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Question New Venue required for All-Candidates Debate - 06-18-2019, 01:26 AM

As you may have heard, the first all-candidates debate had to be cancelled to overcrowding, as during the rehearsal the security detail concluded that trampling was a serious threat. The Freehold Aerial Survey estimated the crowd number to be "somewhere between the medium to high multitudes, with a low chance of being the mob predicted by Revelation 7:9".

No members of the public were in danger, as the crowd consisted solely of candidates.

Thanks be to Mayor Hold for being such an inspirational figure that everybody wants to be a mayor just like him. And thanks be for the freak clerical error that gave him a ten-year term of office, because these election things sure are a nuisance.

Anyway, top considerations for the new debate venue are:
  • Freehold Baptismal Beach and/or sewage treatment facility overflow area, with the incumbents podium at the former lifeguard's chair and the challengers in the shallow end/effluent runoff (depending on rainfall).
  • Leviticus Lake Slaughterhouse: The podium for the Incumbent will be in the office, with the challengers in the freezer unit. There will be a special place for vegan candidates in the stick pit, which Freehold Foods promises will be drained.
  • David's Gun Range. All 12 of the local gun clubs promise that the challengers podiums will have no live fire, assuming current wind conditions remain unchanged
More to be announced, nominations are welcomed.
 

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