[BrotherLarry]

A True Christian™ soon tires of the sin and sordidity of the metropolis known as New York City. Oh, sure, the hustle and bustle is exciting. If it's to be found anywhere, chances are NYC has it. Some of the richest people reside here and scattered among them are genuine followers of Jesus such as myself, trying to find my way to glory when Jesus breaks the clouds that fine day. But I grow fatigued of the blatant hatred this town has for all things holy.


I was eavesdropping on a conversation on the N Train today as I often do (in a polite, reverent way) between two middle aged women. One had just shown the other a photo of her eldest daughter and said, "She's had two abortions, you know." The other woman gasped and said, "TWO? How many didn't she tell you about?" The first retorted with "Probably hundreds." They acted like this was funny. I wanted to shout out, "So your daughter is a WHORE and KILLS her precious UNBORN BABIES and you LAUGH?" But I sat there, saying a silent prayer for them.


A couple of stops later a young boy(?) gets on the train wearing pink eye shadow and skin tight pants - with a halter top. It's winter here, folks. I wasn't surprised to see he was carrying a handbag with a rainbow embroidered on the front. He tried to make eye contact with me and moved closer but I averted my stare and prepared to rebuke him in Jesus' Name if he persisted. Still more stress that is commonplace here.


I don't have to tell you that there are many perversions found here and all of them spit in the face of the Blessed Savior. I have pretty much made up my mind to move to somewhere more Christ-like but I need advice from the brethren and sisters who know. Remember I want to continue to reach the homer population and I simply must live somewhere with decent shopping and nightlife. Here is my short list of potential residences:


1. Los Angeles CA
2. San Francisco CA
3. Chicago IL
4. Provincetown MA
5. Key West, FL
6. Dallas, TX
7. Freehold, IA
8. La Paz, Bolivia
9. Barcelona, Spain
10. Podunk, NE


I have listed them in no particular order. Money is not an object; being able to live among Christian folk and not witness sin and corruption is. Pray with me and for me as I contemplate this move.

[Basilissa]

I am lifting my prayers, Brother. I will continue praying for you if you do decide to move to La Paz. It's a beautiful city with just a single minor problem: due to high altitude, there is almost no air to breathe, so I will pray for you as you inevitably face hypoxia. On the bright side, you can clearly see the air, as it has a dirty yellow hue due to dust particles and other sources of pollution.

[MitzaLizalor]

Originally Posted by BrotherLarry

1. Los Angeles CA

This is definitely a place to avoid. I've noticed a distinct lack of ethics but there are some quite pleasant areas. One day you meet someone and they seem nice, friendly, happy to show you things and so on. Then the next time you see them they're overclocking like mad with wild hair and eyeballs, you'd hardly credit they were the same person! But there can only be so many people with insane twins on the loose.

[Dr. Anthony J. Toole]

Brother, it is easy to rule out several places immediately:

1. Los Angeles CA TRAFFIC
2. San Francisco CA THE BIG ONE
3. Chicago IL POLAR VORTEX
4. Provincetown MA
5. Key West, FL HURRICAINES
6. Dallas, TX SUMMER
7. Freehold, IA
8. La Paz, Bolivia SH*THOLE COUNTRY
9. Barcelona, Spain TOURISTS
10. Podunk, NE

That should narrow it down.

[Dennis Lukes]

Dr. Toole makes a good point. However, I do believe he's being a bit soft on these horrid cities, some of which are modern Sodoms and Gomorrahs.

Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole

Brother, it is easy to rule out several places immediately:

1. Los Angeles CA TRAFFIC, SMOG, SCIENTOLOGISTS, JEWS
2. San Francisco CA THE BIG ONE, AIDS
3. Chicago IL POLAR VORTEX, GANG VIOLENCE
4. Provincetown MA LOBSTERS
5. Key West, FL HURRICANES, CUBAN DRUG SMUGGLERS
6. Dallas, TX SUMMER
7. Freehold, IA
8. La Paz, Bolivia SH*THOLE COUNTRY, VENOMOUS SNAKES
9. Barcelona, Spain TOURISTS, CATALONIAN SEPARATIST VIOLENCE
10. Podunk, NE

That should narrow it down.

And as far as Freehold and Podunk are concerned, there are no gays whatsoever, so you wouldn't be able to proselytize to them.