[Pastor Ezekiel]

It is my Birthday. No-one has sent his substantial Birthday tithe to me. I see no private airbus jet on the Flint Mansion airstrip. I saw earlier a person wearing a face mask. Who was this traitor? Of course, the Donald sent me a nice refill for my edible gold pantry.

But where are your gifts? And the jet, all I asked was a tiny jumbo.

There will be consequences.

[MitzaLizalor]

Apologies for this delay – I've been tied up with funerals recently (not that I'd attend a ceremony where falsehoods are promoted, you'll understand, after all someone who may be questioning looking around and seeing me there could think "Well everyone else seems to agree.." well I don't and they'll never see me there which could be an opportunity, perhaps years later, to tell them about The Truth we know in Christ: actual Christ not the marzipan version, the version shoved down unwitting throats at fraudulent gatherings @ $so-much-per-word everything I do for Him I do for free) but anyway, where was I? Oh yes, so I've received a collection of international recipes assembled over nearly a century and here's one I've set aside for you. The formatting seems to come out OK and you could substitute some of the ingredients as suggested, according to availability.

All the best,

In Him,

Mitza.

INGREDIENTS

1½lb mixed game meat such as emu, wallaby
a young emu is best, bone out a thigh
prepare wallaby same as kangaroo
hare (boned) may be substituted
8oz venison steak cut into 1” cubes (or buffalo/wild boar)
¼lb lard (or grapeseed/olive oil)
2 red onions
¼lb smoked streaky bacon (remove rind)
1 bay leaf
1 orange, zest and juice
1 tbsp redcurrant jelly
1 bottle red wine
¾lb puff pastry
allow flour/water mix to firm up in a cool spot for an hour or so
knead a bit and roll out very thin
spread with lard
fold over like a sandwich & roll out thin again [double layer]
chill
spread more lard, fold & roll out thin again [4 layers]
chill
repeat [8 layers] and so on
chill when finished [the more layers the better]
Salt and pepper
beaten egg, for glazing

METHOD

Marinate the emu for 2 days (in wine)

in the frying pan
Heat a tablespoon of lard & brown the other game in small batches
put browned game to one side
Heat some more lard & cook onions for 5 minutes
Add the browned game & cook for another 2-3 minutes
Stir in the flour and cook for 2 minutes
Season well and stir in the bay leaf
add orange zest & juice
add redcurrant jelly
add some wine from the marinade

in the stewpot
Heat remaining lard and cook the bacon
Add the diced venison to the sizzling bacon
sizzle strongly for 5 or 10 minutes
Tip contents of frying pan into stewpot
Add remaining wine with emu
Cook until the meat is tender
Cool overnight

at the cooling stage
Compress the filling as shown:

pastry
Heat the oven to 400˚F
Roll out the pastry to size
Transfer pastry to stewpot
decorate with the pastry trimmings
cut a steam hole in the centre
Glaze with beaten egg

in the oven
Bake for 20 minutes
Reduce the heat to 350˚F
bake for 30 minutes until the filling is piping hot
pastry golden & risen

handy hint
A round breadboard sized to fit the stewpot makes an ideal lid.

[Esther B.]

Happy birthday, Pastor Ezekiel! Since my family can't tithe to Landover, we'll make a generous donation to your airplane fund.

[Brother Gonzalez]

Pastor, I tried to send you a new batch of nicaraguan houseboys, but it is very difficult to cross the border now. You know, because Donald made the mexicans close the border.

Happy Birthday anyway.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Slightly belated greetings, at least on the forums, Pastor. My husband says if you check the account in the country where they yodel, you should find that he didn't forget you. I hope the Balvenie arrived in good shape although, frankly, we all pray that little Hannah's knitted gift got lost in the mail.