Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed! |
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 05:23 AM
Brothers in Christ, it's come to THIS. The liberal feminazis and bulldykes have gained such a foothold in America now (thanks to Obama!), that our penises have started to shrink! They are causing the FEMINIZATION of America (a sin!), and are the main reason we are pulling out of Iraquistan! Thank you Rush Limbaugh for raising this important issue.
Quote:
Limbaugh: Penises now ’10 percent smaller’ and shrinking because of ‘feminazis’
Rush Limbaugh on Thursday lashed out at feminists — who he called “feminazis” — over the news that male genitalia are shrinking.
The conservative radio host pointed to an Italian study which found that the average male penis was 10 percent smaller than 50 years ago. Researchers cited weight gain around the waist, smoking, stress and environmental pollutants as factors.
But Limbaugh wasn’t buying that explanation.
“I think it’s feminism,” he declared. “If it’s tied to the last 50 years — the average size of [a male's] member is 10 percent smaller than 50 years — it has to be the feminazis, the chickification and everything else.”
“Give ‘em time and they’ll blame Bush. But air pollution vs. feminazis? Ha!”
In 2009, Limbaugh worried that the Center for Disease Control was considering a proposal to encourage circumcision for all baby boys.
“If we need to save our penises from anybody, it’s Obama,” he said at the time.
In other possibly unrelated penis news, IO9 reported on Thursday that doctors have been recently struggling with how to treat Koro Syndrome, which is the irrational “fear that the genitals are shrinking, or retracting into the body, and that when they finally do disappear, you will die.”
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Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 06:14 AM
I have had Koro syndrome for many years now, and I can attest that it is a fatal disease. If doctors new how to treat it, they would pray for the extension of my prime member. Think of the converse, when a man's anus becomes smaller due to the lack of fear of penile girth. This will result in difficulty during elimination, which will result in atheism, due to the heightened stimulation during anal sex, as a result of the tighter anus. How can you justify giving gay men a tighter anus? This will only lead to more enjoyment during sodomy, and therefore more sodomy. There is no way Obama's gay army will be able to endure this transformation.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 609
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Forrest Park, Memphis
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 02:07 PM
Koro syndrome is not an "irrational fear". Feminazis is using the FDA to control the world's food supply, and will poison the food with endocrinotoxins that cause the penis to shrink and retract. As "10% shorter" equals a 27.1% decrease in volume, they are already 27 percent done.
1-(0.9^3) = 0.271 = 27.1%
The Swiss feminazi Christine Schürrer (or maybe Gudrun Schyman, who cares) did actually propose centralized food distribution a few years ago in order to "liberate women from unpaid housekeeping duties".
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 03:05 PM
I haven't been using my penis ever since my wife became obsolete. And I am sure it has shrunk ever since. And that's not all. The letters in my newspaper keep getting smaller and smaller as well!
I am not surprised once more Obama is to blame for all this. If his wife would be silent and bear lots of children, her hips are clearly wide enough, none of this would have happened. And I am certain all the ink they save by making those newspaper letters smaller and smaller is used by terrorists to attack America.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 05:32 PM
"Penises now ’10 percent smaller’"
This is excellent news: God measures your holiness by your penis length.
I’m sure that the perceptive will see that God curses and marks out His Enemies and the unholy with unwieldy members!
Eze:23:7: Thus she committed her whoredoms with them, with all them that were the chosen men of Assyria, and with all on whom she doted: with all their idols she defiled herself.
…
Eze:23:17: And the Babylonians came to her into the bed of love, and they defiled her with their whoredom, and she was polluted with them, and her mind was alienated from them.
…
Eze:23:19: Yet she multiplied her whoredoms, in calling to remembrance the days of her youth, wherein she had played the harlot in the land of Egypt.
Eze:23:20: For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses.
And so we see that, as America moves closer to God, the sign will be a shrinkage in the mark of Satan until something more modest (but functional) and Godly is achieved for us all!
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 08:50 PM
That explains some things. Many men outside of the feminazi-free community of Freehold have small baby-batter nozzles, as I have been reliably informed.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,364
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 08:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
I have had Koro syndrome for many years now, and I can attest that it is a fatal disease. If doctors new how to treat it, they would pray for the extension of my prime member. Think of the converse, when a man's anus becomes smaller due to the lack of fear of penile girth. This will result in difficulty during elimination, which will result in atheism, due to the heightened stimulation during anal sex, as a result of the tighter anus. How can you justify giving gay men a tighter anus? This will only lead to more enjoyment during sodomy, and therefore more sodomy. There is no way Obama's gay army will be able to endure this transformation.
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That is one of the most disgusting things i ever read, damn how disgusting and perverse that gay people, especially gay males, are
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Honorary True Christian™
Forum Member
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Posts: 13,993
Join Date: May 2008
Location: North Salem, Indiana
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
09-21-2012, 09:40 PM
This makes sudden sense.
I have learned, in the course of my truck stop ministry, that nearly every sodomite is "well-hung", claiming 7-9", if not more. (You'd be amazed at what people confess when they finally come to Jesus.)
What do sodomites avoid? Feminazis. The only people who see their penises are other sodomites, who love penises more than Jesus! So of course they "grow".
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 4
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Same place as always
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
01-09-2013, 04:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
I haven't been using my penis ever since my wife became obsolete. And I am sure it has shrunk ever since. And that's not all. The letters in my newspaper keep getting smaller and smaller as well!
I am not surprised once more Obama is to blame for all this. If his wife would be silent and bear lots of children, her hips are clearly wide enough, none of this would have happened. And I am certain all the ink they save by making those newspaper letters smaller and smaller is used by terrorists to attack America.
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Your being sarcastic right
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Feminazis Cause Penis Shrinkage! -
01-09-2013, 04:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Onthedot
Your being sarcastic right
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Please make a thread of your own in the " Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.
And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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