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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 01-24-2011, 04:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oakland "Reb" Griner View Post
Would partial stoning be an appropriate punishment for lesser crimes?

Seems like giving miscreants just a taste of God's preferred punishment for such infractions as speeding, littering and intemperancy might ward off having to give them the full treatment later on for a more serious sin . . .
Generally speaking, the more heinous the crime the smaller the stones you use. Small stones rip off the flesh and chip away at bone slowly, so it can take days to die.

For the smaller crimes, you want to use a couple of large boulders to smash the skull and get it over with quickly.


Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 01-25-2011, 03:10 PM

Was this recorded at your "Stoning Festval?"



"And the LORD was with Judah; and he drave out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley, because they had chariots of iron." - Judges 1:19
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 01-26-2011, 01:51 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by InvisiblePinkUnicorn View Post
Was this recorded at your "Stoning Festval?"

You won't be laughing when you're pink skin turns a roasted brown in hell. Ever smelled a horse burn, it isn't nice.







Note: I have only smelled a horse burn because the neighbors died and he burned the body rather than leave it to rot. Unfortunately our house was down wind


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Gabriel Reproba Gabriel Reproba is offline
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 01-27-2011, 12:23 AM

I haven't heard back from Mr, Teebow yet. Does anyone still have his cell phone number from last summer when he came to our BBQ? (PM it to me, don't post it here publicly, of course.)


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 03-15-2011, 06:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
I always practice my stoning skills by stoning Mrs. Johnson's dogs. Proper stoning is a three phase process.
  1. First you need to immobilize the sinner by aiming for the legs, although burying them as Brother Gabriel Reproba suggests here works as well,
  2. then you hurt them as much as possible by damaging non vital parts of the body
  3. and then finally you go for the kill.
Maximizing the suffering of the woman being stoned is clearly demanded by God as a well deserved punishment for Eve's sinning: Genesis 3:16-19 "Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life; Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field; In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return."

Also it is a good preparation for Hell, where the sinner will go after being stoned and where the suffering will be much worse.
Holy shit! Are you "people" piffleing kidding me? What happened to you to make you so inhuman, cruel and mentally ill. Of course you are all "men" but very very mentally ill. Do you get hard-ons while thinking of stoning women? Thou shalt not Kill? Ring a bell? Hypocrite madmen I am so glad you all are but a tiny fraction of humanity. Palin will get crushed as she is a complete idiot, but if she does delusionally believe she can win, it will ensure the scary Black man 4 more years. Yea!

Oh and go ahead and make fun of my picture, my lesbean lover took it for me and I is one of God's creation! OK, go ahead and make fun of God's creation.
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 03-16-2011, 02:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Littlelady View Post
Holy shit! Are you "people" piffleing kidding me?
We don't kid when it comes to what the Bible says.

Quote:
What happened to you to make you so inhuman, cruel and mentally ill.
We read the Bible and strive to follow its instructions. If YOU think the Bible is inhuman, cruel, and causes mental illness, then it is a sign of your disconnect from God.

Quote:
Of course you are all "men" but very very mentally ill.
We are a community of both men and women who strive to follow the Lord.

Quote:
Do you get hard-ons while thinking of stoning women?
No. It is a horrible, horrible thing. It is not only the bloody execution of a criminal, but it is a sign that that human is on their way to Hell. We want to save as many people from Hell as possible. This is why we preach God's Word so that you may all know your fates and try to avoid the Lake of Fire describe in the Good Book.

Quote:
Thou shalt not Kill? Ring a bell?
Have you READ the Bible? Do you know what that commandment means? Do you think that the ENTIRE God-Fearing Republican party would support EVERY military action in the last 100 years if it were not for the hundreds of OTHER rules God laid out for us that tell us when to kill sinners? Do you know how many Death Warrants Bush signed when he was governor of Texas? And he is a Born Again Christian! Rumsfeld put Bible Quotes on the daily Iraq war briefing book for President Bush, for goodness sake. Do you think every Christian in the world has got this wrong? or is it possible that you have never read all of the Bible and have missed out on God's Laws?

Quote:
Oh and go ahead and make fun of my picture,
I would never make fun of a midget. I take pity on you. Your parents or other ancestors were obviously huge sinners for God to have cursed you
so horribly.

Since you haven't read the Bible, I will quote ONE of the many passages that explains your condition:
Quote:
Exodus 20:5 (King James Version)

5Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;
Quote:
my lesbean lover took it for me
You obviously have NOT read the Bible or you would not be a vagitarian.

I hope you see the light before the light you see if the fire of Hell!


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Palin 2012! - 03-16-2011, 02:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Littlelady View Post
Holy shit! Are you "people" piffleing kidding me? What happened to you to make you so inhuman, cruel and mentally ill. Of course you are all "men" but very very mentally ill. Do you get hard-ons while thinking of stoning women? Thou shalt not Kill? Ring a bell? Hypocrite madmen I am so glad you all are but a tiny fraction of humanity. Palin will get crushed as she is a complete idiot, but if she does delusionally believe she can win, it will ensure the scary Black man 4 more years. Yea!

Oh and go ahead and make fun of my picture, my lesbean lover took it for me and I is one of God's creation! OK, go ahead and make fun of God's creation.
Why you want that people make fun of your picture? That's very estrange ¿no? Perhap a other camera or different zoom would make a better photo maybe?

I'm no sure what you want to say whit all the rest of your writings before that.

Are you angry whit the world?
Are you sad that Jesus Lord in the Heaven don't loves you suficient?
Maybe you should pray for find why you are so sad and angry and perhap Jesus will open you and come in you to bright up your day and you live in generally sister.

I hope you reflex in this.
Pray. It work. Really.

YIC - Mari


Ex JW and quiet, shy, timid girl who wants to be a True Cristian Lady.
My favorite verse from the Bible is:
- A true WITNESSE deliuereth soules: but a deceitfull WITNESSE speaketh lyes.
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Gabriel Reproba Gabriel Reproba is offline
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Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Perry/Bachmann 2012! - 08-18-2011, 02:26 PM

Editorial note: I updated the title from "Sister Palin" to "Perry/Bachmann" since God has revealed that a Perry/Bachmann ticket is the way forward to Christian dominion over the world.


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Perry/Bachmann 2012! - 08-18-2011, 02:51 PM

I thought you all thought that women should be at home breeding?
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Perry/Bachmann 2012! - 08-18-2011, 03:04 PM

Wait... You have a day for that..? Oo
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Default Re: How To Stone Sinners: Preparing For Perry/Bachmann 2012! - 09-22-2011, 07:52 PM

Wooha there!

You have forgotten a very very important point.

Never ever start stoning in a circle around the victim! If the victim drops suddenly, a stoner could get hit upside the head or somewhere worse.

Always stone in a battle formation with the first wave throwing, then moving back while the next wave moves in, and then the third, depending on the number of stoners.


Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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