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Default Latest Video From LBC Young Men's Prayer Circle - 08-09-2014, 11:26 PM

Praise Jesus, the nubile young men and boys that I spend so much time Prayering with have made a very successful music video (composed by yours truly) with an excellent message for all the Christian girls out there. Number one with a bullet!



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Latest Video From LBC Young Men's Prayer Circle - 08-09-2014, 11:59 PM

Such a wonderful message!

Remember, friends, for a very reasonable fee, I make beautiful "modesty dresses" (the suitably modified blue one, below) for that special VIRTUOUS girl in your life or family!

(The Magdalene Red one can be used for Hussy Shaming)

These literally FLY off the rack when I run up a few, so get your orders in TODAY!



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Default Re: Latest Video From LBC Young Men's Prayer Circle - 08-10-2014, 12:37 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Praise Jesus, the nubile young men and boys that I spend so much time Prayering with have made a very successful music video (composed by yours truly) with an excellent message for all the Christian girls out there. Number one with a bullet!

Truly inspiring, Pastor, your personal commitment to young men and boys is showing even more than ever, Good work. Now, about the colored fellow who you put in the front of the video, whose got the piston-thrusting hip moves, you've introduced him before as Dominique. Is Dominique free to join Landover's missionary contingent to the First Fruits tour of Israel this fall sponsored by our friends at the Promise Keepers? Lord knows those Promise Keepers are a spirited bunch who'd MELT to Dominique's moves on the Temple Mount.


Newt

I loved Newt before Newt was invincible
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Default Re: Latest Video From LBC Young Men's Prayer Circle - 08-10-2014, 05:28 AM

What a beautiful message! And seeing an ex-Negro in there was a wonderful touch that shows the world that True Christianity™ is progressive and tolerant.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Default Re: Latest Video From LBC Young Men's Prayer Circle - 08-10-2014, 12:03 PM

Pastor Zeke,
I have to say you did an outstanding job turning the high school Varsity football team into shakers and movers, a fine job. I know it has been many years since I fought the crowds over that pig skin but I can't remember the team so limber and flexible.Is this some modern training technique or diet you've instituted? I just hope that the boys touring schedule doesn't interfere with our fightin' Spirits season. I can't wait to hear the crowds sing out ''You don't stand a ghost of a chance, WE ARE THE FIGHTING SPIRITS! You little wimps won't ever be winners we all know what God thinks of sinners''....(do pop songs still have a B side on the 45 discs, the team song a light hearted ditty that is sure to please).

That song brings back memories unfortunately I can only remember the 1st 12 verses. My favorite verse is that one that talks about the other team are the children of Ham and their parents, sodimites! That fight song really got folks ready for some football!


1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

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