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True Christian™ Televangelist Director of Fundraising and Tithing On the Look Out for Wife #6!
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Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 01:22 AM
Wait....what? Did the Good Reverend Himself actually speak such nonsense? Yes, I did, but it's not nonsense, please hear me out.
First of all, I totally agree with all the rational, sensible arguments on why homosexuals shouldn't be allowed in the military. Such as the uncomfortableness on the part of straight soldiers having to shower with homosexuals, and even possibly getting raped. Or that sissy queers aren't simply man enough to fight as bravely as a normal soldier would. Yet, have we entertained the possibility of segregated units? Traditionally, segregated units worked wonderfully in our military past. We segregated the negroes in our armed forces all the way up until Vietnam. And, is it any wonder that we won every single war up unto that point?
Segregated units of homosexuals could be used effectively by practical-minded generals. One role I could see homosexual soldiers specialize in is IED search and removal. Right now, we use expensive multi-million dollar robots for that role. And quite often, those robots blow up and thats millions of taxpayer's money down the drain! It would be fiscally prudent if we used $30,000 a year homosexual soldiers for that role instead. In this time of a debt ceiling crisis and struggling economy, how could we not do this?
A brilliant tactician could also find a use for a homosexual unit. Say the enemy is holed up in the mountains somewhere, waiting to ambush us. Send in a homo unit, lightly armed and highly visible to draw out the enemy and reveal their positions, allowing the straight soldiers a chance to snipe them off and shell them in safety. Sure, there will be some casualties, but we can afford a war of attrition. And it's not like it would be a big loss on our part. Couple dozen queers get mowed down by RPGs and machine gun fire? There's more where that came from.
I just think it's high time to start thinking outside of the box if we want to win this War on Terror®. More than likely we will be in the Middle East for the next 50-100 years (until the oil runs out), so we're going to have to stay ahead of Al-Qaeda by using every advantage we have.
Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 02:17 AM
I like your reasoning on this Rev. Jim, but what I worry about is if our queer soldiers linked up with their queer soldiers, all war may cease to exist!
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
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Posts: 23,743
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Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 02:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I like your reasoning on this Rev. Jim, but what I worry about is if our queer soldiers linked up with their queer soldiers, all war may cease to exist!
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Well, you can't let them go out to the local discos on their night off. That would ruin everything.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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With faith as immovable as the Earth
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Location: Body in England but HEART IN FREEHOLD!
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 03:08 AM
Wonderful idea Reverend. It's also very caring and compassionate. If you think about a regular straight soldier normally leaves behind a grieving widow and children. This would not be the case with a homo. Ok, so his parents may be sad but it's not as if they have lost a real son and they would finally have a reason to be proud.
Maybe you could let them pick their own uniform? A bunch of guys mincing across the battle field in shocking pinks, feathers and leather straps is bound to draw out the enemy fire and help exposure their position.
YiC
Jack
Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
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Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 03:18 AM
Also, it will be more fun to watch homers die on television than normal soldiers. Knowing that the homers will burn in Hell for all eternity just makes it that much more exciting.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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True Christian™ Televangelist Director of Fundraising and Tithing On the Look Out for Wife #6!
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 03:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I like your reasoning on this Rev. Jim, but what I worry about is if our queer soldiers linked up with their queer soldiers, all war may cease to exist!
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Hmm...that is a genuine concern, brother. I know I wouldn't want to live in a world without eternal wars. I couldn't imagine a more disgusting and horrible world to live in.
And a lot of homos do go for the "ethnic types". We wouldn't want any of our gay soldiers who are supposed to be out probing for IEDs instead probing teenage Arab boy soldiers.
Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 04:19 AM
I don't think they would do much good. I would think it would be best to let them get captured and when the Muslims rape them they will pass the AIDS on to them. Use them as biological warfare. If they don't have the AIDS to spread they have other diseases.
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With faith as immovable as the Earth
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,779
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Body in England but HEART IN FREEHOLD!
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 06:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I like your reasoning on this Rev. Jim, but what I worry about is if our queer soldiers linked up with their queer soldiers, all war may cease to exist!
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We wouldn't want it do anything that might delay the rapture.
Matthew 24:6 And ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass,
Please make it today Lord,
Jack
Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.
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Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade Jesus macht frei
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Re: Why Gays SHOULD be allowed into the military! -
08-02-2011, 10:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I like your reasoning on this Rev. Jim, but what I worry about is if our queer soldiers linked up with their queer soldiers, all war may cease to exist!
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And aids is spreading...
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