Focus on Family - Christian Parenting A place where parents can get good Godly advice on how to raise a family: how to properly administer corporal punishment, which movies to avoid, and more! |
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Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-29-2016, 08:26 AM
When my mom would get out of line especially when "Aunt Flo" would show up my dad would get really annoyed with her. He'd have to smack her around a little bit to get her to straighten out and fly right.
Sometimes he'd send her to the guest room and take care of business.
My question is, when the husband is placed in the position when he has to apply corporal punishment to an unruly wife should he do it in front of the kids?
"AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals. To oppose it would be like an Israelite jumping in the Red Sea to save one of Pharaoh's charioteers ... AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals." Dr Jerry Falwell
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-29-2016, 06:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sword Of Christ
When my mom would get out of line especially when "Aunt Flo" would show up my dad would get really annoyed with her. He'd have to smack her around a little bit to get her to straighten out and fly right.
Sometimes he'd send her to the guest room and take care of business.
My question is, when the husband is placed in the position when he has to apply corporal punishment to an unruly wife should he do it in front of the kids?
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I think that the children can learn a great deal from witnessing this sort of behavior. They will learn basic methodology, of course, as in how hard to hit, how many blows to land, and the proper prayerful attitude to assume before administering the discipline.
The absolutely best way to go about it, though, is the open the Bible immediately afterwards and highlight the appropriate passages so the children understand the spiritual justification for the father's actions. You can't get more Christian than that.
Plainly Yours,
Handmaiden
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-29-2016, 07:01 PM
I agree that the children must witness everything that is part of family life. It is the job of the parents to raise up responsible citizens and teach the youth the things they need to know. It may be a small detail, but I believe it is important to know such things as when to apply discipline, what discipline is appropriate, how many blows for what offense and what instruments may be used. Should a club be used, or is a belt sufficient? These details are taught through observation, much as language, gestures and so on.
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
01-16-2020, 05:25 PM
Is there a venue where someone as knowledgeable as yourself could teach and mentor husbands the details of proper punishments? I feel these should be learned correctly by the husband before passing this on to children.
Thank you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss
I agree that the children must witness everything that is part of family life. It is the job of the parents to raise up responsible citizens and teach the youth the things they need to know. It may be a small detail, but I believe it is important to know such things as when to apply discipline, what discipline is appropriate, how many blows for what offense and what instruments may be used. Should a club be used, or is a belt sufficient? These details are taught through observation, much as language, gestures and so on.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 12:53 AM
It's great to do it in front of the kids. It will teach the boys what to do when they're wives act up in the future, and the girls will learn lessons on husband submission.
God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 09:22 AM
I felt that he did the right thing at the time.
My father believes that women should not wear slacks because slack can stimulate their female parts so mom never wore anything but a skirt or a dress. Often he'd raise her dress and take a belt to her legs and sometimes the cord from the coffee percolator.
He left many a welt on her.
"AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals. To oppose it would be like an Israelite jumping in the Red Sea to save one of Pharaoh's charioteers ... AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals." Dr Jerry Falwell
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 05:18 PM
Women shouldn't wear pants, as said in Deuteronomy 22:5
God is about as real as unicorns and dragons.
Revelation 12:9
Job 39:9
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 09:25 PM
I'm a bit surprised by the question! Not only is it important for the children to learn the fundamentals of spousal discipline, but more important is the way that this kind of instructional love is administered. See, kids may mistakenly see such a thrashing as an act of violence. This is particularly true if correction is done behind closed doors, as though it is shameful or unclean. It is the exact opposite, of course.
There is nothing wrong with physical suffering being visited upon a deserving wife. But the good husband must moderate his instruction to inflict righteous pain but not damage or impair the woman's ability to attend to her daily chores. That would be counter productive and would teach the sons in the family to waste valuable assets.
Remember: Our Lord suffered to save us all. Just as His suffering was a glorious and valuable tool for our Redemption, so too a wife's suffering can be an agent for positive growth and development of a Good Family in Christ.
On a personal note, I do not enjoy pain. When I scald myself boiling the clothes or if a spark from the stove lands on my skin, I cry out and wish it never happened.
But when my late husband, who is now with Christ, used to whip me, it made me feel exhausted, even rapturous. The harder the strokes the more I knew he loved me and wanted me to be a Better Wife. He never hid the practice from our children. Why should he? Indeed, he would gather us all together and ask the youngest present to do the counting of the strokes. So, it was a learning experience for everyone. He helped my daughters the same way. That's important.
As the practice was normally done while the recipient of the instruction was wearing no attire, it afforded an opportunity for the whole family to see the various stages of physical development. Just before his passing, my husband allowed our oldest son to administer seven strokes to me. At first he was ambivalent but by stroke three and four, his hand was just as strong as my husband's.
Also, the Good Husband can demonstrate which parts of the body ought not be touched by the instrument. His favorite instrument was one he and the boys made in his workshop. It was a loop-whip made of coated wire. The handle was an old tennis racquet. He would explain to the boys that the parts of the female body that eat or process food and drink are off limits, as were my breasts during breast feeding months.
