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Skull Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-11-2019, 02:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeb Stuart Thurmond View Post
Fusion cuisine has gone out of control:
I hear that. Why do they have to make all the cleaning chemicals look like Kool-Aid?

It just causes all sorts of problems. A few years back, one of my motel cleaning ladies (Maritza or Marisol or something) brought her anchor baby to work and it drank a bunch of the drain cleaner from her cart because it looked like blue raspberry punch. The little beaner brat ended up dying and the maid freaked out and stopped working very hard. She became quite a nuisance, really, and I ended up having to call ICE and they got rid of her for me. Thank God for ICE!


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-25-2019, 12:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa View Post
I am deeply offended by the TSA sickout.
Come on, people!!! While I have not suffered the effects of a shutdown, what if I had to travel - that would be such an inconvenience, to have to stand in even longer lines just because of some TSA agents who don't want to work without receiving pay!

This is ridiculous. Don't they know that they should not ask what the country can do for them????
^^^ This is still true (all these federal workers whining for their government handouts just make me sick, why don't they make an effort to pull themselves by their bootstraps?), but now I'm also offended by the liberals and their "global warming" shtick - and them saying that the fact it's FREAKING COLD right now doesn't matter because polar ice, average global temperatures, blah blah blah - I do not care about any of this, I only care about the fact my rear end FREEZES each time I get out these days, and that PROVES there is no global warming!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-25-2019, 09:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa View Post
^^^ This is still true (all these federal workers whining for their government handouts just make me sick, why don't they make an effort to pull themselves by their bootstraps?), but now I'm also offended by the liberals and their "global warming" shtick - and them saying that the fact it's FREAKING COLD right now doesn't matter because polar ice, average global temperatures, blah blah blah - I do not care about any of this, I only care about the fact my rear end FREEZES each time I get out these days, and that PROVES there is no global warming!
Here it is - clear as day from Trump's tweet on March 23 of last year, and plenty of warning time to start setting aside a little money. Like it's not the first time in history that the government shut down - if you were paying any attention in school (or maybe that's why you need a government job).

I too am sick of the whining - cushy government job, nice benefits (no ObamaCare), and very little downside other that you might have to tighten your belt a little once in awhile, turn off the cable, drop your expensive cell plan, set aside some savings, find a nice Baptist church to attend, and most importantly - never vote for Democrats. Does it say that in the FAQ - how stupid can you be?

Hello Nancy Pelosi - are you still there? What year is it? Obama is no longer president and Hillary lost.

Quote:
March 23, 2018
. . .

“I am considering a VETO of the Omnibus Spending Bill based on the fact that the 800,000 plus DACA recipients have been totally abandoned by the Democrats (not even mentioned in Bill) and the BORDER WALL, which is desperately needed for our National Defense, is not fully funded,” Trump wrote on Twitter at 9 a.m. EDT.

“But I say to Congress I will never sign another bill like this again,” he told reporters. “I’m not going to do it again.”

. . .
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-u...-idUSKBN1GY15X


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-25-2019, 11:53 PM

Talk about fudging the numbers! Has anyone else noticed that whenever "records are broken" and you take a closer look it's always the most |warming proponentist unit of observation| since |records began/1894/other| followed by some arbitrary location such as a particular street or time of day as if we're all idiots?








1. cold, hot, wet, dry, volcanic eruptions, bees
2. cold, hot, wet, dry, volcanic eruptions, bees
3. EXAMPLES INCLUDE:
. . . .•in Osboldoston Street
. . . .•at 4 o'clock on Friday January 13th
. . . .•under the tree opposite the railway station
. . . .•when there's a full moon but no clouds & it's raining
. . . . . . . .
(or just about anything else a 4-year-old could think up)
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-31-2019, 06:15 PM

Henpecked sissy liberal husbands referring to their wives as "the smart one". Please, stop. It's not true (you know it isn't) and it's never cute.


Some days... I walk past my fellow brethren; men of Christ washed in Christ's blood. And I thank Lord Jesus Christ, my sinful days are long, LONG since behind me. I thank you Jesus for allowing me to accept you as my Savior, and leading me in the path of righteousness.
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Rebuke Re: What are you offended by right now? - 01-31-2019, 06:45 PM

I am offended by the Democrats thinking America would vote for a queer for President.


South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg (Pronounced boot-a-judge) is exploring a run for President against our beloved Donald (may everything he touches turn to gold). First of all, the guy hasn't even lost all his baby teeth. He's married to a MAN. He is OPENLY gay - something I cannot imagine - and he is in charge of a city in the most backward state in the union (well, except for West Virginia) with a population of 107,000. Most of those are Notre Dame students, a catholic university espousing all manner of liberal things like science and logic. Logic? Not in OUR White House. What next? Instead of the president's cabinet, it will be his armoire?


