Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Landover Today! > Pastor Zeke's News Wire
Reload this Page Breaking: wind. (Tornadoes). Yang Gang trashes hotel. Chokahantas.
Pastor Zeke's News Wire Keep up to date with an ever-changing world from an even more Godlier perspective than FOX News.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Jeb Stuart Thurmond's Avatar
Jeb Stuart Thurmond Jeb Stuart Thurmond is offline
Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
 

Public Awareness Medal One Year/1000 posts Long service medal, 2nd class Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Saved 5 Years Gold Tither Heaven Bound TC Bravery TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tagging for Jesus Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Alternative Facts Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jeb Stuart Thurmond will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Exclamation Breaking: wind. (Tornadoes). Yang Gang trashes hotel. Chokahantas. - 03-08-2020, 02:47 PM

BREAKING:
The Committee on the Rights of the Child of the United Nations condemns the government of the Cook Islands for criminalizing homosexual sex.
Wait what?

Say again?
The Committee on the Rights of the Child of the United Nations condemns the government of the Cook Islands for criminalizing homosexual sex.
Why does a child-rights committee care about buttsex? Is this a case of bureaucratic mission-creep, or just plain creep-creep?

Meanwhile proof that God does not answer the prayers of false-Christians:
2020 coronavirus outbreak in Vatican City

A Vatican source said the patient had participated in an international conference hosted by the Pontifical Academy of Life last week in a packed theatre several blocks from the Vatican.

Participants at the three-day conference on Artificial Intelligence included top executives of U.S. tech giants Microsoft and IBM.

Should have upgraded your virus protection, techbros.
A court in Russian-controlled Crimea sentences a Jehovah's Witness to six-years imprisonment for activities of a banned extremist organization...
What makes them extreme, do they sip their vodka instead of chugging it?
Xinjia Express Hotel, a hotel being used for COVID-19 quarantine in Licheng District, Quanzhou City, Fujian Province, China, collapsed...

The police started an investigation concerning Mr Yang, the proprietor of the hotel.
Turns out "Yang gang" is not just an expression....
The Republican-controlled Arizona House of Representatives passes a bill banning transgender females from women's sports.
Look, I'm no tran-fan myself, but what does this have to do with small and unobtrusive government? Why should government care? So they can oogle the athletes without accidentally mind-licking dude-booty?

Tranny cheerleaders on the other hand, now that would be worthy of a act of government.
After failing to win any states on Super Tuesday, Massachusetts U.S. Senator Elizabeth Warren suspends her presidential campaign, leaving Hawaii U.S. Representative Tulsi Gabbard as the only woman left in the race.
So if you're so sexist you can't vote for a man, you'll have to trade Pocahantas for Chokahantas:


Offended by the artistic representation of a brown person? Why, is she the prophet Mohammed?
The National Weather Service reports 11 tornadoes touched down resulting in 25 confirmed deaths. Eighteen people remain unaccounted for.
Oz is real. Liberal-bias geography is Fake News. SHARKNADOS TO COME!
MSNBC political anchor Chris Matthews resigns over criticism of making sexist comments and comparing Bernie Sanders' campaign to the Nazi invasion of France.
...Because both are ancient history?


Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
Got Questions? See Frequently Asked Questions, or use Forum Search, tag system, or our guides on Geography, History, Science, Comparative Religion, Civics, and Current Events.
Did I use a new word you've never heard? Definitions here. | Vote! Everything you need to vote here!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
aids 2: gayer and blacker, choking hazard, chris matthews, coronavirus, jehovah's witlesses, toilet paper, tornadoes, vatican, world war c

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved