[Jacob the Angry Liar]

I find that arriving a few hours early for service eliminates this problem. Why, last week my van was the only vehicle in the parking lot when I arrived!

[James Hutchins]

That is right Jacob! Many savy Landoverians also arrive the night before in their Airstreams and set up in the RV section across the road. For a small fee, the Church jitney will bring them to and from services.
You might want to let Ofcr. Richards know that is you in the van and not some pot smoking fornicator. It would be wise to invite him in to search it.

[Jacob the Angry Liar]

Originally Posted by James Hutchins

That is right Jacob! Many savy Landoverians also arrive the night before in their Airstreams and set up in the RV section across the road. For a small fee, the Church jitney will bring them to and from services.
You might want to let Ofcr. Richards know that is you in the van and not some pot smoking fornicator. It would be wise to invite him in to search it.

Funny story about that, actually. A few weeks ago, he pulled me over on my way to Church. He thought I was a rapist because I was driving a van, so he wanted to make sure I was marrying the harlots who victimized me. Boy, was he in for a surprise when all he found in there was piles of Chick Tracts for handing out to the unsaved! Glory!

[Nobar King]

Please be cautious when parking on the north side of Elijah St. There is a sharp drop-off and no sidewalk. You should park with your wheels on the street, and remind your passengers to be careful when exiting the vehicle.

[Nobar King]

[Nobar King]

Please remember to tell your friends that parking at the Church parking lot is reserved for Church members only, and their guests, when visiting the Church, ONLY. Using the parking lot while you are shopping or dropping your kids off at school is not welcome.

[Nobar King]

Sometimes parking is the biggest problem of all:

[Nobar King]

I just noticed a new parking sign as I passed by Freehold drug and liquor. I didn't have time to stop to take a picture. It was a spot reserved for "families with children". What is up with that??? People are always complaining about the obesity epidemic, so shouldn't those families be required to park in the farthest spots? So that the kids can at least get a little bit of exercise? And what's the point of having a family parking spot in front of a liquor store?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

I just noticed a new parking sign as I passed by Freehold drug and liquor. I didn't have time to stop to take a picture. It was a spot reserved for "families with children". What is up with that??? People are always complaining about the obesity epidemic, so shouldn't those families be required to park in the farthest spots? So that the kids can at least get a little bit of exercise? And what's the point of having a family parking spot in front of a liquor store?

Maybe they need brandy because the baby is teething.

Oh, and something from the drugstore side to rub on the baby's gums.

Tell me, does the whole family have to be present? What if I have three children but they are at home?

[Nobar King]

If you are ever cursed to visit Australia, don't park your car next to a raging river.

Or, if you do, make sure your car is well insured!

[Nobar King]

I'm getting really tired of all of those blue wheelchair spaces that seem to be everywhere these days but no one seems to ever be parked in them. I'm an old man and I'd like to be able to park next to the store but I have to park a mile away like everyone else. I wish they would just get rid of them altogether. I don't need people hassling me when I want to just hop into the store for a minute for some Miller High Life. I'm just glad I'm not famous because I wouldn't need some nosy parking enforcement troll to broadcast any little parking infractions that I might make. Don't people have anything better to do?

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

And have you seen how many of these parking places there are!!! How many cripples do they expect to arrive at one time. From what I hear, they are all unemployed, so what are they doing with cars????

The other thing is these creatures expect to be treated equally. OK, let's have some equality! I grant them the freedom to walk just as far as I do. Most of them do it sitting on their ass, wheeling themselves along anyway, whilst we have no place to rest.

God crippled them for a reason, who are we to lessen His Justice?

[Jarpen]

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire

And have you seen how many of these parking places there are!!! How many cripples do they expect to arrive at one time. From what I hear, they are all unemployed, so what are they doing with cars????

The other thing is these creatures expect to be treated equally. OK, let's have some equality! I grant them the freedom to walk just as far as I do. Most of them do it sitting on their ass, wheeling themselves along anyway, whilst we have no place to rest.

God crippled them for a reason, who are we to lessen His Justice?

And you call yourself the Pastor for "diversity and tolerance"... You unrighteous bigot.

Scum like you make me sick.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Originally Posted by Jarpen

Proverbs 6:16-19: These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

A proud look: This means that you look at others arrogantly as if you are better than them. By that logic most everyone on this forum is hated by the Lord as you all think that you are better and more deserving of a heaven then others. You think of yourselves as better than hindus, muslims, negros, basically anyone different then you.

Originally Posted by Jarpen

And you call yourself the Pastor for "diversity and tolerance"... You unrighteous bigot.

Scum like you make me sick.

Which is it, sunshine?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Jarpen

And you call yourself the Pastor for "diversity and tolerance"... You unrighteous bigot.

Scum like you make me sick.

Seriously? You waltz in here uninvited and unwelcome, spewing your joo-garbage all over the forum, and now you want to pick fights in a thread on local parking issues?

Why don't you go bother the papists. I'm sure they'd love to argue with you.

[James Hutchins]

I thank the Lord we do not have these 'blue plate special spaces' in Landover.
Those lazy lardbutts wouold not be in the pickle they are in if they'd just get up and move.
At the Landover Crystal Cathedral, only Pastors, Reverends and Platinum Tithers have spaces near the Chuch. Across the street is the Gold, then down the block is the Silver. There is no lot for the Tin Tithers, just a pay per view Jumbotron as they are not allowed on Church grounds. The people with defects should stay home (outside of Landover), read thier Bibles and pray God does not strike them down that instant. I really have no use for them at all.

[Nobar King]

Parking is a problem in Pittsburgh with rogue valet parkers taking over city streets.

http://triblive.com/news/allegheny/3...#axzz2Oq2qSCrs

[Johny Joe Hold]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

Parking is a problem in Pittsburgh with rogue valet parkers taking over city streets.

Thank you for reminding me about all the problems associated with valet parking, Brother Nobar.

There is always a big crowd at Landover Baptist Church on Sunday. I get calls asking if the City government could provide valet parking at the church. Some senior citizens have trouble walking to the Church when they can't find a parking spot nearby.

I explain to them valet parking is not offered anywhere in Freehold. Our City actually does not welcome people who cannot walk in a normal healthy way.

[Nobar King]

More parking inconsistencies:

[Johny Joe Hold]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

More parking inconsistencies:

Brother Nobar--It has occurred to me we might need to consider a community meeting in Freehold to discuss the problem this video raises. That is, too many parking spaces are used up by people with small, puny cars.

The most convenient spaces need to be save for people driving the largest vehicles. People trying to save their pennies by driving those puny 1/2 cars need to understand they have to walk further. But, the word doesn't seem to get out about this.