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Default A question for the Scotch - 05-06-2021, 04:34 PM

Today I read in the news that Scots-land is holding elections. That's nice to see improvement. They say the election is a de facto referendum on independence after an historical 300 year union with England and some small islands. So given that, I have a question for the Scotch people: does anyone actually like it there? Every time I see a picture I see concrete, rain and evidence of substance abuse. Is that what you like?


Ephesians 5:18 And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit
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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-06-2021, 08:09 PM

Those heathens don't really care about independence, or community, or responsibility or even common sense. They care only about an excuse to leave work early and spend the rest of the day at the pub getting drunk. They need the kind of wake up call the Holy Spirit gave Saul/Paul - a Spiritual 2x4 upside the back of the head so they wake up three days later with a different name and personality. Preferably one that isn't afraid to work. Personally I don't know why the Holy Ghost doesn't do that more. It was remarkably effective, but I'm not one to tell someone else how to do their job so I'll just keep my mouth shut and wait in faith for His Superior Plan to come to fruition.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-06-2021, 08:26 PM

Brother Dr. Toole, Sir, there is really little point in asking questions of the Scotch. They are either too stupid to understand the question, or too drunk to answer.
I don't think they can intentionally have said anything about a de facto referendum, three words which they are unable to pronounce. Perhaps you misheard? It would be uncharitable (and unladylike) for me to suggest what they might have said.


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-06-2021, 11:11 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
They care only about an excuse to leave work early and spend the rest of the day at the pub getting drunk.
Unlike the English, of course, who merely enjoy an occasional beverage.

Quote:
They need the kind of wake up call the Holy Spirit gave Saul/Paul - a Spiritual 2x4 upside the back of the head so they wake up three days later with a different name and personality. Preferably one that isn't afraid to work.
Oh yes a little IQ adjustment often works wonders for non-believers in the power of the IQ adjustment procedure.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
three words which they are unable to pronounce
Well it wouldn't be the first -or last- 3 word phrase the Scottish have struggled to put together after a "quiet night" at home with the kids.


Ephesians 5:18 And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit
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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-07-2021, 12:30 AM

One wonders if the Scots will even remember when voting day comes around. Considering the state of their people (photo attached), it's unlikely that they could pry themselves away from their "refreshments" long enough to vote.

I once had a Scottish neighbour: Mrs. Dalrymple. I never did know her first name, as she insisted that she be called Mrs. Dalrymple. I invited her over to tea and Bible study, hoping she would see the truth about her Cathyolick "church", but it didn't work out so well. She was impossible to understand, and what little I did make out was all about "English crimes".

And, now that I think of it, isn't it Scotland that has a female Prime Minister? I seem to recall something in the ramblings that we've had on from another confused woman, that Miss Shah person. It's no wonder their nation is in such a mess! Well, election or no election, it's doubtful that things will change for the better when this is the situation at hand:




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Cross Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-07-2021, 12:41 AM

It is God's will that Scotland remain a part of the United Kingdom. Jesus Christ arranged it so that James VI, King of Scots, would inherit the English crown and then commission the KJV 1611 Bible in English. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-07-2021, 01:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
Brother Dr. Toole, Sir, there is really little point in asking questions of the Scotch. They are either too stupid to understand the question, or too drunk to answer.
Goodness, yes, dear Sister Joanna. I once saw part of a "sporting" event on the television, from Scotland. Those men were having a terrible time, due to their heavy drinking and being in a "falling down drunk" state. And, what kind of "sport" do they call this in the attached photo? It's highly doubtful that any of those Scots could be a team member on our NFL -- when they can't even stand up straight for a few seconds!



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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-07-2021, 02:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isabella White View Post
And, what kind of "sport" do they call this in the attached photo?
I believe that is called "swinging the lead", Sister. It has long been the Scotch national sport.


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-08-2021, 07:34 AM

The only thing the Scotch's think they're going to gain by independence is the North Sea oil - they need it to prop up their socialist economy (imagine that, socialists that don't want to share their wealth with anyone else). As such, they should be forced to remain part of the United Kingdom (it was the UK that built those oil rigs).

The only other thing the Scotch's were known for was inventing an early crude wireless telegraph that consisted of setting fire to crosses on high hills.

Other than that, there is nothing to recommend Scotchland, and you don't see lines of legal or illegal immigrants trying to get in. The reason is bagpipes - no one but the Scotches can stand that music and culture.

Back in Roman times there was a wall (Hadrian's Wall) to keep these barbarians out.


Memo: I'm wondering if playing bagpipe music at our Mexican border wall would keep them out.


