PRAYER REQUESTS Please check regularly |
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 05:41 AM
I'll be a bit perturbed if my duffel is mildewed. Just saying.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 05:57 AM
So this is what it's come to? Christians doubting Christians?
I feel I've been very patient with all of you, but even my patience has its limits.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 06:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
So this is what it's come to? Christians doubting Christians?
I feel I've been very patient with all of you, but even my patience has its limits.
|
Calm down, Brother, everything will be fine.
I'll buy another duffel.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 06:24 AM
I'm sorry Des, you're right. Just because some people might not be living up to my idea of having faith, that's no excuse for me to get hot under the collar.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 08:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
I feel certain you will hear from dear Miss Cookie very soon.
|
When is very soon? Christmas next year?
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 09:48 AM
Right now, Mr. Farmer, God is giving you a chance to demonstrate to us all exactly how much faith you're capable of showing.
I urge you not to further squander this opportunity.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 11:25 AM
Mr Machine, It was a simple question I thought. Not so simple that all is required is a yes or no, but simple nevertheless. I really can't understand why you are sensitive to this issue
I'm getting rather tired of caring for her feline. My dog is very keen on the idea of fresh cat meat for dinner. There is a limit to his and my patience.
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 58
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: South America (I know you hate it, but I don't care)
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 11:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson
Please join me in a 12 hour prayer vigil in our prayer closets for the safe return of Mistress Cookie, and all the money, time, and belongings Brother Des spent on getting her. While we haven't heard anything from her, I'm worried about our dear Mistress Cookie, and I hope that she will be back in Landover, where she belongs, NOT outside in the climate!!! She needs to be with godly people who can heal her there and help her (Dr. Niles is the first that comes to mind). Faith Machine, if you see this, please ensure she returns safely to Freehold within the next 24 hours, so additional damage to her frail health (the outdoors is not good for a lady's health -- she was meant to be indoors, cooking and cleaning) will be minimal! Remember Matthew 7:7 "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:"
Yours in Christ,
Elizabeth
|
Maybe she ran away, to save herself from people like you... besides, if you want she to go back to Freehold, why you don't go and seek her? Instead of asking God to do your job do something by yourselves!
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-22-2014, 11:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunsetShimmer
Maybe she ran away, to save herself from people like you... besides, if you want she to go back to Freehold, why you don't go and seek her? Instead of asking God to do your job do something by yourselves!
|
That's kind of a weird post, Javiera, as Miss Cookie is right here with me, and eagerly looking forward to our return to Freehold. We're just enjoying the sights as we take a lazy, scenic route back home.
You might not be able to relate to the concept of "enjoying the sights," since there's not much to look at in your country, but I assure you, it's glorious.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
Gushing for Jesus
|
|
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 12:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
That's kind of a weird post, Javiera, as Miss Cookie is right here with me, and eagerly looking forward to our return to Freehold. We're just enjoying the sights as we take a lazy, scenic route back home.
You might not be able to relate to the concept of "enjoying the sights," since there's not much to look at in your country, but I assure you, it's glorious.
|
Tell her I say Hi! And please let her know she doesn't need to pay me back right away for having her garden tended to and the hot tub repaired when she was gone. Mr. Etheldreda's "Pray-athon For Cookie's Return" hosted at her home was not the source of the damage to her rose garden or marble statue of Bacchus. Don't listen to what anyone else says. Besides, I was happy to do it, and I know she'll pay me back soon.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,984
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 12:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
marble statue of Bacchus.
|
Oh dear, a false God?
Could it be that its presence on Cookie's property was the reason for all her troubles?
I hate to suggest such a thing, but is it possible the Lord was angry with her, and temporarily removed His hand of protection?
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
Gushing for Jesus
|
|
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 12:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
Oh dear, a false God?
Could it be that its presence on Cookie's property was the reason for all her troubles?
I hate to suggest such a thing, but is it possible the Lord was angry with her, and temporarily removed His hand of protection?
|
I'm sure I don't have any idea.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 12:24 AM
So sorry, Cookie
|
|
Obese Swedish Meatball Delusional Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 2,207
Join Date: May 2014
Location: On a mountain with a tree and a midgit
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 12:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jim Farmer
So sorry, Cookie
|
That´s really sweet If it were to be she would make an excellent mother
Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.
Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 01:02 AM
Are you talking about my dog? I don't know that Deuteronomy 28:53 applies to dogs!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 05:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunsetShimmer
Maybe she ran away, to save herself from people like you... besides, if you want she to go back to Freehold, why you don't go and seek her? Instead of asking God to do your job do something by yourselves!
|
My Christian ladylike patience is being tested by the bashing of you unsaved heathens! If she is to save herself, she is to lose her soul! "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it." Matthew 16:25. It's really not that hard! She is a True Christian lady and a platinum tither, which means she truly believes in Jesus and ALL of His commands!
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 58
Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: South America (I know you hate it, but I don't care)
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 05:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson
My Christian ladylike patience is being tested by the bashing of you unsaved heathens! If she is to save herself, she is to lose her soul! "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it." Matthew 16:25. It's really not that hard! She is a True Christian lady and a platinum tither, which means she truly believes in Jesus and ALL of His commands!
|
What's the point of being alive if you don't protect yourself from danger? And this place is very dangerous... or it would be, if Landover would let me to join her!
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 05:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunsetShimmer
And this place is very dangerous... or it would be, if Landover would let me to join her!
|
Security!!! Terrorist threat!!!
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: MAGA Country, USA
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 06:01 AM
SunsetJavelina, please stop sending me pictures of yourself. I've already told you that I'm not interested.
Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 1,330
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: In the kitchen
|
|
Re: Please Pray for Mistress Cookie -
12-23-2014, 06:59 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Des
SunsetJavelina, please stop sending me pictures of yourself. I've already told you that I'm not interested.
|
How perverted is she? taking her skirt off in public and then sitting in such a position!??! 1 Corinthians 6:19 She is just asking to be raped by some ugly thug in the park, at this hour. What a slut! And then look at the bile -- I'm willing to say that because of her pagan ways, she'll try to eat it! Proverbs 26:11 And then she stares it publicly. What a slut, and thanks for exposing her to the rest of the world, what she really is.
"Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands." Proverbs 14:1
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|