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HALLOWEEN = HELLOWEEN A seasonal forum to NOT celebrate Satan's birthday.

 
 
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-16-2015, 03:30 PM

I give kids who are dressed up only one KJV bible verse(and a paddlin)


anyone who isnt dressed up gets the entire bible and how to join the L.O.B Church and be saved
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-17-2015, 04:58 AM

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Originally Posted by Ph0enix808 View Post
I give kids who are dressed up only one KJV bible verse(and a paddlin)


anyone who isnt dressed up gets the entire bible and how to join the L.O.B Church and be saved
I do not condone helping create a generation of socialist Welfare leeches, so they get nothing at my gate (Yes, gate. Those nose-picking mendicants are not getting near my house.) until they earn it.

So they dressed up. Well la de dah! Guess what, brats, I get dressed every single day!

Nosiree, if those punks want a treat from me, they have to stand in front of the gate security cams and act out a Biblical scene. If they do a good job of it I use a drone to drop a piece of candy. A bad job of it and I use another drone to dispense a CS gas cloud.

One time with the old choke & puke gas and those beggars learn to perform better next year.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-18-2015, 05:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jim C. Lombardo View Post
For Jesusween when the kids to our trailer, my wife is going give the kids horse liver and kidney beans and proclaim it to be the body and kidney stones our your Lord and Savior and you better not pull any tricks and throw 'em in the bushes!
JESUSWEEN really seems like a great Idea!
One could but still think about the possible betterment by calling it VATICAWEEN or CATHOLWEEN, so that the Holy Stool in Rome would be honored also!
I think I will, if the little Runts come to my door demanding for sweets, give out to them HOLY CATHOLIC EUCHARISTS Instead.
And who knows; If DURING CATHOLWEEN NIGHT a very sweet little boy should knock all alone on my door I might even invite him in to teach him about the true CHRISTIAN LOVE that resides in the heart of a CATHOLIC PRIEST.


Ex 20:4-5 Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth. Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the Lord thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me; <--- That includes Mary
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-05-2017, 08:10 PM

The only appropriate Helloween decorations for a True Christian™!









Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-08-2017, 03:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
The only appropriate Helloween decorations for a True Christian™!









Mmmm, I'll be there's plenty of Jesusweenie behind that door.
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-05-2020, 09:05 PM

Well, at least I know what my kids will be dressed up like this year.

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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-06-2020, 03:44 AM

Call me old school, but for me, it's just not Oct. 31 without a trip to the Hell House.


Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for Vice President in 2024
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-06-2020, 05:18 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WWJDnow View Post
Call me old school, but for me, it's just not Oct. 31 without a trip to the Hell House.
I’ve always wanted to visit Freehold’s hell house every October but I am always denied entry at the town lines. They never say why but I suspect some bad apples always try to enter Freehold and it’s just a basic precaution. You have to applaud that attention to safety they have where you live.
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-07-2020, 04:58 AM

https://www.chick.com/halloween/2019

Some witnessing ideas here, from last year. Do these have endorsement from The Pastors?
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Skull Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-10-2020, 09:05 PM

October 31 should be seen as a good day. On that day Martin Luther (perhaps the last godly German) left the Satanic Catholic Church and declared that we must follow the Bible and nothing else. He lead the path for the Authorized King James Bible which would come nearly a century leader.


Ecclesiastes 5:3b "A fool's voice is known by multitude of words."
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-17-2020, 07:21 PM

Anyone else planning to take down carved-up pumpkins on October 31? As many of you know, the pumpkins are part of an old Celtic pagan tradition where druids made human sacrifices for their gods (read: demons) and "compensated" each victim's family by leaving them a pumpkin with a monster's face carved on it. I think it's alarming and frustrating that many "Christian" families are ignorant of this fact and unknowingly continue to honor these primitive superstitious pagan customs that we should have destroyed ages ago.
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Scared Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-17-2020, 11:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harvey View Post
an old Celtic pagan tradition where druids made human sacrifices for their gods (read: demons) and "compensated" each victim's family by leaving them a pumpkin with a monster's face carved on it.
Probably an improvement from the "Druids" I've seen (read: Goths, EMO's, EDM hooligans, Juggalos, Hippies, none of whom would know a real druid if it fell out the sky and landed on their head) but otherwise Eew!!! no I didn't know that it's revolting
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Default Re: Jesusween Is Almost Here! - 10-20-2020, 01:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
Probably an improvement from the "Druids" I've seen (read: Goths, EMO's, EDM hooligans, Juggalos, Hippies, none of whom would know a real druid if it fell out the sky and landed on their head) but otherwise Eew!!! no I didn't know that it's revolting
We had some "Druids" out here in Podunk last Helloween. They had built a large wicker man and they were going to fill it with Christian children to burn alive as a sacrifice to their heathen gods. Of course, when the fellas and I stood our ground and carried out the Lord's will (Deuteronomy 12:3), those punk teenagers claimed they were just having a bonfire "like at Burning Man." Well, it burned all right, and we no longer have an infestation of Satanists (Exodus 22:18).


 

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