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-08-2021, 01:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WilliamJenningsBryan View Post
The reason is bagpipes - no one but the Scotches can stand that music and culture.
So right, accidentally starting the microwave oven while your cat is inside and the sound of bagpipes is nearly identical. Unfortunately the sound of bagpipes persists somewhat longer.


For those of us who need to be reminded about how bad massed bagpipes sound, I give you this




Nasty sound. Please petition to remove all bagpipe music from YouTube


Phil "banjo" Ander


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-08-2021, 01:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil Ander View Post
So right, accidentally starting the microwave oven while your cat is inside and the sound of bagpipes is nearly identical. Unfortunately the sound of bagpipes persists somewhat longer.

For those of us who need to be reminded about how bad massed bagpipes sound, I give you this



Nasty sound. Please petition to remove all bagpipe music from YouTube

Phil "banjo" Ander
Oh, absolutely so, dear Brother Ander! I had to mute the sound on my IBM 386 computer, as Miss FiFi was trying to enjoy her kitty kibble! I shall start a petition -- immediately -- to have all beastly bagpipe videos removed from video sites, starting with this one:



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Angry Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 02:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phil Ander View Post
Please petition to remove all bagpipe music from YouTube
Amen! Those PC babies at JewTube deplatformed all my favorite Johnny Rebel songs and James Manning and Fred Phelps sermons, but they leave up God-hating filthy trash like THIS?




Devil music!


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
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Smile Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 02:58 AM

Yes, it is I, Harsha Shah here, and I am answering your questions. I have not been sleeping, yes, for many days now as I have been watching the election results slowly unravelling. Yes, it is now a big victory for our party, that is the SNP, that is the Scottish national party, and, yes, they are writing in the Scotsman, that is, one of our newspaper how the pro-independence parties now have 56% of all seats. Yes. I am hoping that this is not offending you, but we proud and independent Scotswomen are now planning to have a second referendum that will about our independence from the English. Yes, I am hoping that I am not offending you.

Yes, many of my friends who are Christians were praying that your Jesus would be giving us the victory and he was listening and granting the wish. Now the Mr. Johnson of England is suddenly also willing to negotiate with our Mrs. Sturgeon, the first minister. Yes. I am thinking now that all gods more or less imaginary have answered the prayers of us Scots and will be guiding us to freedom. Yes. I am hoping that I am not offending you but if I am offending you it is Jesus who was giving us this victory and you should be taking these issues up with him, aren't you thinking"! Yes. I asm sorry if I am offending you but I have been tasking a few drops of Highland Park single malt (it is very good and peaty as us Scotswomen) and I am feeling a bit tipsy, yes.


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 03:07 AM

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Originally Posted by Harsha Shah View Post
Yes, it is I, Harsha Shah here, and
Well, speak of the devil. Say, why are you pretending to be Scottish when you're very clearly a Punjabi Hindoo (Jeremiah 13:23)? If you actually want to fool people, try wearing plaid and eating haggis. Might as well actually do it right if you're going to be damned for bearing false witness anyway Proverbs 19:5).


"No room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7)?
Not if they'd come to the Blood of Christ Motel!
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Smile Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 03:17 AM

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Originally Posted by Dennis Lukes View Post
Well, speak of the devil. Say, why are you pretending to be Scottish when you're very clearly a Punjabi Hindoo (Jeremiah 13:23)? If you actually want to fool people, try wearing plaid and eating haggis. Might as well actually do it right if you're going to be damned for bearing false witness anyway Proverbs 19:5).
I am very sorry, Mr, Lukes, that I was offending you, yes, and I am sorry if I will be offending you again, yes, but my ancestors were originating from Gujarati, that is a part of India that is different from Punjab, yes it is. Gujarati is the state, from where also Gandhi-ji was coming from, yes. Gujarati is the biggest state or country in the world that is almost totally vegetarian, yes. It has been a blessing for my ancestors. I am inquiring where your ancestors were coming from, Mr. Lukes, and if you are still representing the country of their origin or the United States, yes? I am sorry if I am offending you but I am now seeing that all gods including your jesus were supporting us in this election and that is making us strong and independent, yes. I am asking you, Mr. Lukes to try praying for our election to be overturned and then we could be seeing in an empirical manner, who Jesus is listening to, yes?

I am thinking that your Jesus is like the story of the blind men and the elephant, yes? Are you being familiar with it, Mr. Lukes? You are hearing the trumpeting sounds from an elephant's trunk as the answers to your prayers and my christian friends are taking the answers they get from the heart murmurs as the only ones and the russians are thinking that it is only the noise of the rumbling intestine that is their answer. But there is also the infrasound and the sound of the elephant's feet when it is stamping the ground, yes! I am sure that this is a metaphor that can not be offending you, yes?


