[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin

THERE IS NO RAPTURE! When Jesus comes again, "He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and His Kingdom will have no end."

That's the only time He's coming back. And time will end, and eternity will begin.

your insistant blabbering of no end makes me feel like I'm in Hell.

For GOD'S Sake Brother Pervie, what can we do to make you a Tc? Your heart is in the right place, but your mind is too stupid to get it.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by Offcr. Albert Martin

THERE IS NO RAPTURE! When Jesus comes again, "He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and His Kingdom will have no end."

That's the only time He's coming back. And time will end, and eternity will begin.

Maybe your Romanist coloring-book Bible left out the Rapture, but I assure you that the Rapture is real.

Matt. 24:40-41: Then shall two be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left. Two [women shall be] grinding at the mill; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

Luke 17:34-36: I tell you, in that night there shall be two [men] in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left. Two [women] shall be grinding together; the one shall be taken, and the other left. Two [men] shall be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

I Thess. 4:16-17: For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive [and] remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.

[Seeker]

Sean Hannity for being a mouthy Lying Catholic and I don't think I even need to explain Alan Colmes.

[Peter McKain]

Originally Posted by Pastor Isaac Peters

Luke 17:34-36: I tell you, in that night there shall be two [men] in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left. Two [women] shall be grinding together; the one shall be taken, and the other left. Two [men] shall be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.

Two men in the same bed? Sounds like neither should have been taken to me.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by Peter McKain

Two men in the same bed? Sounds like neither should have been taken to me.

Are you questioning Christ?

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Whooooooooooo whoooooo! Chugga chugga!

Now boarding...

These two monkey worshipping homers (the lies they spread are SHOCKING! (and I'm sure the one to your right is what the homer "community" calls a "bear" (thanks to my ex-sodomite husband, Mr. Whitford, for explaining that to me)))


A car full of sodomites driving themselves right to Hell!


ET phone home... to Hell! Demons are NOT cute and fun for children, Jooven Jooeyberg.

[LyingDingDong]

Hey! Don't forget to pick me up!

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Originally Posted by LingBlingDingDong

Hey! Don't forget to pick me up!

I don't think there's any chance you won't have a seat.

[Dr. Santiago Solo]

Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde

Brother, you are part of LBC's family. Of course you are special and of course there is always room for you to sit beside ME or Zeke.

~~~~ pats chair~~~~ Come, sit down. Let me help you take a load off.

Ohhh, yeah. Sister, that feels so good... I feel so relieved now, mmm... this is blissful, really

[JennyD]

Originally Posted by LingBlingDingDong

Hey! Don't forget to pick me up!

Just lay across the tracks, dear, and let the cow-catcher do its job.

[Deaner]

DING! DING! DING! DING!

Hey, do we have any fat people yet? Will she fit on the train? Maybe we could just get a crane and float her in the air like a Macy's elephant.




All Aboard!!!

chug.......chug.......chug.......chug.....chug.... .chug...chug...chug...chug..
chug..chug..chuggachuggachuggachugaa...toot toot!!

[Justina Thyme]

This poor wide load woman could surely benefit from this advice:

Lard is fat from hog carcasses. Lard is a commonly chosen ingredient in general purposes commercial shortening, bread and pastry, pie crusts, crackers, cookies, cookie fillers, icing shortening, household shortening, margarine. Anything listing "shortening" is suspect, including baked goods, breads, cake mixes, cakes, canned beans, crackers, packaged mixes of all kinds, pie crusts, pies, snack foods, tortillas. Consumers need to be aware that the ingredients declared on food labels as "mono- and diglycerides" or "emulsifiers" may be derived from lard and thus ultimately from hog carcasses. These compounds are so widely used that we cannot give you a list of foods commonly containing them, but they may be found in beverages, lard, ice cream, iced milk, baked products other than bread and rolls, shortening, confections, chewing gum base component, sweet chocolate, milk chocolate, etc., oleomargarine rendered animal fat or a combination of such fat and vegetable fat, whipped toppings, prepared baking mixes, peanut butter. This information came from the "JOURNAL OF HEALTH & HEALING", VOL. 12 No. 1.
The first step in getting your body healed is to pray for Healing or a Miracle. If you don't get that Miracle right away, the next step is to CAST THE DEMONS OUT. Once you have done these two steps, you MUST change your eating habits, exercise, and take some form of vitamin and mineral supplements. Any brand at all are better than none at all.

You can't cast a demon OUT if your problem is you are eating the wrong food. If you get a lot of tooth cavities, it could be a demon causing it, BUT, it is probably because YOU are not taking care of your teeth. Understand what I am saying? Be careful not to miss the demon, but also use some common sense.

Although I must say that she does cut quite the comedic figure, struggling to get those absurd jeans fastened up like that. She's obviously a glutton, which in and of itself is a demonic force.

[Old Iron Crotch]

Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria

I don't think there's any chance you won't have a seat.

I thought you had been kidnapped.

[Remy Lebeau]

Originally Posted by Dances without Joy

Any images you have of me are strictly in your imagination.

I'm not really into pale freckle faced redheads rolling around in the mud with leaves and twigs in their hair, so I don't choose to imagine those photos you sent.

Oh, so now you want to deny your depravity? It is at least reassuring to know that you have some sense of shame. The fact that you care about what we True Christians think about you demonstrates that deep down inside you can carry about the everlasting damnation that awaits you.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Let us not forget: every foul sodomite pervert sicko that ever lived will be cast down into the deepest pits of hellfire, where they will be tortured endlessly in unspeakable ways. Praise Jesus!

[Remy Lebeau]

Originally Posted by SanzSolo

You certainly enjoy stealing other people's threads, huh? Tell, me, o wise one, why do you think I'm going to Hell?

I think that catlick has finally lost his god damned(literally) mind. Here we see the true face of catholicism: Unbridled Hatred for Jesus and His Elite.

He must have finally realized the error of his ways and his limited intellect in incapable of coping. Walmart agent Martin, how does it feel to know that your priest lied to you when he said that Salavation could be administered as an anema when you were a young altar boy? You can still be Saved, boy. It's not too late.

[Justina Thyme]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Let us not forget: every foul sodomite pervert sicko that ever lived will be cast down into the deepest pits of hellfire, where they will be tortured endlessly in unspeakable ways. Praise Jesus!

This is most distressing! Couldn't someone rescue that poor, forlorn little creature from the insanity of that overloaded, tacky-looking shopping cart? And what is that thing standing next to him? We need either a demonologist or, at the very least, a cryptozoologist on this Godly forum!

[Remy Lebeau]

Originally Posted by Dances without Joy

You got that right - he gets his own car!

Oh, so you believe in Hell when it suits your personal likes and dislikes. Danceless, so you're a salad bar christian after all.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Elvis Impersonators and Midgets are DOOMED to HELL.

TOOT TOOT!

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Originally Posted by Dances without Joy

I thought you had been kidnapped.

That just goes to show that you'll believe whatever ridiculous nonsense you read. Sister Jenny's unfortunate hallucinations have been explained and the perpetrator was shot last night trying to escape police custody.