Oh, to make himself look butch, he mentioned he served in the Army. I bet. How many men did he molest while they slept? I am sure when he appeared on the View today Whoopi didn't ask that question.


Offended? No. I am outraged. We need to ignite Donald Trump's base. Set it on FIRE. People, start speaking out now, lest the state of the union be declared fabulous.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-28-2019, 11:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. Aaron Portway View Post
The constant flow of Unsaved Trash that insist on coming onto our Godly Forum to persecute us.

And people who speak Mexican instead of American. That AWLAYS offends me.

And if I really think about it, Mexicans almost always seem to manage to offend me in some way, everytime I run into them.

So basically, Unsaved Trash and Mexicans.
Mexican? Do you mean Spanish? Porque hablo espanol bastante bien junto col el ingles y soy americano.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-28-2019, 11:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
Mexican? Do you mean Spanish? Porque hablo espanol bastante bien junto col el ingles y soy americano.
Really? On the basis of what you've written there, even disregarding your sad inability to type accents/diacritics and distinguish grammatical gender, I genuinely doubt it. Because I can see two other errors, and I don't even pretend to speak Spanish.


Revelation 21:8

But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-28-2019, 11:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
Really? On the basis of what you've written there, even disregarding your sad inability to type accents/diacritics and distinguish grammatical gender, I genuinely doubt it. Because I can see two other errors, and I don't even pretend to speak Spanish.
I'm on my laptop. I can't type accents so.. Villeicht gehe ich mit Deutsch, da es keine Akazente hat. Run that through google translate if you wish. And why did I get an infraction for speaking Spanish? Because "Normal" people can't understand me? Is there a problem with speaking different languages? Did you get an infraction for speaking Armenian?
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-29-2019, 12:21 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
I'm on my laptop. I can't type accents so.. Villeicht gehe ich mit Deutsch, da es keine Akazente hat. Run that through google translate if you wish. And why did I get an infraction for speaking Spanish? Because "Normal" people can't understand me? Is there a problem with speaking different languages? Did you get an infraction for speaking Armenian?
Vielleicht gehe ich mit Deutsch, da es keine Akzente hat. Otherwise it does not makes sense.


And "col" means kale.


Congrats, you have made it! You have failed in 3 different languages!


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.

Last edited by Brother Gonzalez; 03-29-2019 at 11:15 AM.
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-29-2019, 01:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
...y soy americano.
¿Americana? ¡Todos somos americanos, tu eres norteamericana!

That was angrily shouted at me explained to me by an extremely cranky customs officer in one of the remote south Mexican states (Perú, if I remember correctly). My theory is that he has just learned that his wife has left him, because he found something wrong in the paperwork of every single tourist.

By the way, thanks for acknowledging you are a man (americano) rather than woman (americana).
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-29-2019, 05:28 PM

"Spare time" offends me deeply. Must be an elitist millennial invention. How can anyone spare time for anything other than work and Jesus?


Some days... I walk past my fellow brethren; men of Christ washed in Christ's blood. And I thank Lord Jesus Christ, my sinful days are long, LONG since behind me. I thank you Jesus for allowing me to accept you as my Savior, and leading me in the path of righteousness.
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Isabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-29-2019, 11:14 PM

I think I'd have to say Women's Lib has done more harm than enough, and much of it is thanks to that horrible TV show from the 70s, about that mouthy Maude. Why, any good Christian woman knows her place is in the home, keeping the house spotless, cooking tasty meals for hubby, raising the children to be good, Godly HOME-SCHOOLED kids, and making sure the husband gets the loving welcome he deserves when he comes through that door. But nowadays, it's the "me, me, me" women's crowd that thinks they're the ones who should run things, and that includes that Godless bunch of female preachers that I've seen on TV! Oh, how the Lord grieves!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-30-2019, 07:42 PM

Sister White,


It pains me to think of a sweet thing like you being offended. Why, if I could, I would remove every offensive thing in the world so you could live in perfect peace. I still see my relative burning in hell every time I gaze at you - and that touches the cockles of my heart and ignites the very bowels of my being.


On my next ministry trip near you, I hope you'll come hear me preach to the homers. Sometimes we hold services in unorthodox places but I always reach the sinner where he hangs out most.


Yours in our Delightful Savior,
BrotherLarry


PS: I am offended by things that offend dear Sister White.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-30-2019, 08:51 PM

Snow. Snow offends me. It's officially the spring and yet, it is snowing! Where is global waming (as our Godly President puts it) when we need it?


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Isabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureIsabella White has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 03-30-2019, 10:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
Sister White,


It pains me to think of a sweet thing like you being offended. Why, if I could, I would remove every offensive thing in the world so you could live in perfect peace. I still see my relative burning in hell every time I gaze at you - and that touches the cockles of my heart and ignites the very bowels of my being.


