Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Landover Today! > Pastor Zeke's News Wire
Reload this Page I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to
Pastor Zeke's News Wire Keep up to date with an ever-changing world from an even more Godlier perspective than FOX News.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Bro Izzy's Avatar
Bro Izzy Bro Izzy is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™
 
Posts: 161
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Fighting sinners in NW Englandistan
Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-26-2008, 11:21 PM

A 56-year-old man from the Midwestern US state of Wisconsin has been arrested after shooting his lawn mower in his garden because it would not start.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7526628.stm

Perhaps he thought it was possessed or turned catlick


Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Talitha's Avatar
Talitha Talitha is offline
Deaconess
Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Long service medal, 3rd class Real American™ Gunfest '08 Cleanest Kitchen Platinum Tither True Christian Lady True Christian Provider™ award Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Ex-Brit True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Long service medal, 2nd class Early riser Touched by Jesus Donald Trump 2016! Pastor Ezekiel Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-26-2008, 11:34 PM

I just clicked on the Link.
What a fine looking man he is.
I don't know about shooting my Lawnmower, but my Messican Gardener.............



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-26-2008, 11:50 PM

God Bless America! I thank Jesus each and every day that I live in a country where a man can shoot his lawnmower if it needs shooting. You can't do that if you live in Iraquistan, now can you!

I say again, GOD BLESS AMERICA and GOD BLESS THE NRA!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Old Iron Crotch's Avatar
Old Iron Crotch Old Iron Crotch is offline
SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
Forum Member
 
Posts: 3,054
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Right here, right now
Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Old Iron Crotch is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 01:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bro Izzy View Post
A 56-year-old man from the Midwestern US state of Wisconsin has been arrested after shooting his lawn mower in his garden because it would not start.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/7526628.stm

Perhaps he thought it was possessed or turned catlick
He wasn't charged because he shot his lawnmower per se, but because sawed-off shotguns are illegal and he was disturbing the peace. The charges would have been the same if he had shot his weed-whacker or his leaf-blower.


Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 01:21 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tidal wave of warm spit View Post
He wasn't charged because he shot his lawnmower per se, but because sawed-off shotguns are illegal and he was disturbing the peace. The charges would have been the same if he had shot his weed-whacker or his leaf-blower.
Or a witch.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Nobar King's Avatar
Nobar King Nobar King is offline
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
Christ's Guardian
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '07 Christian Love Tin Tither Real American™ Cleanest Kitchen Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Hotrodder Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian True Christian Nerd TC Bravery Ex-liberal Ex-Christ-Killer Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 5 Years Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life 20,000 posts Eats the Most Pork True Republican Divorcee Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Grammar Nazi Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Cup of Jesus Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 02:18 AM

I just renewed my NRA membership. And, I re-loaded my gun.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Brother Enoch's Avatar
Brother Enoch Brother Enoch is offline
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™

True Christian™ Ex-Mary Worshipper Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Saved 1 Year One Year/1000 posts Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Tin Tither Tell her once Porn Resistant Pro-Life Persecuted Flat Earth Eats the Most Pork Honorary Ex-Eskimo True Republican Anti-sodomy

 
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 03:03 AM

Quote:

A local retailer said that Mr Walendowski might now have difficulty getting his lawn mower repaired. "Anything not factory recommended would void the warranty," said Dick Wagner, of Wagner's Garden Mart in Milwaukee.
I hate warranty Nazis!
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
VictoryOS's Avatar
VictoryOS VictoryOS is offline
True Christian™ Beauty Queen
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Beauty True Christian Lady True Christian Homemaker True Heterosexual™ Best Pie Tin Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Eats the Most Pork Christian Love Victory Over Sex True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Kirk Cameron Fan Club Paula Deen Negro Support Group Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Roper Crossburn Trumpette Home Schooled Saved 5 Years 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Long service medal, 3rd class Trump of GOD Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus GLORY Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 5,447
Join Date: Dec 2007
VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 03:05 AM

What a man does with his gun is his own business.


Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
in 2016

Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Brother Enoch's Avatar
Brother Enoch Brother Enoch is offline
The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
True Christian™

True Christian™ Ex-Mary Worshipper Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Saved 1 Year One Year/1000 posts Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Tin Tither Tell her once Porn Resistant Pro-Life Persecuted Flat Earth Eats the Most Pork Honorary Ex-Eskimo True Republican Anti-sodomy

 
Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Enoch will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 04:05 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
What a man does with his gun is his own business.
I polish mine. Repeatedly, one might say obsessively.

Sometimes I let my wife polish it, but she doesn't do it quite right. I usually have to redo it shortly after she's done.

I once had to have the inside of the barrel cleaned. Can't say I enjoyed that much.
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 04:29 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Avatar View Post
I polish mine. Repeatedly, one might say obsessively.

Sometimes I let my wife polish it, but she doesn't do it quite right. I usually have to redo it shortly after she's done.

