The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Introduction -
05-30-2015, 09:55 AM
Hello, Gay Wolf, I must admit I'm a bit confused about this werewolf business of yours. I thought that stuff was make-believe. We only believe in things that are real here.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
Unsaved trash, obese perverted retard
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 20
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Introduction -
05-30-2015, 06:43 PM
As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.
I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8
|
|
Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
|
|
Posts: 14,451
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
|
|
Re: Introduction -
05-30-2015, 06:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
...I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit...
|
Sorry, kid, we're full up on the "crazy" here.
|
|
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
|
|
Re: Introduction -
05-30-2015, 07:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.
|
Boy, you already have the body of THE apex predator ordained by God to have dominion over the animals and plants.
Why would you want to fool around, turning into a Hellbound doggy and baying at the moon and whatever else it is you imagine werewolves doing when you could be out there in the woods with your hunting and fishing license as God intended?
This is what apex predators looks like:
(Note that the dog is submissive to them. I'm sure being submissive is no problem for you, though. Queer.)
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
|
|
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
|
|
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Introduction -
05-30-2015, 10:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.
|
Quote:
Isaiah 8:19 And when they shall say unto you, Seek unto them that have familiar spirits, and unto wizards that peep, and that mutter: should not a people seek unto their God? for the living to the dead?
|
You are in deep doo-doo son. I can't wait for the day Jesus gets ahold of you. He'll sort you out alright.
Quote:
Leviticus 20:27 A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.
|
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
|
|
Unsaved trash, obese perverted retard
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 20
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 04:02 AM
Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..
I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8
|
|
Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
|
|
Posts: 14,451
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 04:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..
|
And a life expectancy in the wild of maybe 10 years, tops, followed by being cannibalized by your pack as soon as one of them senses any weakness.
Great plan you got there, bud.
Do you often get picked on in school?
|
|
Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
|
|
Posts: 10,328
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 04:44 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much
And a life expectancy in the wild of maybe 10 years, tops, followed by being cannibalized by your pack as soon as one of them senses any weakness.
Great plan you got there, bud.
Do you often get picked on in school?
|
Verily, Mr. Much. Even an atheist understands that this person has the romantic but unrealistic view of the lupine existence as most teenagers do.
Why would we be forced to discard clothing? God gave us things to wear (Genesis 3:21) and He also made the first weapon (Genesis 3:24), gave us cities (Genesis 4:17) to protect us and dwelling-places, such as tents (Genesis 4:20)! These things are our birthright. Why should we give them up?
As for wolves, Mr. Much gave you a decent view into the sorry state of their life choices. If I may, I'd also like to add that the wolf pack is ruled by the alpha female. She is the one who chooses those who will have breeding privileges and who will eat first. As a sodomite male, the chances of you becoming her favorite are quite small. As the other male wolves are presumable straight, we can also assume that it is going to be hard to find other partners in fornication, either. Or perhaps you are aspiring to become a Steppenwolf? A lonely wanderer howling at the full Moon? In that case you won't have the pack and your chances of catching any charismatic megafauna are nil. You powers of magnificent mastication will be wasted on small rodents or half-rotten carcasses.
It is your choice, of course, if you find a suitable demon capable of performing this black sorcery on your being. I choose to be the Image of God, of Jesus!
Genesis 1:27
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
That is what mature adults do. They recognize the facts of the Bible and the privileges of human existence dictated by Jesus even after the vile first harlot woman caused the Fall!
Here we can see God Creating Adam.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 68
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Ministering on a float
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 05:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
Take away the clothes,the guns,kill off the dog,and a human is as vulnerable as a newborn animal with little chance of survival. If another creature doesn't smite them first, then the elements will surely kill them. A wolf has the body for survival,with a coat to brave the harshest winters,legs and claws to tread though the toughest terrain, and teeth and a bite force strong enough to break the bones of other animals,large or small..
|
Your argument is idiotic. The good Lord blessed us with all of those things and brains to make them work for us. Take away a shark's teeth or a lion's teeth and claws and you'd have a right kitten.
EDIT: Distinguished Professor White, I see you said what was on my mind even more eloquently and biblical than I. I know our kids are in the hands of a great man while at the Landover Baptist university campus.
Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 51
Join Date: May 2015
Location: I know how to use a Central Belt
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 05:48 PM
Although I am not the polished Bible scholar like may of the sage pastors, I may have uncovered something.
Matthew 7:15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves.
The above scripture suggests to me that this fagwolf is not only a delusional teenage pervert, but has inadvertently admitted to being a false prophet.
Matthew 24:11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many.
Well he hasn't deceived me!
Matthew 24:12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.
I for one, am not prepared to risk my love wax getting cold so I'm keeping well clear!
Numbers 10:9 And if ye go to war in your land against the enemy that oppresseth you, then ye shall blow an alarm with the trumpets; and ye shall be remembered before the LORD your God, and ye shall be saved from your enemies.
|
|
True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
|
|
Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-01-2015, 08:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
Mrs. Johnson,your attempts to frighten me into a state of repentance are lackadaisical, as well as futile. Hell, a James Hutchins gave a more graphic and detailed threat as to what would happen to me, yet I spat at him and shrugged his words aside.
|
Friend, you should save all that spit in a jar, you'll want to use it to cool your flesh as you roast in Hell.
Laugh all you want at Jesus. Just think for a moment. What if, what if you are wrong and we are right. Is all of eternity worth agamble. Think about it. If you are lucky, you'll live on Earth for 90 years. Then spend untold THOUSANDS in Hell. Is the scant 90 years worth wasting in comparison?
Back in the 'Nam, young privates would 'dip into' the local 'B' girls and soon have their minds ravaged by sexual demons. Sure, prayer cured them but the months of agony followed by the years of shame along with the often deformed children God bestowed on them as a reminder of their foolishness. do you think it was worth it?
Would you drink Drano if you were thirsty or would you rather go to God?
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
|
|
Serving Jesus
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-02-2015, 02:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.
|
I have sent a lengthy, officious and intelligent sounding letter to the Security and Investigations Ministry, with the suggestion that you be captured and brought to the Freehold Institute for Applied Biblical Studies, that you may be examined.
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
|
|
Unsaved trash, obese perverted retard
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 20
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-02-2015, 04:56 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss
I have sent a lengthy, officious and intelligent sounding letter to the Security and Investigations Ministry, with the suggestion that you be captured and brought to the Freehold Institute for Applied Biblical Studies, that you may be examined.
|
Oh? And what exactly does this "institute" do exactly?
I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8
|
|
Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
|
|
Posts: 14,451
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-02-2015, 06:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
Oh? And what exactly does this "institute" do exactly?
|
I'd expect that first up would be to determine whether you actually have a soul that can be Saved™. With you being a werewolf, that doesn't look promising.
If they determine you do have a soul, the next step would be a determination of your annual income (and expected tithing level), and delegation of your case to a team of Pastoral Researchers Increasing Christian Knowledge (or "P.R.I.C.K.®"s). These gentlemen would be in charge of whatever exorcism they could get your family to pay for determine is necessary to assist in your Salvation™.
If no soul is found, various poking and prodding to determine where you fit in a baraminological framework, and surgeries (probably amateurishly done and very painful) to remove whatever samples as would be required for evaluation.
Finally, vivisection (for research purposes; you're not anti-science, are you?) and then taxidermic mounting for display in the Landover Baptist University Creation Science Museum (or Zeke's den, possibly).
Since you are "no longer human", you have, of course, forfeited your rights as a US citizen, so any appeals will fall on deaf ears.
|
|
Unsaved trash, obese perverted retard
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 20
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Riding the short bus to hellfire
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-03-2015, 04:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much
I'd expect that first up would be to determine whether you actually have a soul that can be Saved™. With you being a werewolf, that doesn't look promising.
If they determine you do have a soul, the next step would be a determination of your annual income (and expected tithing level), and delegation of your case to a team of Pastoral Researchers Increasing Christian Knowledge (or "P.R.I.C.K.®"s). These gentlemen would be in charge of whatever exorcism they could get your family to pay for determine is necessary to assist in your Salvation™.
If no soul is found, various poking and prodding to determine where you fit in a baraminological framework, and surgeries (probably amateurishly done and very painful) to remove whatever samples as would be required for evaluation.
