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Reload this Page ITT: We pretend to be atheists!
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Janine Walker Janine Walker is offline
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Default ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-06-2011, 11:20 PM
I'll start!

Hey guys, I'm new here and I'd like to discuss with you why the Bible is wrong. The Bible is bull because this guy on television told me so! here

I'm a scientist and a mathematician that currently goes to the University of Ginger in Ontario, Canada! Haha, Christians are so blind and stupid. I've never read the Bible but I know enough to debate it!


May Obama be with you, Janine Walker
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-06-2011, 11:25 PM
I'm going to rape everything I can find!

Yours in Secular Humanism,
Temperance

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-06-2011, 11:48 PM
We totally came from monkeys even though monkeys still exist. Darwin is so cool.
Jesus is so stupid and is just copped from other religions. Haven't you seen Zeitgeist? It explains it all there. Hurrr Durrr.

Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-06-2011, 11:49 PM
Roast baby? Well, since I absolutely despise God, and since God is the only source of objective morality in the world, don't mind if I do!

Praise Darwin,

Lycia

"Whether of them twain did the will of his father? They say unto him, The first. Jesus saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That the publicans and the harlots go into the kingdom of God before you. For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not: but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him." Matthew 21:31-32

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-06-2011, 11:57 PM
Go Amalek, Go!

Rah, rah, Amalek!

Yea, Amalek!

Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-07-2011, 12:16 AM
Can I play, too?

Why do hate Jesus? Is it because of all the marijuana you've been injecting in your butt?

I like how Pastor "re-contextualizes" a lot of uncomfortable passages in the Bible so they make sense to me and seem not so contradictory, because he is NOT interpreting, just reading them the RIGHT way.

Tomorrow, when a talking donkey tells me about God's Divine Plan, I'll know it's because I'm blessed, and not at all insane.

Now I have to go to my prayer closet to ask God to keep his Intelligent Falling active, because I really don't want to fly off the Earth and hit the firmament and I'd drown in the sky.

God Bless!

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Janine Walker Janine Walker is offline
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-07-2011, 12:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
Can I play, too?

Why do hate Jesus? Is it because of all the marijuana you've been injecting in your butt?

I like how Pastor "re-contextualizes" a lot of uncomfortable passages in the Bible so they make sense to me and seem not so contradictory, because he is NOT interpreting, just reading them the RIGHT way.

Tomorrow, when a talking donkey tells me about God's Divine Plan, I'll know it's because I'm blessed, and not at all insane.

Now I have to go to my prayer closet to ask God to keep his Intelligent Falling active, because I really don't want to fly off the Earth and hit the firmament and I'd drown in the sky.

God Bless!
I hate Jesus because my parents didn't get me a nice car for my birthday! I mean HE DOESN'T EXIST DUH! Haha, you said ASS hahahahah!!

That's called physics not Intelligent Falling, see at this fakelinkthatleadsto nowhere. The Earth is round, take that one, Baby Jesus(actual link proving it!)

In Al Gore, Janine Walker
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-07-2011, 12:37 AM
Loves me some anal sex. Loves to bother me some barnyard animals. Don't care what the Bible says about it, nosiree. Think I'll go get an abortion and rape the dead fetus. No human soul there, nope. Guess I'll masturbate just to piss off God, since He didn't give me what I wanted, and He didn't manifest Himself on command. Time to go get a tatoo and smoke some marijuana. But I have to prostitute myself first to get the cash. The universe has no meaning, so I'll just force my beliefs on everybody and spread the AIDS to everyone in my circle of friends. And rape a few children while I'm at it. I'll wear some black robes and burn down a church. Yay!

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 01-07-2011, 12:56 AM
I'm going to go down to the library and read some books. By EUROPEANS!

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 04-29-2011, 11:57 PM
Boy, it sure was great masturbating to gay porn! Now I have nothing else to do for the day, might as well smoke some pot!

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 04-30-2011, 12:47 AM
Bestiality is okay by me cause we're ALL animals in the eyes of Darwin.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 04-30-2011, 03:32 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Saint Elmo View Post
Bestiality is okay by me cause we're ALL animals in the eyes of Darwin.
I know how an oven works therefore, no conscious entity is necessary to explain its existence.

I don't believe in rain, therefore rain does not exist and I'll leave my windows down.

It's only faith when stupid religious folks believe in something without personal experience. I believe in the books of Darwin and I'm not a scientist and have no way of verifying anything in his books, but I believe them all anyway and pray to Darwin every night.

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 04-30-2011, 03:39 AM
I just love to get off inside of another man. There is nothing like the feel of a greasy wop's pimply backside against my pelvis while I pretend to pile drive baby Jesus in the face!

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 04-30-2011, 05:28 AM
I have an original thought to myself. I do not need your search function. I am going to rant until you answer me you hypocrites. I don't care if it has been asked and answered, my mommy told me I mean something, so I deserve to know how it applies to me even though I won't believe you when I have heard it from you!

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Proverbs 5:19 A husband's commandment! And wives must comply.
19Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 05-11-2011, 03:11 AM
Christians believe in a Zombie Jesus. That's Voodoo, baby!

Rev 19:11 And I saw heaven opened, and behold a white horse; and he that sat upon him was called Faithful and True, and in righteousness he doth judge and make war.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 05-11-2011, 05:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Righteous Rider View Post
Christians believe in a Zombie Jesus. That's Voodoo, baby!
In what scripture did Jesus eat brains or walk around like a leprous spasticated retard? Oh yea, He didn't!

The best way to turn a dishwasher into a snowblower. . . . .
Give her a shovel.
Proverbs 5:19 A husband's commandment! And wives must comply.
19Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 05-11-2011, 12:59 PM
The behavior of Catholic priests completely invalidates the Baptist faith. I'm sure that the Catholic and Baptist faiths are identical, and I'm too lazy to check whether that's true.

This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 12-06-2019, 12:35 PM
What an idyllic evening; the sky! An insipid conglomerate of air molecules, light refraction and precipitation willed by the grace of evolution, nothing to do with a Creator at all.

No spoose should be more attractive than the other - that way, no one is satisfied, and the marriage can be happy.
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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 12-06-2019, 08:29 PM
I am confused. Please explain what "ITT" stands for. (For realz)

His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

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Default Re: ITT: We pretend to be atheists! - 12-07-2019, 12:45 AM
It a phonetic French colloquial term for clown "ITT" sounds like "eet-tee" like 'pitre', which is a clown, which also spells as It, the evil clown, which suggests athiests are really evil clowns.


No spoose should be more attractive than the other - that way, no one is satisfied, and the marriage can be happy.
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