Out oldest girl, our precious princess, was always in charge of hooking and then unhooking my handcuffs to the ceiling hook. She loved this almost as much as she loved to put the star on the top of the tree at Christmas time. She will made some man a very loving and obedient wife! Being borderline anorexic, she's not expensive to feed as well. A real bargain, that girl is.
Never forget that the Good Teachings of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ are words and thoughts to live by, but it was His Suffering that Saved us!
My son told his father that he really enjoyed "using the wire on Mom, particularly her front part," and wanted to know if he could do it after church the following Sunday. My Good Husband reminded him not to take pleasure in the infliction of suffering upon others and that using the wire would only be appropriate if I had broken a family rule of some kind. Otherwise, we must never punish the innocent. But he assured the boy he had first dibs the next time the need arose. Education is so important!
Proverbs17:26 To punish the just is not good.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 09:53 PM
I posted a reply, could not find the edit button to fix spelling errors, was told that it was too boring to read so it was (in under five minutes, deleted, and now I can't find the terminate my membership button.
Bye.
Y'all enjoy your site. LOL
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 10:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenKraft
I posted a reply, could not find the edit button to fix spelling errors, was told that it was too boring to read so it was (in under five minutes), deleted, and now I can't find the button to terminate my membership / account / whatever.
Y'all enjoy your site. LOL
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So now the question is: How do I cancel my membership? I see nothing indicating that.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 10:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenKraft
So now the question is: How do I cancel my membership? I see nothing indicating that.
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I am confused, dear. I thought you wrote an interesting reply to an interesting question, but it appears you didn't get all the pomp and circumstance you had expected. Now it appears as if you want to take your toys and leave our humble little sandbox, as the kids say. I can't imagine why. If your intent is to fellowship with us, then by all means, you are welcome to do so! We wish nothing more than to welcome you to the chorus of Brothers and Sisters who sing the praises of Jesus and share the Good News that He will send all sinners and unbelievers to Hell for all eternity!
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 10:50 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenKraft
I posted a reply, could not find the edit button to fix spelling errors, was told that it was too boring to read so it was (in under five minutes, deleted, and now I can't find the terminate my membership button.
Bye.
Y'all enjoy your site. LOL
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I deeply apologize for being so unresponsive to your clearly very important needs.
You see, dear, there is one thing lacking in your boring lengthy post: Scripture.
There are so many beautiful verses which could and should be mentioned in a discussion such as this, for example:
Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
Proverbs 20:30 The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.
Hebrews 12:11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
Praise for giving us such detailed instructions on how to live!
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-30-2016, 11:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenKraft
As the practice was normally done while the recipient of the instruction was wearing no attire, it afforded an opportunity for the whole family to see the various stages of physical development. Just before his passing, my husband allowed our oldest son to administer seven strokes to me. At first he was ambivalent but by stroke three and four, his hand was just as strong as my husband's. . . . Husband can demonstrate which parts of the body ought not be touched by the instrument. . . He would explain to the boys that the parts of the female body that eat or process food and drink are off limits, as were my breasts during breast feeding months. . . My son told his father that he really enjoyed "using the wire on Mom, particularly her front part," and wanted to know if he could do it after church the following Sunday.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Basilissa
You see, dear, there is one thing lacking in your boring lengthy post: Scripture.
There are so many beautiful verses which could and should be mentioned in a discussion such as this, for example:
Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
Proverbs 20:30 The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.
Hebrews 12:11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
Praise for giving us such detailed instructions on how to live!
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As usual, you have the right of it, Sister Basilissa. It just seems sad that this woman's husband, who displays at least some sense of responsibility vis a vis the issue of family discipline, doesn't seemed to have found time to impart very much Scriptural knowledge to his household.
One strong indication of a lack of regard for Biblical injunction relates to the sections of the woman's post which I have bolded. It is clear from her narrative that the entire family saw their mother in a state of undress. This is in direct disobedience to God's Word in Leviticus, chapter 18, verse 7.
The nakedness of thy father, or the nakedness of thy mother, shalt thou not uncover: she is thy mother; thou shalt not uncover her nakedness.
Indeed, there are are slew of verses in that particular chapter that make it very clear that family members are NOT supposed to see each other au natural. Countless Bible verses support the value of corporal punishment, but nudity is just not on!
Another matter of concern is allowing a son to beat his mother. There are no Bible verses to support this disturbing behavior. It's wrong for the father to shirk his own responsibilities in such a way. Furthermore, the boy needs to understand that he must wait until such time as he has his own wife before being afforded such authority.
Frankly, this family sounds like the sort of false Christians who give Jesus a bad name.
Wholesomely Yours,
Handmaiden
His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-31-2016, 01:47 AM
Luke 12:47 And that servant [slave], which knew his lord's will, and prepared not himself, neither did according to his will, shall be beaten with many stripes."
Since the husband is head of the wife like Christ is the head of the church and just as the church is there to serve God the wife is there to serve the husband. The wife is a slave to the husband.
Ephesians 5:23 For the husband is head of the wife even as Christ is head of the church:
1 Timothy 5:3 For if a man know not how to rule his one house, how shall he take care of the church of God?
Some women know their place and others don't. I've also heard it said that wild colts make the best horses. Perhaps when I select my wife I should select a spirited and willful one and beat her into submission and use her strong will to work for our Lord?
