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Default Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 04:22 PM

I’ve always been a fan of Landover Baptist Church’s Deacon Fred. I have admired his use of decorating the hell house every Halloween with unborn fetuses to burn in flames at the end of the night to scare atheists and young women into keeping their rape babies. My only concern with the abortion laws is that there’ll be no more unborn fetuses to use as decoration. No more smell of hellbound unsaved babies in flames. How is Landover Baptist Church going to scare the unsaved this year? I thought about it and I think it’s best if this is planned ahead of time to prepare. I’m really happy rape babies will finally be born 100 percent but there needs to be a new way now to save the unbelievers now.



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Question Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 05:33 PM

This is indeed a conundrum. If women can't get abortions, then how can LBC get murdered fetuses to scare women away from getting abortions? Clearly these new anti-abortion laws are a pro-choice plot to erode the rights of Christians even further. By banning abortions, they've made it impossible to protest abortions. I'm not ashamed to call myself pro-life, and I think I've come up with a compromise solution: legalize abortion for racial minorities. Them we can have fetuses to use to scare white women away from getting abortions they can't legally get in the first place.

This is what Jesus would want. Pro-choice is anti-Christ! Legalize colored abortions now!


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 05:45 PM

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Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes View Post
This is indeed a conundrum. If women can't get abortions, then how can LBC get murdered fetuses to scare women away from getting abortions? Clearly these new anti-abortion laws are a pro-choice plot to erode the rights of Christians even further. By banning abortions, they've made it impossible to protest abortions. I'm not ashamed to call myself pro-life, and I think I've come up with a compromise solution: legalize abortion for racial minorities. Them we can have fetuses to use to scare white women away from getting abortions they can't legally get in the first place.

This is what Jesus would want. Pro-choice is anti-Christ! Legalize colored abortions now!
I agree, but we cannot let racial minorities to take decisions on abortions. So the people of God has to decide which babies are aborted and which aren't. For example, submissive couples will more likely have submissive babies, good for hard work.


There is a special Bro Gonz golden* statue for the first person to quote this post with the right Bible verse to support the fact that people of God can decide on abortions of enemies of God!




*Golden may refer to the color, not to the material itself.


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 06:24 PM

Aborting N̶i̶g̶g̶e̶r̶ (Ham) babies seems like it would indeed actually do God a service. White women would still step over them in the hell house but I think if you just say they are dirty that it should be fine. We just have to read Genesis 9 to know they are a curse. Attempting to eradicate it would be a good justification for this exception yes?


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 06:58 PM

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I agree, but we cannot let racial minorities to take decisions on abortions. So the people of God has to decide which babies are aborted and which aren't. For example, submissive couples will more likely have submissive babies, good for hard work.

There is a special Bro Gonz golden* statue for the first person to quote this post with the right Bible verse to support the fact that people of God can decide on abortions of enemies of God!
There's a bit of choice, isn't there, dear Brother? I can probably guess which one you have in mind, but I shall leave it to the Great Unwashed as-yet Unsaved to reply, as I have no desire for a golden statue.


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 07:10 PM

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Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
There's a bit of choice, isn't there, dear Brother? I can probably guess which one you have in mind, but I shall leave it to the Great Unwashed as-yet Unsaved to reply, as I have no desire for a golden statue.
The statue has no depiction of any God, demi-God, false God, or person whatsoever. It is like an Emmy, but for people knowing the Bible.
It is kind of cheating if a True Christian answers, yes, so I prefer an unsaved thrash to be the first.


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Skull Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 07:30 PM

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Aborting N̶i̶g̶g̶e̶r̶ (Ham) babies seems like it would indeed actually do God a service ... Attempting to eradicate it would be a good justification for this exception yes?
Yes and no. The Bible tells us that no bastard can get into Heaven (Deuteronomy 23:2). Approximately 67% of negro babies are born to unwed mothers. The 33% of negroes born to married parents should not be killed in the womb because they have a chance of salvation. If they choose to squander this chance (and the vast, vast majority of them will), they can be aborted at a later date by law enforcement officials, drug overdoses, or, most likely, by other coons. These legitimate darkies, however, do not concern us here. The bastard darkies are unsaveable. Even if one of them were to give himself over to Christ, live a blameless life according to the KJV 1611 Holy Bible, build churches, and convert hundreds of unbelievers, after his death Jesus would still dropkick his sorry black ass straight into the pit of Hell because his wicked parents fornicated out of wedlock. Not that this would ever happen, because he would in all probability be just another ghetto "gangsta" smoking "blunts" and "bustin' caps." Does it really matter if such vile people die in the womb or at the age of 99? They'll still wind up in Hell.