On my next ministry trip near you, I hope you'll come hear me preach to the homers. Sometimes we hold services in unorthodox places but I always reach the sinner where he hangs out most.


Yours in our Delightful Savior,
BrotherLarry


PS: I am offended by things that offend dear Sister White.

Oh, bless your great big, saved heart, Brother Larry! I am so happy that you see dear Celestina when you look at me. And thank you for providing words of comfort to this old lady. Why, I would be delighted to hear you preach to the homersexualists sometime. You know, my dear deceased husband, Wilbur, used to do something similar -- although, I could never understand why he couldn't attend meetings that were earlier in the daytime. He used to go out around 10:00pm (or later) and for some strange reason, the meetings were often held in his favorite health spa. But he brought many fine men to their knees in prayer, so he said. Anyway, thank you again, Dear, and may the Lord richly bless you as you continue to service in His service. Sincerely, Isabella W.



Lift ye then your voices;
Swell the mighty flood;
Louder still and louder
Praise the precious .
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 04-04-2019, 11:45 AM

There are people who get up around 10 p.m. for whom the day starts at midnight with the main event about 4 (in the morning) and who wouldn't know how many days had passed unless for some reason they went to freak out in the park but let's face it even outdoors they probably can't tell the difference between day & night.

Perhaps some members of the congregation are familiar with that environment from before The LORD sought them out and know what comes next. Yes, all the crackpots are out recruiting, new-age crystal gazers, alien worshippers, Buddhists, people who think we're attached to moon by an invisible cord sprouting out the top of your head except they. can see it (of course!) anyway it's the alien worshippers I need to focus on here.

Maybe a few pictures will set the mood.
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From Left: some sort of bizarre yoga; conical device to focus alien telepathic beams? or just a silly hat; bald people should not wear man buns; an alien with his invisible photon ship


Having pronounced himself the conduit for messages telepathic transmissions from God aliens under the guise of Yahweh and the Elohim, this Francophone has promoted himself to "Maitreya" (a type of demon having retroactive presence in the world today) for which I can provide dates as follows:


DATECLAIMVIDEO LINK
click flying saucer for y/t
closed captions available throughout
Jul 1995Space photon
Apr 2003I am the Maitreya
Aug 2007A transmission to Elohim
WARNINGa french guru sings
Oct 2017Sung transmission to Yahweh
WARNINGcontent
Jun 2018New head groomage
1. he seems to be saying he is a space photon
––but it could be an alien transmission in progress

2.
Elohim is all the aliens
3.
Yahweh is just one alien



So far, then, he is a space photon (whatever that is) and the Maitreya, the telepathic Elohim and a telepathic Yahweh, as well as being Raël. Notice how the head is groomed in different ways throughout this retrospective? It struck me that his portfolio is lacking one persona, leading to some more pictures where I think you'll see what I mean.

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Silly hats for every occasion. From Left: the Indian fakir look with curly moustache; a different and increasing familiar style with matching hat


There were various earlier styles from the space photon era with a bit of a hippie theme. Above are two more recent, one showing the Indian fakir look with a silly hat, the other wearing a different hat and alternative shrubbery. Before I conclude with what's so disturbing for Christians, it may be helpful to include some of his missionaries.

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From Left: missionary 1; missionary 2 in foreground; missionary 3


Altogether, what with bizarre yoga exercises, the cone-head alien device, blasphemous claims of identity which are mutually exclusive on many fronts, head groomage taken in conjunction with the missionaries, this can mean only one thing. The wretch is about to declare himself “Mahdi.”

Such a conclusion must be offensive to just about everyone!
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 04-10-2019, 02:19 PM

I'm offended by spoiled brats misbehaving on airplanes. There should be a federal law prohibiting any child under 14 from flying commercial. They make it so painful for the rest of us! We need to start a petition on this, people. This is more important even than separating children from their parents on the messican border!
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Isabella White Isabella White is offline
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 04-10-2019, 05:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa View Post
I'm offended by spoiled brats misbehaving on airplanes. There should be a federal law prohibiting any child under 14 from flying commercial. They make it so painful for the rest of us! We need to start a petition on this, people. This is more important even than separating children from their parents on the messican border!
Oh, I am so sorry to hear of this, dear Sister Basilissa. My goodness, those youngsters can ruin the pleasantness that one hopes for when being on an aeroplane. Heavens above, I hope they did not cause you too much distress when you were trying to enjoy your Darjeeling and scones. Did the airline serve their best tea in their delightful Wedgwood bone china cups? A blessed day to you, Dear. Sincerely, Isabella W.



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Praise the precious .
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Default Re: What are you offended by right now? - 04-11-2019, 11:19 PM

Even little girls are listening to death metal these days. I was walking through the park when heard a little girl repeating lyrics from, I don't know, probably either Maryland Mansion or Six Inch Nails, the song goes "cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye" (I didn't hear what came next, my disciplining interrupted her).
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