As much as I hate them, the Mooselimbs do know how to treat their wives.
"AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals. To oppose it would be like an Israelite jumping in the Red Sea to save one of Pharaoh's charioteers ... AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals." Dr Jerry Falwell
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-31-2016, 07:01 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden
The nakedness of thy father, or the nakedness of thy mother, shalt thou not uncover: she is thy mother; thou shalt not uncover her nakedness.
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Oh please! I'm still paying for my ancestor Ham seeing Noah naked! Thousands of years later, I still have to serve white people forever because this happened once!
Have this people not yet realized that the wrath of God is REAL, and everlasting?
And they call themselves Christians?
As for the original topic, the Bible is very flexible in HOW to discipline your family. If is not forbidden, it is permited, so you can discipline your wife in front of the family, the neighbors, or in live TV. JUST NOT NAKED IN FRONT OF THE KIDS.
But be aware that in some places, to discipline your wife with physical force is against secular law. And we have to obey the law. So you have to do it without leaving any mark that can be traced by criminal police, and in a manner that a jury of your peers cannot find you guilty beyond any reasonable doubt.
I guess the best place to discipline your wife would be the middle east. No one is going around asking questions if your wife is black and blue all over.
1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
02-28-2019, 10:13 PM
I am widowed and miss my husband very much...we did not have an y children. I must admit that I do miss the discipline he gave me often and from his loving heart.
When he felt it was needed, he believed in the proven old fashioned spanking! Bare bottom and he would begin with his hand and finish with his belt.
After it was always caresses, holding me and talking in his soft tender voice. Oh how I miss that!
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
02-28-2019, 11:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostandalone
I am widowed and miss my husband very much...we did not have an y children.
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I hope it's not too late for you to get married again and have some children, for the sake of your immortal soul!
1 Timothy 2:15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-02-2019, 08:45 AM
DearBrother`s and Sister`s in Christ,
Three yearsago brother “Sword of Christ” asked a question that I feel is very interesting:
“when thehusband is placed in the position when he has to apply corporal punishment toan unruly wife should he do it in front of the kids?”
I know thatI join the conversation very late, but I think the question is so interestingand important that I would like to write something about it anyway.
As I seeit, the question can be divided into three parts: 1) should the children KNOWthat daddy is spanking mommy? 2) Should the children HEAR when daddy isspanking mommy? And 3) should the children SEE daddy spank mommy?
As I seeit, the children should definitely know that daddy spanks mommy. To try to keepit a secret from the children is not very practical, but especially it is likelying to the children. A parent should always be honest to his/her children. Besides,children are smart and figure things out, so I do not think that the parentscould keep it a secret for very long anyway. Perhaps what is most important, isthat trying to keep it a secret is like the parents should be ashamed of their ChristianDomestic Discipline lifestyle. A life style that I personally feel is naturaland as God intended.
So, thechildren should know that daddy spanks mommy, but should they hear thespankings? Yes, I think they should. To be open about daddy spanking mommy, butthen only do it when the children are not at home makes it seem like theparents consider the discipline as something wrong and dirty. So, I see nothingwrong in the children hearing the smacking and cracking sounds as daddies hand,belt, hairbrush, paddle, cane, switch or what ever other tool he uses lands onmommies bare buttocks mixed with mommies screams, howling and crying.
But shouldthe children only hear daddy spank mommy and never see him do it? Of course notevery spanking has to happen openly in front of the children. Sometimes thespankings can happen in the privacy of the parent`s bedroom, but I see nothingwrong in some of the spankings also taking place also in front of the children.After all, in a Christian Domestic Discipline family spanking should be anormal form of discipline that doesn`t have to be hidden from other familymembers.
As SisterHandmaiden said:
“I thinkthat the children can learn a great deal from witnessing this sort of behavior.They will learn basic methodology, of course, as in how hard to hit, how manyblows to land, and the proper prayerful attitude to assume before administeringthe discipline.”
I agreewith Sister Handmaiden. The parents task is to prepare the children for theirroles as adults, so in a Christian Domestic Discipline family it is animportant part of the upbringing to introduce the children to the disciplinepart of a marriage.
Like SisterAnne Sayne says:
“It's greatto do it in front of the kids. It will teach the boys what to do when they'rewives act up in the future, and the girls will learn lessons on husbandsubmission.”
Yes, Iagree fully. It shows the sons what their role will be as future husbands andfathers and it shows the daughters that they are never too old for properdiscipline. That can be a good and valuable lesson for the daughters,especially when they are in their teenage years.
SincerelyYours,
Sister KirsiK
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Re: Christian Domestic Discipline: Should The Husband Discipline His Wife In front of the Kids? -
10-03-2019, 05:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KirsiK
DearBrother`s and Sister`s in Christ ... random babbling ..
SincerelyYours,
Sister KirsiK
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Dear Miss Kirsik: I would like to welcome you to . But, somehow or another, you have managed to bypass our Introduction Forum, which is where we like all of our newcomers to visit when they arrive here. The link is here:
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Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.
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