Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Landover Today! > The Freehold Truth and Light Baptist newspaper
Reload this Page A Bird Feeder is Socialism
The Freehold Truth and Light Baptist newspaper Featured editorials, letters to the GODLY Pastors of Landover, local news, advise columns.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Johny Joe Hold's Avatar
Johny Joe Hold Johny Joe Hold is offline
Mayor of Freehold
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Mayor True Republican Teabag Patriot Ex-liberal Saved 1 Year Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Eats the Most Pork Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Mission to Korea Stamp of Approval Guns ablazin' Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel BFF of Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Sons of Liberty Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 12,122
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-13-2019, 05:12 PM

Every Spring it is my unpleasant duty to ask the good citizens of Freehold to take down their beloved bird feeders. I know you enjoy seeing the birds fly around these devices eating the seeds you have put there for them. But, please think of the message you are sending.

We at Landover Baptist join Jesus in opposition to welfare. When children see you giving birds something for nothing, they get the idea someone else is supposed to feed them the rest of their lives. This is how socialism establishes a political foothold in countries.

On top of that, I receive complaints from our pastors about the noise birds make. When our pastors are on their decks preparing sermons or writing their best selling books, they do not like to be bothered by the constant chatter of these nuisance animals.

Please cooperate with this city-wide effort to eliminate these freeloading pests.


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Joanna Lytton-Vasey's Avatar
Joanna Lytton-Vasey Joanna Lytton-Vasey is offline
True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
 

Christian Love Heaven Bound Most Obedient True Christian Lady True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Kirk Cameron Fan Club Touched by Jesus Quiverful Cleanest Kitchen Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls One Year/1000 posts The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Grammar Nazi Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Mission to Messico Hands Off Saved 1 Year 2015 Witch Hunt Award In Love With Zeke Pro-Life Ex-eurotrash Persecuted Stamp of Approval Mower Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Crown of Incorruptibility God's chosen ones Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 8,762
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-13-2019, 09:08 PM

Brother Mr Mayor, Sir, obviously bird-feeders are just dumb. But could the general bird problem be solved by a more relaxed attitude to cats? We all know that cats are the Devil's spawn and that women who harbor cats should be shunned. But they (the cats, not the women) are reliable destroyers of birds, so long as you don't make the mistake of feeding them (again, I mean the cats).

We have a medium-sized colony of feral cats on our property, principally for rodent control in the barns, and I have to say that I haven't seen a live bird anywhere near the garden for years. Even the Great Black-Backed Gull (Larus marinus) is no match for a team of hungry cats. The children agree that picking up the feathers and carcasses is a very small price to pay for being allowed to sleep until after dawn.

Obviously, these bewhiskered brutes are not allowed within 50 yards of the house. The combination of a powerful sprinkler system and boys armed with pellet guns sees to that.


Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-14-2019, 10:05 PM

Sister Joanna,


How much longer will your husband make you suffer the perils of Great Britain? Is it possible he can finish his work there by hiring someone to cook and clean for him, allowing you to return to your estate in Freehold? Keeping two residences free of birds has to be tough, especially from afar - although I know you have help tending your modest 31 room home in Iowa.


I would love to be closer to little Hannah and of course the boys. Won't you discuss it with him and see if he has objections to my sending you airfare? It would be for God's glory.


In the meantime, I love your idea of the feral cats being allowed but we would have to pray God's blessings on them so demonic spirits do not infest them and lead souls to satan. It's so easy to fall victim to the wiles of the devil, even pure, humble, blood washed saints like you.


Your friend forever,
BrotherLarry


(Unca BrotherLarry to Hannah)


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
James Hutchins's Avatar
James Hutchins James Hutchins is offline
True Christian™
Just a Regular Nice Guy
 

True Christian™ Silver Tither Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Provider™ award Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator TC Bravery Gunfest '09 Ready for the Rapture Punched the most queers Jailed for JESUS True Christian Caucasian The Lord’s Witness Wound Teabag Patriot Mission to Australia One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life ex-sheep-shagger Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Hotrodder Saved 1 Year Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award 20,000 posts Long service medal, 3rd class Home Schooled Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Early riser Kirk Cameron Fan Club Trump of GOD Mission to Korea Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Incorruptibility Alternative Facts Mower Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Crown of Righteousness Crown of Life Crown of Rejoicing BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus In Love With Zeke True Christian™ Cowboy GLORY Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!James Hutchins will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Smile Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-15-2019, 02:01 PM

We have bird feeders a the Hutchins Farm, LLC. We use it to attrack all sorts of brightly colored birds. Cardinals, Blue Jays, Northern Red Bishops, Prothonotary warblers and Gouldian finches.