"Ecclesiastes 3:7
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!
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Bible Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 07:10 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Harsha Shah View Post
Yes, it is I, Harsha Shah here, and I am answering your questions. I have not been sleeping, yes, for many days now as I have been watching the election results slowly unravelling. Yes, it is now a big victory for our party, that is the SNP, that is the Scottish national party, and, yes, they are writing in the Scotsman, that is, one of our newspaper how the pro-independence parties now have 56% of all seats. Yes. I am hoping that this is not offending you, but we proud and independent Scotswomen are now planning to have a second referendum that will about our independence from the English. Yes, I am hoping that I am not offending you.

Yes, many of my friends who are Christians were praying that your Jesus would be giving us the victory and he was listening and granting the wish. Now the Mr. Johnson of England is suddenly also willing to negotiate with our Mrs. Sturgeon, the first minister. Yes. I am thinking now that all gods more or less imaginary have answered the prayers of us Scots and will be guiding us to freedom. Yes. I am hoping that I am not offending you but if I am offending you it is Jesus who was giving us this victory and you should be taking these issues up with him, aren't you thinking"! Yes. I asm sorry if I am offending you but I have been tasking a few drops of Highland Park single malt (it is very good and peaty as us Scotswomen) and I am feeling a bit tipsy, yes.
Oh, Miss Shah! There you are. Just the other day, I was thinking that it's been a while since you've decided to reach out to for advice and guidance. You know, Dear, we do remember you, each and every week, at our Wednesday Afternoon McGill Street Ladies' Bible Study, Prayer Meeting and Tea & Social. Why, Sisters Clarissa and Victoria have so graciously offered to hold a prayer vigil for your lost, doomed soul, in the hopes that you will see the error of your ways, and that you will abandon your wicked waywardness, and to seek the and , , in the fullness of

Now, then, Dear, I so hope that you will not mind my mentioning, but don't you think it is high time that you consider forsaking this silliness about Scottish independence? I mean, surely you must realize that this is a most unsuitable time for contemplating such things, seeing as how the United Kingdom has just come through a state of mourning over the loss of His Royal Highness, the Duke of Edinburgh.

And, as for you admitting that you've been indulging in tipsy tippling, well, must I remind you of this?

Proverbs 20:1 "Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise."

Isaiah 5:11 "Woe unto them that rise up early in the morning, that they may follow strong drink; that continue until night, till wine inflame them!"

Galatians 5:21 "Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of ."

May the bless you, dear Miss Shah, as you seek , here -- at .


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 07:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isabella White View Post

And, as for you admitting that you've been indulging in tipsy tippling, well, must I remind you of this?

May the bless you, dear Miss Shah, as you seek , here -- at .
That is kind of you, Sister Isabella, to help this Shaw lady with her problems. There is both the problem of strong drink and of not accepting Jesus.

If we knew which kind of alcohol she is abusing we might be in a better position to help her. Different parts of the world have different vices and her choice is still a mystery. For the life of me I can't remember where she is from. Is it Mexico? Or maybe Japan?


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 11:06 PM

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Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold View Post
That is kind of you, Sister Isabella, to help this Shaw lady with her problems. There is both the problem of strong drink and of not accepting Jesus.

If we knew which kind of alcohol she is abusing we might be in a better position to help her. Different parts of the world have different vices and her choice is still a mystery. For the life of me I can't remember where she is from. Is it Mexico? Or maybe Japan?
Why, I do thank you, ever-so-kindly, dear Brother Mayor Hold, for those lovely words. It is my pleasure to reach out to Miss Shah, in any way that I can, to assist her, and to show her where her footing is not secure. As a matter of fact, it is my duty, as shown to us in the blessed :

Titus 2:3-5:
3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

As for the type of alcohol that Miss Shah may be drinking, well, I don't know that we shall ever know the truth there. One hopes that she will soon learn the enjoyment of loving cream soda, instead. Now, then, as to where she is from, I think her profile says something about one of those places that cook those horrid curry concoctions. Harlem? Brooklyn?

Speaking of which, there is a restaurant about three blocks from me, called Vindaloo by Vishnu, or something like that, and I must say, when the wind is blowing this way, the putrid aroma is enough to deflower my prize-winning nasturtiums! One can only see, very readily, that this highly-spiced food has much to do with Miss Shah's rebellious nature!


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Default Re: A question for the Scotch - 05-09-2021, 11:35 PM

I asked my husband about the Scotch, and he said the only Scotch he cares about is Johnnie Walker. I have no idea who Mr. Walker is, but he must be a fine, upstanding Christian man for my husband to love him like that!


Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
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