God wants us to slay heathen children (Hosea 13:16). We are prevented from doing this by man's law, which God wants us to follow (Titus 3:1). However, in most states and in many countries, it is legal to murder unborn children. Killing the unborn child of a True Christian™ (Exodus 20:13) woman would be an abominable sin. However, killing hellbound heathen fetuses, like the bastards I just described (Deuteronomy 23:2), or cripples and retards (Leviticus 21:17-20) is perfectly in line with God's word and makes Jesus smile.


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 07:43 PM

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The statue has no depiction of any God, demi-God, false God, or person whatsoever. It is like an Emmy, but for people knowing the Bible.
We have no need of such rewards - ours awaits us (and the sooner the better) in the form of an entry ticket to God's Eternal Realm! So, as you say, it is only fair that we allow the UnSaved the opportunity to actually learn something.


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 07:44 PM

Well, let’s just lobby Alabama to make it a law and hope that it goes to the newly conservative Supreme Court. We can make this happen Mister Lukes .


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 07:47 PM

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We have no need of such rewards - ours awaits us (and the sooner the better) in the form of an entry ticket to God's Eternal Realm! So, as you say, it is only fair that we allow the UnSaved the opportunity to actually learn something.
Yes, but don't hold your breath.


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Eagle Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 08:23 PM

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Originally Posted by BibleReader2231 View Post
Well, let’s just lobby Alabama to make it a law and hope that it goes to the newly conservative Supreme Court. We can make this happen Mister Lukes .
As always, the most useful and productive thing we can do is pray (Mark 11:24, Jeremiah 29:12, James 5:16, Matthew 21:22). Pray that the desiccated, shrivelled, husk of Ruth Bader Ginsburg finally succumbs to cancer or a stroke and that Jesus personally drags that evil old Jewess hag kicking and screaming into Hell. Then Donald will get a THIRD Supreme Court appointee in only 2.5 years, which is more than Osambo got in 8 years! Once the GOP has an iron grip on this country's judiciary, we can please God by repealing all kinds of sinful legislation that spits in His face: Roe v. Wade, Obergefell v. Hodges, Brown v. Board of Education, and Constitutional Amendments 1, 4-8, 13-16, 19, 22, and 24 for starters.


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 09:10 PM

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Originally Posted by BibleReader2231 View Post
Well, let’s just lobby Alabama to make it a law and hope that it goes to the newly conservative Supreme Court. We can make this happen Mister Lukes .
Hang on - I'm confused by your logic here. If it's only Alabama you're worried about then it isn't going to make a whole lot of difference to the overall availability of fetuses/feti, is it? In 2015 there were fewer than 6,000 abortions there, compared with 638,000-odd in the USA as a whole. It's not as though you're looking at a shortage, is it?


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 11:22 PM

Oh no. I meant Alabama was the most apt state to get said law passed for making minorities abort. It won’t be enforced but it would surely make its climb up to the Supreme Court where our great evangelical conservative justices will vote in favor so that Landover can have enough aborted fetuses for hell house. It’s necessary to get through so that white women can be scared into keeping their babies. It’s not just Alabama. Other states seem to like to follow Alabama’s example. Soon when roe v wade gets overturned (hopefully) there’ll surely be a shortage of fetuses. This proposal would balance it out so LBC can have its fetuses.


My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).
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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 05-30-2019, 11:32 PM

If marriage is seen as a sacrament..something set apart from what might otherwise have been (in this case carrying on like monkeys)..then surely God would provide a way to deal with the fruit of rejecting His plan which would be a tangible form of blasphemy.

What redress is available to the woman's owner in such a situation?

The Bible records everything important that we need to know about The Plan including that it's not likely to change any time soon. In different times and places, obviously, there are differing requirements such as the requirement to march around Jericho once a day blowing rams' horns for 6 days and 7 times on the 7th day Joshua 6:3-4. Jericho was an accursed city and all the babies in it were killed. All the children were killed, the young men and women, the adults and all the elderly. Only one person was spared. But when Jesus healed the blind man, there was no requirement to march around Jericho blowing horns for a week prior to the scales falling from his eyes. The requirement not to sin however is not specific to a time and place. The owner is commanded to act as follows:
Numbers 5:15-27 Then shall the man bring his wife unto the priest, and he shall bring her offering for her, the tenth part of an ephah of barley meal; he shall pour no oil upon it, nor put frankincense thereon; for it is an offering of jealousy, an offering of memorial, bringing iniquity to remembrance. And the priest shall bring her near, and set her before the LORD: And the priest shall take holy water in an earthen vessel; and of the dust that is in the floor of the tabernacle the priest shall take, and put it into the water: And the priest shall set the woman before the LORD, and uncover the woman's head, and put the offering of memorial in her hands, which is the jealousy offering: and the priest shall have in his hand the bitter water that causeth the curse:
Setting her before The LORD does not mean positioning her in front of an idol.
Making idols is an ongoing prohibition. Marital continence is an ongoing requirement.
And the priest shall charge her by an oath, and say unto the woman, If no man have lain with thee, and if thou hast not gone aside to uncleanness with another instead of thy husband, be thou free from this bitter water that causeth the curse: But if thou hast gone aside to another instead of thy husband, and if thou be defiled, and some man have lain with thee beside thine husband: Then the priest shall charge the woman with an oath of cursing, and the priest shall say unto the woman, The LORD make thee a curse and an oath among thy people, when the LORD doth make thy thigh to rot, and thy belly to swell; and this water that causeth the curse shall go into thy bowels, to make thy belly to swell, and thy thigh to rot: And the woman shall say, Amen, amen.
She already knows whether she is defiled, of course.
And the priest shall write these curses in a book, and he shall blot them out with the bitter water: And he shall cause the woman to drink the bitter water that causeth the curse: and the water that causeth the curse shall enter into her, and become bitter. Then the priest shall take the jealousy offering out of the woman's hand, and shall wave the offering before the LORD, and offer it upon the altar: And the priest shall take an handful of the offering, even the memorial thereof, and burn it upon the altar, and afterward shall cause the woman to drink the water. And when he hath made her to drink the water, then it shall come to pass, that, if she be defiled, and have done trespass against her husband, that the water that causeth the curse shall enter into her, and become bitter, and her belly shall swell, and her thigh shall rot: and the woman shall be a curse among her people.
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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 04:56 PM

