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Default How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 12:25 PM

I would like to get this badge, because I love having sexual intercourse with my wife nightly. I believe that should be the requirements, are there any more requirements?
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 01:46 PM

Since you're not a True Christian™ or even a Forum Member, you chances are slim to none.


"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
John 8:32
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 01:49 PM

OH, How do I become a true christian?
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 01:52 PM

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Originally Posted by thetruthhurts View Post
OH, How do I become a true christian?
Devote you life to Jesus. Read and follow the laws of God, you can find them in the KJV1611. Tithe, and tithe until it hurts.
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 01:55 PM

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Originally Posted by Helge Fossmo View Post
Since you're not a True Christian™ or even a Forum Member, you chances are slim to none.
So the fact that I have a wife and a son does not constitute True Heterosexual badge?
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 02:40 PM

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Originally Posted by thetruthhurts View Post
So the fact that I have a wife and a son does not constitute True Heterosexual badge?
No.




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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 05:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by thetruthhurts View Post
I would like to get this badge, because I love having sexual intercourse with my wife nightly.
Quote:
Originally Posted by thetruthhurts View Post
So the fact that I have a wife and a son does not constitute True Heterosexual badge?
Are you for real? Women are only fertile 3 days out of 28. So all those other attempts to create little boy soldiers for Christ are an absolute waste. You spill your seed on infertile ground (see Genesis 38:8-10) and God says he will kill you for that.


2 Chronicles 7:14
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land Australia.
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 05:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Charli View Post
Are you for real? Women are only fertile 3 days out of 28. So all those other attempts to create little boy soldiers for Christ are an absolute waste. You spill your seed on infertile ground (see Genesis 38:8-10) and God says he will kill you for that.

SISTER you are in the MEN'S forum again. Do I need to remind you about this, or shall I place a call to your father?
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-07-2010, 05:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Dewitt View Post
SISTER you are in the MEN'S forum again. Do I need to remind you about this, or shall I place a call to your father?
Oooooooops. Not again.

Just as well the welts on my butt have healed from the last time Daddy found me wandering in here.

It's OK Mr Dewitt. I am always honest with Daddy and will confess and take my punishment.

Yes .... I know .... a willow branch, not a twig!

I praise Jesus that Daddy loves me enough to discipline me.

Proverbs 13:24 (King James Version)

24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.


2 Chronicles 7:14
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land Australia.
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-10-2010, 08:26 PM

Now that we've shooed the lady out of here, let's get back to the basics:


Quote:
Originally Posted by thetruthhurts View Post
So the fact that I have a wife and a son does not constitute True Heterosexual badge?
In your first post you said you were banging having nightly intercourse with your wife. And now you tell us you have only one son.

It strikes me you shoot a lot of blanks.

Scientific studies have proven time and time again that a man that can't keep his six gun loaded and shooting the real stuff, has a deeply ingrained revulsion of the target of his affection.

Such men are repressed homers.

And that's why you won't get "True Heterosexual" recognition here.





Now, before you try to get all cute and wonder why I don't have that badge, it's because I have something much better: The "Punched the Most Queers" badge.


The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

"Credo elvem etiam vivere"
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 08:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HTannor View Post
Now, before you try to get all cute and wonder why I don't have that badge, it's because I have something much better: The "Punched the Most Queers" badge.
I have punched more queers than I have had hot dinners - I should have this badge as I feel I have earned it.

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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 09:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Colin Cameron View Post
I have punched more queers than I have had hot dinners - I should have this badge as I feel I have earned it.

As Unsaved Trash with 49 posts and red reputation, I'd be careful in asking for any badges. You might earn one you don't particularly care for...


Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 09:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Harold Porter View Post
As Unsaved Trash with 49 posts and red reputation, I'd be careful in asking for any badges. You might earn one you don't particularly care for...
Ive also stopped masturbatig on a regulart basis too. Perhaps this is another badge I should have.

I dont ask for much, I think a badge would be nice.
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 09:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Colin Cameron View Post
I dont ask for much, I think a badge would be nice.
As far as I can see, you've already got two...


"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
John 8:32
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Angry Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 10:18 PM

No one likes a beggar.



Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 10:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Colin Cameron View Post

I dont ask for much, I think a badge would be nice.
Ask and ye shall receive. I have granted you two badges which I felt were most appropriate for you.



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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-28-2010, 11:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Colin Cameron View Post
I have punched more queers than I have had hot dinners - I should have this badge as I feel I have earned it.

I think that being a faggot yourself disaqualifies you.


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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-29-2010, 12:11 AM

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Originally Posted by Colin Cameron View Post
I have punched more queers than I have had hot dinners - I should have this badge as I feel I have earned it.

We are quite aware of what the words "punched" and "hot dinner" mean in gay code friend. Nice try homo but Christ is smarter than that.



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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-29-2010, 12:45 AM

You ought to be more concerned about getting salvation from JESUS than medals from us.



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Default Re: How do you get the True Heterosexual Badge - 08-29-2010, 03:15 AM

Being a true child of GOD, I've never had the opportunity to lay with womankind; and have, additionally, never spilled my sacred seed upon the foul dirt - in accordance to the judicial statutes of MOSES' judicial laws, and the highly effective and successful Faith-Based conservative abstinence method.

Unfortunately, this leaves me at an impasse, as the Apostle Paul expressly forbade sex, before marriage; and for some irreducibly complex reason, the fervent passion and veracity of my sermon hasn't awarded me the attentions of any womankind...

I fear that, to earn the rites of True Heterosexuality on this BLESSED forum, I'd need to succumb to temptations and inflict my loins upon a female...

Does this make me, not a hetero, but ahetero? By not multiplying children in GOD's name, am I no better than a raping, murdering atheist? Please help!

Is it time to panic?
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