Finally, vivisection (for research purposes; you're not anti-science, are you?) and then taxidermic mounting for display in the Landover Baptist University Creation Science Museum (or Zeke's den, possibly).
Since you are "no longer human", you have, of course, forfeited your rights as a US citizen, so any appeals will fall on deaf ears.
|
Yeah . . . Good luck with that, bro :v
I will punish ... all such as are clothed with strange apparel. -- Zephaniah 1:8
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 30
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Hooterville, MI and surrounded by heretics & apostates (liberal Christian/Dutch Reformers)
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-04-2015, 11:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
As I have said before, it is only a metaphor for now. I am truly only a werewolf in mind and in spirit. I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college, while in my own time, I will be studying and performing different methods of "dark" magic in hopes of bridging the gaps between the two and to attain the body of an apex predator.
|
Greetings fellow wretched sinner, FagWolf!
I was reading through your introductory posts and in my newly cleansed heart, Jesus told me to assure you that even in you present condition, although a wretched sinner and a self-professed buggerist, there is hope for even one such as you.
I've gone Straight-4-Jesus since hanging around these ! I hate sin and that old me, so I've crucified that old self (Galatians 2:20) and with in me, I get a new life to live! You can too! Now I'm praying and searching God's chosen, Landover Baptist© women for any potential obedient, Christ-like, bride-to-be.
Just get saved!
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=67449
Confess publicly that you're a sinner (1 John 1:9), and invite Jesus to come inside you. That's what I did. Now, I'm studying sermons and church teachings, reading other posts, and trying to get involved. So, I'm just trying to follow God's Word and testify to the other wretched sinners!
"Only let your conversation be as it becometh the Gospel of Christ: that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that ye stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the Faith of the Gospel; And in nothing terrified by your adversaries: which is to them an evident token of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that of God. 29For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on Him, but also to suffer for His sake; Having the same conflict which ye saw in me, and now hear to be in me." (Philipians 1:27-30) If I may, I would make a suggestion ... consider cutting all that hair! (1 Corinthians 11:14)
Now, when you're solid in the Word, there were some pretty radical Nazarites who were set aside for the in the old testament who were permitted to look "rough" for , (Numbers 6:5) In my mind, the Duck Dynasty Patriarchy and Christian role models probably resemble those Nazarites pretty closely. I'm not really sure, because I just went Straight-4-Jesus myself.
Even John, the original Landover Baptist©, was known for his "fuzzy" appearances (Matthew 3:4). But I would certainly pray and talk to God's anointed professional Landover Baptist© ministry team and seek pastoral counseling from other s about that notion.
I may be wrong, but it does give you a few questions to talk about with other s.
Yours in Christ,
James, a fellow wretched sinner and now Straight-4-Jesus©!
"... And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name. Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is Six hundred threescore and six." (Revelation 13:17-18)
|
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jun 2015
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-05-2015, 12:04 AM
hI..thanks for letting me in this site..I m a baptist true believer in Christ..
|
|
Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
|
|
Posts: 14,451
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-05-2015, 12:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by mary27
hI..thanks for letting me in this site..I m a baptist true believer in Christ..
|
Hmmm... most Baptists I've encountered were sufficiently beaten corrected during their home schooling to actually acquire passable grammar.
Maybe you can explain your father's failures in your own intro thread. Please be sure to follow the instructions cleverly hidden at the top of every page in this subforum.
|
|
Unsaved trash, some kind of fag
|
|
Posts: 584
Join Date: Jan 2012
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-05-2015, 02:42 AM
Hi! Good to see you here! There's a few weirds but I'm sure you'll spot them, no probs! This:
Quote:
Originally Posted by FagWolf
I am however studying various sources to become one physically. This coming semester, I will be studying human anatomy and physiology at college
|
Why would you do that if you want to be a wolf?
Proverbs 20:23 Divers weights are an abomination unto the LORD; and a false balance is not good.
|
|
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
|
|
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Introduction -
06-05-2015, 03:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by mary27
hI..thanks for letting me in this site..I m a baptist true believer in Christ..
|
Please make a thread of your own in the " Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.
And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.
I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|