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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 09-22-2019, 02:23 AM



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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-19-2019, 04:17 PM

I learned this one at the convent ---

what do you call a hermaphrodite with a fused poopie-hole and vajayjay profusely bleeding?

a semi-colon followed by a period.
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-19-2019, 08:50 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily Brent View Post
I learned this one at the convent ---

what do you call a hermaphrodite with a fused poopie-hole and vajayjay profusely bleeding?

a semi-colon followed by a period.
Dear above! Miss Brent, I don't think that that "joke" is appropriate for . I must remind you that this is a family-oriented site, and we do strive to bring honor and praise to the in all that we do here at .

Perhaps, in future, you can post jokes that do not involve "potty" humor, such as this nice, clean joke:

Q: Why were Gentiles created? A: Somebody has to pay retail.

Sincerely, Isabella W.


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Angry Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-19-2019, 11:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isabella White View Post
Dear above! Miss Brent, I don't think that that "joke" is appropriate for . I must remind you that this is a family-oriented site, and we do strive to bring honor and praise to the in all that we do here at .

Perhaps, in future, you can post jokes that do not involve "potty" humor, such as this nice, clean joke:
AMEN! I don't know how these gutter-mouthed degenerates keep finding this Godly forum! They sorely need to be reminded of Ephesians 4:29!


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Lightbulb Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-19-2019, 11:06 PM

What do altar boys have in common with light bulbs?

Priests love screwing in the new ones.


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-20-2019, 12:20 AM

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and asks for a beer. The bartender brings a beer and notices the parrot on his shoulder and says, "Hey that's really neat. Where did you get it?" The parrot responds, "In the jungle, there's millions of them."


Psalm 62:5-7 KJV
My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation: he is my defence;
I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.
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Jesus Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-27-2019, 04:05 PM

This may be old but I just heard it at church today.

A terrorist, a rapist, and a pedophile go into a bar. Bartender says “Hi Mohammed!”



Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 10-27-2019, 11:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
This may be old but I just heard it at church today.

A terrorist, a rapist, and a pedophile go into a bar. Bartender says “Hi Mohammed!”

Oh, my, that is a funny one, dearest Great-Grandbaby Brother Larry! How you've made me giggle titteringly. And here is one that I do so hope you will enjoy, as well:

Q: What's the difference between a Mooselim and a vampire?
A: At some point the vampire will stop being bloodthirsty.

A blessed evening to you, Dear,
Lovingly, Granny Isabella


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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-06-2019, 02:27 AM

I'll try again at a joke

What did the Queen say to the negro pianist in the ballroom?


" Oh good, we need a little colour in this room"
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African Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-06-2019, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily Brent View Post
I'll try again at a joke

What did the Queen say to the negro pianist in the ballroom?


" Oh good, we need a little colour in this room"
That's what Meghan Monkey and the quadroon prince are for.


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-07-2019, 07:20 AM

Man: Why are the corners of the house so damp?
Woman: Because I am angle-licking (Anglican)

Man: Why?


Woman: It's better than carpet munching!
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-12-2019, 05:45 AM

My funny bone has been a bit stale lately - does anyone have a good Jewish joke?
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Grammar Nazi Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-14-2019, 03:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily Brent View Post
My funny bone has been a bit stale lately - does anyone have a good Jewish joke?
18 whole pages of them right here, which you would've found if you'd bothered to look instead of asking for a handout like a fat negress.


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-14-2019, 03:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes View Post
18 whole pages of them right here, which you would've found if you'd bothered to look instead of asking for a handout like a fat negress.
Pardon me, dear. Old eyes.
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-19-2019, 08:40 PM

What is the Cathilic priests preferred type of brothel?



An orphanage.
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 12-25-2019, 06:30 PM

What's the Pastor's favorite car?
A convertible.


No joke.
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Default Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes - 02-13-2020, 06:09 AM

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor went to check on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl. "Oh, yes" she replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter!" The pastor fainted.


-Ps 25:10 All the paths of the LORD are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant and his testimonies.
-Ps 33:4 For the word of the LORD is right; and all his works are done in truth.
-James 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.
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