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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

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Default Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-25-2010, 06:48 AM

THIS kind of this just gives normal Christians like us a bad name. While I work hard to maintain a trim, musclar pysique to please Jesus, not everyone does. I am certain that God does not want to look at the cellulite deposits on certain True Christian™ thighs (I won't name names, ladies ).

Quote:
Virginia church worships in the buff

Va. (KFSN) -- People who attend a church in Virginia don't have to worry about finding something to wear on Sundays because clothing is optional.

"I really don't think God cares what you wear when you worship," said one congregant Richard Foley.

Members at White Tail Chapel say they have no problem getting the word of god from a pastor in his birthday suit because they focus on worship.

The church's pastor also says Jesus was naked during some of his most important moments.

"When he was born he was naked, when he was crucified he was naked and when he arose he left his clothes in the tomb and he was naked. If God made us that way, how can that be wrong," the pastor of White Tail Chapel Allen Parker said.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-25-2010, 07:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I am certain that God does not want to look at the cellulite deposits on certain True Christian™ thighs (I won't name names, ladies ).
Oh course He doesn't. This is why all Ladies Of A Certain Age ought to shower, dress and undress in complete darkness.

The LORD finds nudity disgusting enough without being subjected to extraneous wobbly bits!


True Christians are Perfect!

Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.

Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.

For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-25-2010, 11:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
THIS kind of this just gives normal Christians like us a bad name. While I work hard to maintain a trim, musclar pysique to please Jesus, not everyone does. I am certain that God does not want to look at the cellulite deposits on certain True Christian™ thighs (I won't name names, ladies ).
Wow they did a news story on them on our local station just today. They are national news.

I gotta say I don't wanna see it.
When I go to church I am properly dressed. Yes believe it or not this Feminazi wheres a dress. It is a sin to wear pants to church.
For ladies I mean. Not saying for men not to wear them like this guy.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 12:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
Wow they did a news story on them on our local station just today. They are national news.

I gotta say I don't wanna see it.
When I go to church I am properly dressed. Yes believe it or not this Feminazi wheres a dress. It is a sin to wear pants to church.
For ladies I mean. Not saying for men not to wear them like this guy.
Yes, but do you do as God commands and COVER YOUR HAIR when you are in church?!

http://biblicaltopics.blogspot.com/2...veiled-at.html

1 Corinthians 11: 4Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.
5But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.
6For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.
7For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.
8For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man.
9Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 12:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
Wow they did a news story on them on our local station just today. They are national news.

I gotta say I don't wanna see it.
When I go to church I am properly dressed. Yes believe it or not this Feminazi wheres a dress. It is a sin to wear pants to church.
For ladies I mean. Not saying for men not to wear them like this guy.
It's a sin for ladies to wear pants anytime.

Doesn't your husband beat you for that?


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 07:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
When I go to church I am properly dressed. Yes believe it or not this Feminazi wheres a dress. It is a sin to wear pants to church.
For ladies I mean. Not saying for men not to wear them like this guy.




Drama queen
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 11:00 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BelieverInGod View Post


Very good believer.

Here's another
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 11:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
It's a sin for ladies to wear pants anytime.

Doesn't your husband beat you for that?
You forget I divorced the wife beater.

The man I am with now treats me with respect and as an equal.
He likes my jeans.
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TrueJuggaloMaMa is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.TrueJuggaloMaMa is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.TrueJuggaloMaMa is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-26-2010, 11:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heathen_Basher View Post
Yes, but do you do as God commands and COVER YOUR HAIR when you are in church?!

http://biblicaltopics.blogspot.com/2...veiled-at.html

1 Corinthians 11: 4Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.
5But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven.
6For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.
7For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.
8For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man.
9Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.

No I don't My hair is pinned back modestly.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 01:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
You forget I divorced the wife beater.

The man I am with now treats me with respect and as an equal.
He likes my jeans.
Woman equal? It says right in the KJV bible, Ephesians 5:22
Quote:
"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord"
. You wear dungarees? I refer you to deuteronomy 22:5
Quote:
"The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman's garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God"
. If you was my wife, we would definitly have a little discussion


Give a man a fish and he can eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he can sit in a boat drinking beer all day while you fool around with his old lady.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 01:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
You forget I divorced the wife beater.

The man I am with now treats me with respect and as an equal.
He likes my jeans.
Matthew 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Mark 10:12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.
Luke 16:18 Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.


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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 01:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BelieverInGod View Post
Matthew 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Mark 10:12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.
Luke 16:18 Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery.

Yea you keep putting up these verses. I get it I am comitting adultry. At least I am alive. Do you honsetly believe that if a man beats his wife to death she deserved it. No matter what sins the man was commiting at the time.
When I meet my maker I will ask for forgivness of my sins and will not deny that I have commited any. It will then be up to him to forgive me or cast me out.

Oh to your question before if I'm a man because I considred what he wanted Homosexual sex. Since I have to spell it out for you he wanted to commit sodomy.

Thinking you are perfect, and sinless is also a sin.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
Oh to your question before if I'm a man because I considred what he wanted Homosexual sex. Since I have to spell it out for you he wanted to commit sodomy.
You are still being elusive dear. Sodomy is a fairly broad term.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dictionary.com
sodomy sod·om·y (sŏd'ə-mē)n.

1. Anal copulation of one male with another.

2. Anal or oral copulation with a member of the opposite sex.

3. Copulation with an animal.
So, did this Insane Clown Pervert you chose to marry want to have sex with men, animals, or did he wish to place his member in your mouth or your backside?


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Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:11 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HellboundGreaser View Post
Woman equal? It says right in the KJV bible, Ephesians 5:22 . You wear dungarees? I refer you to deuteronomy 22:5 . If you was my wife, we would definitly have a little discussion
Well thank god I am not your wife.

Dear TrueJuggaloMaMa,

You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church Forums.

Reason: Attempting to force the homersexural lifestyle on GOD's favorite forum
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We will NOT tolerate you trying to turn men into sissy sodomites!

I am not turning men into sodomites it was a joke. Uptight are we.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
You are still being elusive dear. Sodomy is a fairly broad term.



So, did this Insane Clown Pervert you chose to marry want to have sex with men, animals, or did he wish to place his member in your mouth or your backside?
since I have to spell it out for you the latter. God really you guys didn't get that.

BTW he is NOT a Juggalo, He is Catholic. And no I am not cCatholic. Cantrary to what they say I did not convert as I was told I was suppossed to do.
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
The man I am with now treats me with respect and as an equal.

He likes my jeans.
If that's you in your avatar picture, I bet your jeans are enormous!

Your fornicator boyfriend probably wants to use them for a pup tent!




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God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
If that's you in your avatar picture, I bet your jeans are enormous!

Your fornicator boyfriend probably wants to use them for a pup tent!

Oh really fat jokes so funny. That doesn't bother me either
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TrueJuggaloMaMa View Post
since I have to spell it out for you the latter. God really you guys didn't get that.

BTW he is NOT a Juggalo, He is Catholic. And no I am not cCatholic. Cantrary to what they say I did not convert as I was told I was suppossed to do.
Catholics all seem to have a penchant for buggery, but their normal targets are small boys. I had never heard of a Catholic buggerist that was attracted to larger posteriored women.

It was good that you denied him that particular perversion, as God does not look kindly on those that use bodily orifices incorrectly. The digestive system is a one-way system. The rectum should be considered as nothing but an exit.


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Rogers View Post
This is why all Ladies ...ought to shower ...in complete darkness.
There is something very appealing about this image, but you have to be careful that your woman isn't pleasuring herself in the shower.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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TrueJuggaloMaMa TrueJuggaloMaMa is offline
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Default Re: Naked Christian Cult Embarrasses Jesus - 02-27-2010, 03:34 AM

[QUOTE]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
Catholics all seem to have a penchant for buggery, but their normal targets are small boys. I had never heard of a Catholic buggerist that was attracted to larger posteriored women.
Not that it matters I was alot thinner than. I am sure not every woman in your religion is thin. Being heavy is not my dream but I deal with it and work at losing weight.

Quote:
It was good that you denied him that particular perversion, as God does not look kindly on those that use bodily orifices incorrectly. The digestive system is a one-way system. The rectum should be considered as nothing but an exit.
Thank you. I agree with you. Especially on that last part.
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