tell me this is a joke. You guys seriously can't be this bad of human beings.
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Love Jesus Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 05:08 PM

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Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
tell me this is a joke. You guys seriously can't be this bad of human beings.

Quite the opposite, actually. We are children of the King of Kings, believers in every word and letter of the Holy Bible KJV 1611, and ONLY live life based on that Precious Guidebook. All else is folly.


On Christ, the Solid Rock we stand. All other ground is sinking sand; all other ground is sinking sand.


GLORY!


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Cross Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 05:19 PM

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Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
Quite the opposite, actually. We are children of the King of Kings, believers in every word and letter of the Holy Bible KJV 1611, and ONLY live life based on that Precious Guidebook. All else is folly.


On Christ, the Solid Rock we stand. All other ground is sinking sand; all other ground is sinking sand.


GLORY!
Amen, Brother! Glory be to God!


Scoutboy, if you have a problem with what we're saying, then you have a problem with Christ Jesus and His Holy Word, not with us, so take it up with Him. Fair warning though, He'll win. He always wins. Praise!


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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 06:50 PM

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Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
tell me this is a joke. You guys seriously can't be this bad of human beings.
I don't understand your definition of "bad." To me, "bad" means "ungodly behavior which has been condemned by the Holy Bible."

The Holy Bible is very clear on the subject of fetuses and infants whose mothers are heathens:

1 Samuel 15:3 Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and ass.

Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.

Hosea 13:16 Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up.

I pray that you abandon whatever wicked definition of "bad" you have imagined, and instead accept the Word of God as an infallible source of morality.
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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 09:21 PM

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Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
tell me this is a joke. You guys seriously can't be this bad of human beings.
Dear Miss Scoutman: That's a very interesting comment, and I thank you for that. The truth be known: we are a very caring group of believers who care about the eternal salvation or eternal damnation of every person who comes through the doors of at .

You see, we follow the -- all of it. We do not cherry-pick our favorite verses, nor do overlook the ones that we don't like. We know that Almighty is the author of this Great Book. It contains the truth that we need to know in order to be washed by the of the and to avoid spending enternity in . One of the verses that we cherish so much is this one, which describes the great love that the has for children:

John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

It is our hope that you, too, will find this everlasting life through the sacrifice that was made by the on Calvary's cross. God wants nobody to perish, as John 3:16 so clearly states, and that includes you.

Furthermore, I must explain that ALL of the Scriptural verses within the are ordained by the Almighty, as you will see here:

II Timothy 3:16 " All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness".

I hope I've been able to help you see that we are not "this bad of human beings". Truly, we do care. I shall remember you in my prayers.

A blessed day to you, dear Miss Scoutman,
Sincerely, Isabella W.




(Mrs.) Isabella White

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Default Re: Landover won’t be able to use unborn fetuses for hell house 2019 now? - 06-02-2019, 11:52 PM

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Originally Posted by Scoutman03 View Post
tell me this is a joke. You guys seriously can't be this bad of human beings.
Nonsense. Just because Alabama, Georgia, Missouri, and a host of other states will no longer perform their sacrifices to Satan doesn't mean Landover Baptist Church will be unprepared for Hell House this autumn, so calm down. Committee members know that other states are still vigorously defending Satan's Goal of collecting more souls in Hell than Christ collects in Heaven. The joke will be on Satan of course as Jesus is far more concerned with quality than quantity (Matthew 25:31-46). Besides, women of quality, and women who attract decent men will always have access to baby-killing clinics. Just because the poor, rural, uneducated strumpet doesn't have a sugar-daddy doesn't mean Landover Baptist Church will suffer Helloween Events.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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