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Reload this Page Greetings family.
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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Default Re: Greetings family. - 10-19-2015, 09:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by YouRaiseMeUp View Post
I try to give AT LEAST a minimum of $200 for offerings.
Did your education not go very well?

Quote:
Originally Posted by YouRaiseMeUp View Post
I try to give AT LEAST
There, I fixed that for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by YouRaiseMeUp View Post
I will not make the mistake of calling you by your first name, Ms.
Ms? How very liberal of you. I think the courtesy you are trying to offer is "Sister Joanna" Although this would imply that you have truly been accepted by God. As we still have not been told which Church you belong to, it is hard to come to any real conclusion. Also, as you seem to be somewhat confused about your sex, I fear that you could possibly be Asexual. This wouldn't do at all.

Quote:
Originally Posted by YouRaiseMeUp View Post
I am not sure how the treatment of gays are around here
I think In know what you are trying to get at here. If you mean Gay as in

Poop pusher
Homofaggot
Poop pipe smoker
Knob jockey
Girlyboy
Iron hoof
Donut muncher
Gym queen
Pissy queen
Bear
Pussy puncher
Bentshot
Bum robber
Butt fruit
Celesbian
Botty boy
Bumhole engineer
Rice queen
Uphill gardener
Iron hoofter
Pansy
Gaysian
Gym Bunny
Poof
Salsa queen
Pooff
Batty boy
Cocknocker
Donut puncher
Queen
Brownie queen
Potato queen
Poove
Finocchio
Todger dodger
Woofter
Woolie woofter
Flamer
Leso
Scat queen
Bean flicker
Nancy
Pillow biter
Pooftah
Muff Diver
Turd burglar
Fairy
Woolly
Backgammon player
Kitty puncher
Lesbo
Chi chi man
Bufty
Flit
Mary
Harry hoofter
Arse bandit
Cock knocker
Butt pirate
Sausage jockey
Nellie
Cockknocker
Curry queen
Nancy boy
Flower
Light in the loafers
Fudge packer
The Game of Flats
Butt rustler
Drag queen
Twink
Shit stabber
Bone smuggler
Fag
Marmite miner
Dinge queen
Vin Diesel dyke
Crafty butcher
Lesser
Brown piper
Bugger
Bum-driller
Bum boy
Poofter
Anal assassin
Cockpipe cosmonaut
Fruit
Fruit loop
Shirt lifter
Bum chum
Jobby jabber
Puff
Butch
Grey queen
Brownie king
Lezzie
Bean queen
Bun bandit
Chutney ferret
Faggot
Mattress muncher
Bum bandit
Fruit packer
Pouf
Bent
Taco queen
Back door bandit
Butt rider
Lezzer
Oklahomo
Sod
Cock jockey
Upstairs gardener
Ring raider
Chicken queen
Dyke
Butt pilot
Drag dyke
Bufter
Carpet muncher
Limp wristed
Light in the pants

Then the answer is, we don't treat them to anything. If you are referring to "happy people" we invite them enthusiastically.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
I'm confused. It was a woman and is now a man?
Yes. It's all very confusing and quite alarming really. I fear we may have another Lefty to contend with.


Ecclesiastes 1:18 - For in much wisedome is much griefe: and hee that increaseth knowledge, increaseth sorrow.


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Default Re: Greetings family. - 10-19-2015, 10:16 PM

Welcome, sir. What shall we call you? Your introduction is somewhat sparse. What is your congregation? Who is your Pastor? What city do you live in or near, or do you live a more bucolic lifestyle out in the country? Describe your armaments. Tell us your story.

And what is this talk about perverts?


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: Greetings family. - 10-19-2015, 10:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that Ms. was a typo. Because only a feminazi lesbian would even write Ms. And you have assured us that you are not one of those.

But (sorry to go on about it) you still haven't told us what church you attend. It is, actually, one of the things you are instructed to tell us at the top of the page, dear.
Not a typo, you just look a lot younger than your age

I go to High Shepard in California.
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Default Re: Greetings family. - 10-20-2015, 12:13 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by YouRaiseMeUp View Post
I go to High Shepard in California.
Your answer is very vague. California is an enormous country, it could be anywhere. Plus the name sounds like a hippie "church". Is clothing optional at your "church"?


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in 2016

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Default Re: Greetings family. - 10-20-2015, 11:56 PM

Madam "Raise me Up",

How confusing this is. First, you display the traits of the weaker s-e-x and then you porpoise to be a man? While I confess to being somewhat easily confusalated (due to my papist roots, no doubt), I have red, American blood in my venal cavities, so I can recognize a regular guy when I see one. That is not the vision you've provided me, so I am cautious about welcoming you to God's favorite forums.

You see, those of us who have long visited this oasis of God's presence on the interwebs have faced hypocriticalism and falsity of faith in abundant measurings. Thankfully, our dedicated department of Faith provides us with most details about the posters here that are necessary to make a judgment of character. I await their decision as to whether or not your journey with the good people of Landover is a long one or will be cut off, just as God will separate the wheat from the chaff come the Glory. PRAISE HIS NAME.

It's very clear on the banner: unsaved unwelcome.

COME, LORD JESUS!
BrotherLarry

PS: Is the name of your congregation truly "shepard?" This is odd, since our LORD GOD is the shepherd of souls, not "shepard." Just one more thing that brings me pause in my welcome to you, miss. Put down the eyebrow pencil and pick up a King James Bible. Hell awaits those whose vanity takes up more time than prayer.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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