I once had to have the inside of the barrel cleaned. Can't say I enjoyed that much.
Amen! Sometimes I host a gun polishing get together at my luxurious estate every Thursday night. A bunch of brothers sit around polishing their barrels and grips. Sometimes we trade off and polish each other's weapon. That can be fun.

Another man's gun has a different feel to it.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
Nobar King's Avatar
Nobar King Nobar King is offline
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
Christ's Guardian
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '07 Christian Love Tin Tither Real American™ Cleanest Kitchen Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Hotrodder Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian True Christian Nerd TC Bravery Ex-liberal Ex-Christ-Killer Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 5 Years Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life 20,000 posts Eats the Most Pork True Republican Divorcee Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Grammar Nazi Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Cup of Jesus Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 04:34 AM

Gun cleaning is best learned young. Like motorcycle riding. As soon as they're old enough to hold the gun, they're old enough to clean it.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
Billybob Sunday's Avatar
Billybob Sunday Billybob Sunday is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Friend of Jesus

 
Posts: 261
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: The Godly Baptist State of Texas
Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.Billybob Sunday has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 04:50 AM

I agree with everyone else - this looks like a good Christian man. It was his lawnmower and it was in his yard. He had a perfect right to shoot the lawnmower. It probably was possessed.

I pity this poor fellow for living in the yankee state of Wisconsin. Here in Texas, no one would have blinked an eye.

Consider good old boy Joe Horn - he killed two spooks who were fiddling around in his neighbors' yard. He shot them in the back. The grand jury wouldn't even charge him with a crime. That's what we call TEXAS JUSTICE! Come to Texas, Mr. Walendowski, you'll fit right in! (disclaimer - your poelock name suggests you might be a cathylick - in that case, stay right where you are)

Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
eliot mayfield's Avatar
eliot mayfield eliot mayfield is offline
God Squad
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Long service medal, 3rd class Tin Tither Ribfest '06 Public Awareness Medal Saved 5 Years Long service medal, 2nd class Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Public Awareness Medal Christian Love Friend of Jesus Tell her once Flat Earth Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award

 
Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!eliot mayfield will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 07:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Avatar View Post
I polish mine. Repeatedly, one might say obsessively.

Sometimes I let my wife polish it, but she doesn't do it quite right. I usually have to redo it shortly after she's done.

I once had to have the inside of the barrel cleaned. Can't say I enjoyed that much.
What are you? Some kind of lazy city slicker? You better clean the gun out every time you shoot it!
Be sure to start with the wire brush attachment and some solvent, and really scrub that thing! Then get gentle and use the cloth and oil.



Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


http://www.shangrala.org/Pictures/Christ%20Michael.jpg
Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
Talitha's Avatar
Talitha Talitha is offline
Deaconess
Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Long service medal, 3rd class Real American™ Gunfest '08 Cleanest Kitchen Platinum Tither True Christian Lady True Christian Provider™ award Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life TC Bravery Ex-Brit True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Long service medal, 2nd class Early riser Touched by Jesus Donald Trump 2016! Pastor Ezekiel Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Talitha will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 08:00 AM

Don't forget to unload it before cleaning.
Wouldn't want to make a mess now would we? Some that I know of go off at the slightest touch.



Sister Talitha

Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



Reply With Quote
(#15)
Old
WilliamJenningsBryan's Avatar
WilliamJenningsBryan WilliamJenningsBryan is offline
True Christian™
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Gold Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS TC Bravery Christian Love Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Nerd True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Home Schooled Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life True Republican Eats the Most Pork Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Early riser Touched by Jesus Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Righteousness Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire

 
Posts: 9,361
Join Date: Jan 2007
WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WilliamJenningsBryan will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 09:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tidal wave of warm spit View Post
He wasn't charged because he shot his lawnmower per se, but because sawed-off shotguns are illegal and he was disturbing the peace. The charges would have been the same if he had shot his weed-whacker or his leaf-blower.
If every human was endowed by their Creator with the God given right to shoot their own lawn mower, that implies the right to own a firearm to accomplish the task.

I'm surprised you have not received an infraction for that incomprehensible syllogism, tidal wave or warm spit.

Have you learned how to boil water yet?


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
Reply With Quote
(#16)
Old
Bro Izzy's Avatar
Bro Izzy Bro Izzy is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™
 
Posts: 161
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Fighting sinners in NW Englandistan
Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.Bro Izzy has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: I will shoot my lawnmower if I want to - 07-27-2008, 09:52 AM

Unfortunately in Englandstan we are allowed guns,too many Muslims minimum 5 years in jail for being caught in possession of a gun. We are allowed shot guns and air rifles/pistols, but nothing that you could call a proper gun. Luckily I have had my fair share of guns in the army, machine guns GPMG (Gimpy) SA80, SLR, SMG, 84mm Karl Gustav 66mm, Browning pistol. How I long to feel that steel in my hands again, ahhhh memories.


Leviticus 18:22 Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
guns+ammo=free speech, wisconsin

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved