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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
01-06-2019, 02:23 PM
I think we should move this to the entertainment forum.
Oh, okay, George H. W. Bush. He must be lonely. Everyday it must be:
"Oh hey, Dubya! Never thought I see you so soon! So what did you in: another pretzel, or did someone throw a shoe too hard -"
"No, I'm his father. He's still alive, for some reason."
"Oh. Um....Okay....Uh....Nice weather we're having?"
"IT"S ALWAYS NICE YOU SHALLOW **%#$@"
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
09-06-2019, 10:07 AM
A good friend of mine, Mr. Robert Mugabe, the former Godly President of a shithole country Zimbsomething is now with Jesus!
Glory.
An ex-Hamite, a keen opponent of sodomy, and a most charitable host will be sorely missed for a while but soon I'll rejoin him in Heaven. His place by Jesus will be almost but not as prestigious as mine. He often entertained me and my selection of traveling houseboys in his nice mansion where we could occupy 2-3 of his 8 bedrooms. He always enjoyed edible gold as much as I. He always said that only God could remove him and now they're together for eternity. Tithe more and strive and one day you, my people, might be as Godly as he was. My mansion needs some upgrading, and that's something that could lead you closer to Jesus.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
09-06-2019, 11:37 AM
A man sadly used by an acquisitive harpy.
Proverbs 5
3-6 The lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: but her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a twoedged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell. Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.
8-11 Remove thy way far from her, and come not nigh the door of her house: lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel: lest strangers be filled with thy wealth; and thy labours be in the house of a stranger; and thou mourn at the last, when thy flesh and thy body are consumed.
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Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Not hacked by Mossad
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
09-06-2019, 09:26 PM
Praying for dear President Mugabe. I didn't approve of his policy of unleashing hordes of jungle monkeys to beat white farmers and take their land, but they probably had it coming, as any white taking up permanent residence (excluding those in a missionary position) in the heart of darkieness is probably an abominable sinner. The late Mr. Mugabe knew well that God commands segregation (Deuteronomy 7:3, 2 Corinthians 6:14) and that no white person can be an African. I wholeheartedly agree with this statement and its implied inverse; no black person can be an American.
Just a shame that the media and world leaders won't mark his ascension to the colored section of Heaven the way they mourned Nelson Mandingo's fall into Hell. In honor of Robert "Black Hitler" Mugabe and his achievements, all whites should leave Africa and all blacks should leave America. Oh Jesus let them switch places! Please Lord please!
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Distinguished Professor of Prayer Healing and Creation Zoology (Baraminology) Victim of atheist scientific persecution
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Posts: 10,337
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: On a mission in Godless Europistan
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-02-2020, 04:33 AM
ELVIS IS DEAD! At 85, the reclusive King of Rocking Rolls succumbed to the coronavirus Covid-19. And before his death, he repented. He became a Trump supporter and wielded one of the mightiest weapons available (apart from nukes and the Bible), the MAGA hat! Glory!
He did unspeakable things during his youthful days, as follows: - He simulated self-abuse on stage and turned countless young boys into sodomistic pleasures.
- By simulating self-abuse on stage he paved the way to Madonna the Principal-Enemy-Of-Jesus, the Papist turned Joo.
- With his staged death he invented Fake News and caused our beloved leader President Trump much future frustration.
He also did some laudable things: - He courted in the Biblical manner his wife Priscilla when she was at the tender age of fourteen, not too unlike Isaac and Rebecca (who was admittedly only three when they married).
- He served in the Godly US army in postwar Nazi Germany.
But, as told in the news article above, he repented. He became a Trump supporter. He had a MAGA hat. What would Jesus think of that?
2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
Jesus approves! Elvis is now a New Creature in Heaven. His sins were washed away by the Blood Magic of Christ! He is undoubtedly among those purest of the pure who sing hymns in His Glory 24/4. Glory.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer
2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.
PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
Check out our Research in Creation Science:
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Possibly retarded pothead
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Posts: 1,003
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Here in Babylon
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-03-2020, 04:00 AM
Greetings!
One day I will be transported to Holy Mount Zion but only after I die which will be a long time from now I hope. I fear it is already too late for I to be everliving because of all the fornication. On the slopes of Mount Zion I will meet Bob Marley who is my hero along with Marcus Garvey who I expect to meet as well. Both were hounded by the white man until they died. Bob Marley was assassinated by the CIA of Babylon with a secret drug that causes brain cancer because he was bringing the people together all over the world and even in Africa and the white men put Marcus Garvey in jail for being a successful Black man.
I am pretty sure that white people are not allowed in and if some are then I am sure that there would be a special place for them which is out of sight and would not cause offense.
Jah Guide!
Trevor
Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-03-2020, 08:33 AM
What, you're not expecting Jesus to be there?
Revelation 22:16 I Jesus have sent mine angel to testify unto you these things in the churches. I am the root and the offspring of David, and the bright and morning star.
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-03-2020, 09:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
What, you're not expecting Jesus to be there?
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Sister, I wouldn't expect to find Jesus in an Anglican/Lutheran cemetery in Jerusalem, would you? And it would be even more surprising if Bob Marley or Marcus Garvey turned up there. Garvey is buried with the catlicks in Kensal Green, North London and I have no idea what happened to Marley. They probably shoved him on a bonfire, stood around and inhaled.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-04-2020, 05:16 AM
At the time of our reunion with Jesus there will be no Mount Zion for anybody to meet anyone. It—along with Mount Everest, the Mariana Trench, Lake Baikal and the Transantarctic Mountains—will all have been incinerated. Context provided here:
II Peter 3:2-13 …be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour: knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts, and saying, Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation. For this they willingly are ignorant of, thatby the word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water: whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished:but the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men. But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the whichthe heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up. Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness, looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat? Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness.
God is not the sort of person to fry everything and then go home. Peter finishes his epistle by encouraging us to look for Phase II in God's plan for Salvation. After the perdition of ungodly men and universal incineration, God assures us that there will be something else and gives the strongest form of evidence to underline His assurance. Actual history! Future history observed by John and recorded so that we can know too.
Revelation 21:1-5 [John writes as follows] And I sawa new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth† were passed away; and there was no more sea. And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things‡ new. And he said unto me,Write: for these words are true and faithful.
It's a triple assurance. Assurance from Peter who prophesied the future incineration of everything and our hope for a new Creation. Assurance from John who witnessed future historical events. Assurance from God that what He showed John should be written down so that we would know. The topographical implications seem to have escaped Trevor Rastafari but of course he's free to look forward to being on Mount Zion when these events take place.
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† This necessarily includes Mount Zion.
‡ Mount Zion is a topographical feature within modern-day Jerusalem. Whether topography is reproduced in the new Jerusalem is a moot point, for example: topography when? This region is smitten with seismic activity on a regular basis Nahum 1:4-6. Nevertheless we will not be left hanging in a void and know, because it has been observed, that God is providing a new environment perfectly suited to our requirements.
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Possibly retarded pothead
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Posts: 1,003
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Here in Babylon
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-04-2020, 05:46 AM
Greetings!
I have often thought that it is possible that Mount Zion is not on this planet but on another one far away. If it was on Earth the white people would have already taken it and built time share condominiums.
I know that Holy Mount Zion is not the same as the white heaven but it is much better. On the slopes of Zion there is ganja enough for everyone and it is in amply supply always. Also Black people know how to have a good time. In the white heaven everyone floats around on clouds and spends all their time praying. I am very glad to be a Black man destined for Mount Zion and not a white man going to heaven.
Jah Guide!
Trevor
Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
07-04-2020, 06:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by I Man Rastafari
Greetings!
I have often thought that it is possible that Mount Zion is not on this planet but on another one far away. If it was on Earth the white people would have already taken it and built time share condominiums.
I know that Holy Mount Zion is not the same as the white heaven but it is much better. On the slopes of Zion there is ganja enough for everyone and it is in amply supply always. Also Black people know how to have a good time. In the white heaven everyone floats around on clouds and spends all their time praying. I am very glad to be a Black man destined for Mount Zion and not a white man going to heaven.
