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Default Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-27-2006, 07:55 AM

Anyone who believes that giving to any church except Landover Baptist will get you to heaven is a false religion. The only way that you can get to heaven is by tithing and trusting in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Please read my thread "How to get to heaven when you die" in the felloship area.
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Default Re: Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-27-2006, 12:03 PM

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Anyone who believes that giving to any church except Landover Baptist will get you to heaven is a false religion. The only way that you can get to heaven is by tithing and trusting in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Please read my thread "How to get to heaven when you die" in the felloship area.
You're an interesting fellow...

I thought you don't wanna tithe to "god's-favourite" church. But now you're saying you want to give them your entire earthly fortune. You're a funny guy.


Soon in Christ
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Default Re: Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-27-2006, 03:49 PM

You are all hopped up on goofballs aren't you, hippie? You should stop blaspheming and start tithing -- the Paypal button works wonders for that which ails you. Showing a little love for God (ie. Landover, who is God's Church here on earth) might entice Him to stop sending demons up your anus to where your head resides (as if there were a difference).
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Default Re: Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-27-2006, 04:45 PM

Tithing alone is not enough to get into Heaven, you are right about that. One must also believe in Jesus as the Savior of mankind.

Tithing is important though, the verses showing this have already been mentioned by others. The question is, who to tithe to? That answer to that is simple, you tithe to God's favorite church, Landover Baptist.
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Default Re: Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-27-2006, 05:19 PM

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Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx View Post
Anyone who believes that giving to any church except Landover Baptist will get you to heaven is a false religion. The only way that you can get to heaven is by tithing and trusting in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Please read my thread "How to get to heaven when you die" in the felloship area.
As a True Christian™ Triple-Platinum Tither here at landover I take issue with your words.
Our Pastors categorically tell us daily that our money is well spent and that a place is reserved in Heaven for us and Jesus shall be waiting.

How dare you call our good Pastors liars!!

You Spam us with your Yappitty-Yap-Yap pretending to be a Baptist. You are nothing but an Evil Demon sent here to cause trouble.



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Default Re: Anyone who believes that giving to a church will get you to heaven is false. - 09-28-2006, 02:29 AM

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Originally Posted by xfrodobagginsx View Post
Anyone who believes that giving to any church except Landover Baptist will get you to heaven is a false religion. The only way that you can get to heaven is by tithing and trusting in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. Please read my thread "How to get to heaven when you die" in the felloship area.
Thank you so much for your expert advice. Of course, we take the advice of someone who can't spell and chose to name himself after a hobbit very seriously! May I ask what church you think is good? It wouldn't happen to be in Isengard would it? Since you are xfrodo, perhaps you worship the wizard Sauerman?


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