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Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
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Default Which Jesus are you? - 10-14-2021, 10:26 PM
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I'm somewhere between 7 and 3 today.




“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-14-2021, 10:41 PM
I have mixed feelings about Jesus # 2. Shouldn't He have a gun in both hands?

His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-14-2021, 10:58 PM
No Jesus wears a Covid mask. Just what I thought.

Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-15-2021, 08:03 AM
If anyone ever feels a #8 please call my office for an appointment.

Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for President in 2024
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 03:34 PM
8 looks a bit idolatrous with that heart thing.
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 04:33 PM
Sometimes, I am a #7, such as when the ladies are coming over for afternoon tea and cake. More often than not, though, I am #3, especially when those darned Cathyolick kids next door kick their football into my prize-winning dahlias!



(Mrs.) Isabella White

Hebrews 10:19 "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 06:27 PM
4 is when I get a great parking spot.
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 07:50 PM
#2 on paydays.





#5 is a Jedi, btw.

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Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 10:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
#5 is a Jedi, btw.
You seem confused about the tribes of Israel. Matthew 1:1–6 and Luke 3:31–34 give Jesus's lineage as the Tribe of Judah.

Your confusion comes from the fact that (i) Jedi and Judah begin with a "J" and (ii) you your life on a couch watching secondhand DVDs from a charity store when you could have been doing something useful like praying.




“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-16-2021, 11:15 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
#2 on paydays.
Hmf. I suppose you mean the hard drinking part. Being a pinko pacifist atheist, I don't suppose you feel the drive to pick up a gun.

Honestly, if you aren't willing to take up arms to defend your beliefs, do you really believe anything? You may as well just not believe.

His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: Which Jesus are you? - 10-17-2021, 12:30 AM
Usually #3, due to the amount of sin and worldliness I have to put up with on a daily basis. #2 is almost a spitting image of me and the fellas on one of our nights out, minus the long hair and plus a hood.

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