Jah Guide!
Trevor
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How does that "ganja" grow?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 1
Join Date: Jul 2020
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XYZ -
07-21-2020, 12:39 PM
I can't think of anything to say.
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Curry slurping demon
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Posts: 323
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Godless Scotland
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
10-31-2020, 01:52 PM
Yes, it is Harsha Shah here and I am bringing you some sad news and I am hoping that you are not offended by them, yes. I am telling that a countryman is now dead, that is Mr. Sean Connery, who was playing the famous James Bond in many movies and the Highlander in some great movies about an Independent Scotland, yes. Here is a link to a local newspaper that was reporting this, yes.
https://www.heraldscotland.com/news/...-dies-aged-90/
Yes, I am a young and independent woman and Mr. Connery was 90 years old when he was dying but I am finding him quite attractive, yes. I am attaching here a photo of him
Yes, he was quite conservative in many aspects, which I am hoping is not offending you, but also a great actor and he was always supporting Scottish independence, yes. I am thinking that he was gathering some good karma and if was not ready to be ascending into nirvana to be losing himself in the vastness of the Universe, he will surely soon be reincarnating in a good family, yes. I am sad that he is gone and I am happy that he was living a productive life, yes.
"Ecclesiastes 3:7
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."Yes. Women are saving lives. It is time we are speaking! Yes!
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
10-31-2020, 02:02 PM
Dear Moderators, I think Mizz Shah has mistakenly posted this to the wrong thread. She probably intended to put it here, where it belongs.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Not hacked by Mossad
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
10-31-2020, 02:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
Dear Moderators, I think Mizz Shah has mistakenly posted this to the wrong thread. She probably intended to put it here, where it belongs.
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Connery wasn't afraid to slap a hysterical woman and send her back to the kitchen. Judging by his views on women, he may yet have been a Christian we'll meet in Heaven.
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
02-17-2021, 06:36 PM
Rush Limbaugh, called to the bosom of Jesus after 70 years of service on earth.
Rush Limbaugh death: Conservative radio host dies aged 70
Right-wing star credited with helping shape modern Republican party
Mr. Limbaugh showed us what it means to put faith before fact, faith before respect, faith before common sense. If Jesus Christ had valued any of these things He would have put them in His autobiography, the Holy Bible, King James Version.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Posts: 13,158
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Godly Midwest
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
02-17-2021, 08:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Rush Limbaugh, called to the bosom of Jesus after 70 years of service on earth.
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My neighbor used to run the motor of his car in the backyard every week from spring to fall, just so that all of the neighbors could hear Rush on his car radio. I'll miss that. I wonder whom will he have us all listen to come spring?
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True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
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Posts: 8,776
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
02-17-2021, 08:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Rush Limbaugh, called to the bosom of Jesus after 70 years of service on earth.
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Oh my goodness, I have only just seen this news - simultaneously both sad (for those of us who remain behind) and JOYOUS! (for Mr Limbaugh).
I take this optimistically, as A Sign that Mr Limbaugh's work here was done and that the Rapture cannot be far away. Our temporary loss is Radio Heaven's gain, and his presence on the celestial airwaves is one more thing to look forward to.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Mayor of Freehold
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Posts: 12,176
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
02-17-2021, 09:59 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Rush Limbaugh, called to the bosom of Jesus after 70 years of service on earth.
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I know those uncaring liberals will say his lung cancer was caused by his habit of smoking cigars. But, I believe Trump's defeat caused him to die of a broken heart.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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Innkeeper for Christ
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,719
Join Date: Dec 2018
Location: Not hacked by Mossad
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Re: Stars we'll meet in Heaven -
02-17-2021, 11:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
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I don't know. I used to listen to his show all the time back in the '90s and he hardly ever backed up his assertions (which were usually correct, though he was a tad centrist for my taste) with Biblical citations. You can faithfully abide by all of God's hundreds of commandments, but if you don't accept Jesus as your personal savior who died for your sins, you're going to Hell (John 14:6).
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