This way they are congregated in a area where stray bullets will not hit the house or barn. We hang them from the rafters of the bunk house where the field nigras hole up. This permits the little Hutchins tykes to learn about firearms.
Isaiah 40:31
31 But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

It warms my heart to see the childrens eyes light up in wonder as the gunshot from 10 feet away drops the lifeless body of a brightly colored song bird.
Isaiah 58:14
14 Then shalt thou delight thyself in the Lord; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

For the rest of the day, the child drags their prize about the yard, occasionally swinging it around and around above their head making believe they are providing the gift of Intelligent Pulling ™ (just as God does).
Psalm 104:3-4
3 Who layeth the beams of his chambers in the waters: who maketh the clouds his chariot: who walketh upon the wings of the wind:
4 Who maketh his angels spirits; his ministers a flaming fire:


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Red Army's Avatar
Red Army Red Army is offline
True Communist™ - will suffer for an eternity in Hell
Unsaved Trash
 

Commmmmunnissss Marxist

 
Posts: 98
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Weimar 1920
Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Red Army is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-15-2019, 03:20 PM

Yes, they are.

When I was young, we have planned the invasion of America. While a direct invasion was out of the table, because of the treason by Gorbachov and the vietnamese being such pussies that they did not want to fight outside their country, a more planned invasion was developed.


It started with bird feeders. We knew at some point it would create, not communist, but at least democrats. People would think "what if..." and then, soup kitchens, food stamps, and Obamacare.


So we introduced the first communist bird feeders in the early 50's.


That was the first part, the second was invading Hollywood. And then you had movies like "Footloose" ridiculing a Baptist preacher, and a Baptist town. And "The Karate Kid" with japs beaten up strong, masculine WASP's. I remember those two, it could have been more.


The third communist wave is going on right now. I cannot tell the plans yet. You can figure it out. Hint: Beto O'Rourke is involved.


Acts 2:44-45
44 And all that believed were together, and had all things common;
45 And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
BrotherLarry's Avatar
BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™

Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian™ Ready for the Rapture Porn Resistant Persecuted One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Gnathologist Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Stamp of Approval Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork TC Bravery True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Touched by Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Ex-Mary Worshipper Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Trump of GOD Asked questions later Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud Team Fortress Denier

 
Posts: 2,395
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Prodigal Son of Godless NYC.
BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!BrotherLarry will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
flag Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-15-2019, 03:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Red Army View Post

When I was young, we have planned the invasion of America.

Hint: Beto O'Rourke is involved.

Mr. Army:


You commie pigs are all the same. Have you not figured out by now that America is God's favorite country? The reason you have not taken over is because of the constant vigilance of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He vigilizes over us day and night, walking in the light and the darkness, thwarting any commie attempts to introduce communitism in the land of capitalist abundance.


It's time for you to admit that you're jealous of the American lifestyle - full of joy, opportunity, religious freedom, and, yes - Donald Trump - the same Donald Trump who did NOT collide with you or any other Rushin before he was legitimately elected in 2016.


He will triumph again in 2020. Begone with you, foul commie devil. Jesus will NOT let you win.


BrotherLarry


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Jeb Stuart Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
 

Public Awareness Medal One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Saved 5 Years Gold Tither Heaven Bound TC Bravery TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tagging for Jesus Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Alternative Facts Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: A Bird Feeder is Socialism - 04-22-2019, 02:40 PM

I think we could use bird feeders as a teaching tool. A parable.

The attempt to feed birds is like the welfare state. There's a lot of work by people who don't know what they're doing. The assembly instructions get lost. Hammers hit fingers.

Then you get the feeder set up, and the birds are too stupid to notice it. They fly right on by. Why are we trying to help creatures that can't even help themselves?

Then the squirrels and the fat, fat raccoons are the only ones profiting.

When the dumb birds finally figure it out, they mostly fight each other for no reason, scattering seeds on the ground, wasting it.

Then you realize that you could have gotten the same result by simply shooting the birds and using their corpses to feed the raccoons directly. I think the metaphor has broken down at this point. I think.


Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!

Last edited by Jeb Stuart Thurmond; 04-23-2019 at 11:47 AM.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
birds, cornfed

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved