had some luggage dropped off at a warehouse in another town but someone got confused and dropped it by the docks there and hair samples and some Russian dock workers confused an undercover agent for a bear and it was all a big mix up and nobody was hurt except for some broken ribs because of a bulletproof vest and the Russian sailors had to leave in a hurry with their cargo unsold and I wasn't there and know nothing about it and they have the number for my attorney and shouldn't be contacting third parties over a silly misunderstanding that I had forgotten all about and Mr Handler said could be swept under the rug anyway because there are bigger fish to fry than Ruskies who may or may not be making a few extra bucks by importing a few crates of Chinese finger puzzles when nobody in China wants them and the demand in the States and Europe is very limited ever since Moldova started producing what a lot of fools consider superior products for the same price.


I wouldn't worry about it.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved