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Reload this Page Obi-Wank Kenobi - Just Another Disney Series Mocking God or a Slight Improvement?
Satan's Entertainment Discussion for Movies/TV/Music/Video Games/Pop Culture. How HELLY-wood is destroying our society and parents can learn to protect their children from sinful influences like Disney, Pacman, and Tic-Tac-Toe.

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Default Re: Obi-Wank Kenobi - Just Another Disney Series Mocking God or a Slight Improvement? - 11-23-2023, 01:10 AM

I finally broke down and went to the banned film depository at the Greg Locke School of Free Speech at the Landover Baptist University and saw all of the Star Wars movies (under pastoral supervision, of course).

These are bad, bad movies and truly the work of the Devil. Three of them had exactly the same plot. The one constant in all of them is that the "Jedi knights" (who should have been called the Judas knights) go around piercing each other with light sabers. Light sabers are a kind of plasma or laser sword that starts small but gets bigger right before the combat starts, and have rainbow colors. You can't get more explicit with sodomite references than that!

I don't even know how to describe the plot of the final movie. A witch, a negro, a gay guy, and a furry go looking for some silly object that points them to the next silly object that points them to the final silly object, by which point nobody in the movie has any clue why they are doing anything and nobody in the audience cares. Then at the end, for a final touch of anti-Biblical messaging, the witch blatantly disrespects her grandfather, who was trying to set her up for a cushy career in the family business. Really--that is the actual plot! I've seen Marvel films with more intelligent stories! (Well, I didn't see the movies, but I've seen the trailers and Wikidpedia'd the plots.)

The only scene I enjoyed at all was the one where princess Lay Ya, played by the Jewess Carrie Fisher, is collared by the slave master Jappy the Pizza Hut. Here we see a man (well, a giant slug, but a male giant slug), exerting his proper Biblical authority over a woman. But even this is marred when Fisher starts fighting while wearing a bikini that reveals all of the charms that she used in her real life to tempt Christian men into sin, breaking free of her (Lay Ya's, not Fisher's) bondage.

In one movie, the only thing that happens is a bunch of furries, idol-worshipping Communists one and all, fight the rightful Imperial government!

Only a few characters in these films, Emporer Paypalpatine and Darth Vader, provide positive Biblical role models. The Emperor is a very Trump-like figure. He's elected to the position of Emperor, but then the liberal Jedi hegemony steal the next election from him and keep trying to foil his plans to return to his rightful throne. There are also echoes of Jesus, as the Emperor returns from the dead to save the galaxy. And the good guys are portrayed as the villians!

My grades for the films:

Plot: F-
Characterization: F-
Pacing: C
Special Effects: B not bad, but a little dated for the early films and way over the top in the later entries in the series
Consistency with Biblical principles: is there a grade lower than F-?
Overall: F

These films solidly deserve their inclusion in the Landover Baptist church list of banned media. No child should ever see these films. No adult should ever see these films. Household pets and farm animals shouldn't see them. If you run across a copy of any of them I urge you to burn it the same way you would burn a Wiccan.


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