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Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 12:08 AM
Brothers and Sisters of Landover-
I have come upon quite a conundrum in the providing of deserts for my family. They have become tired of my meticulously layered cakes and lattice-topped fruit pies and are craving something lighter for the summer months. I have considered using Jello brand Gelatin, but I have come across mixed information regarding the gelatinous substance. I have found both lovely American delicacies made from the boxed powder made of fruit flavor and cow bones-
But I've also seen some disturbingly suspicious forms of it:
Not to mention the way it jiggles like one of Satan's BET minions!
What is the best choice here, fellow Christians? Is Jello safe for my family, or a gateway to hellish perversion?
Yours in Christ,
Sister Bernadette
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True Christian™ Officer of THE Law
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 01:52 AM
Jello is a great dessert, and what could be better than eating a Jello shaped like America or the flag? Spread some coolwhip on it and you're talking grade-A dessert.
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True Christian™ Beauty Queen
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 02:21 AM
I agree with Mr. Richards, Jello is a wonderful American dessert. You can make it into any shape you like. And what's wrong with the way it jiggles? That just makes it more fun!
I wish I had some Jello earlier today when I was out enjoying the sunshine. Did anyone else notice how beautiful the weather was today? Just magnificent!
Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
in 2016
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 05:35 AM
From the pics I can see where you would have concerns. But it just looks like even Jello has been corrupted by the homers.
My only problem with the jello is the jiggling. Could cause some of the ladies to wonder what those breast implants really would feel like.
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 06:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lord warrior
My only problem with the jello is the jiggling. Could cause some of the ladies to wonder what those breast implants really would feel like.
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Worse, it could cause some of the men to think about it!
On the plus side, Muslims hate it.
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 05:40 PM
I think Jello is probably OK to eat. Especially the red, white and blue kinds. I'm sure even JESUS himself would enjoy that jiggly treat.
Now, chocolate pudding is another story. It's the color of negroes and looks just like negro skin, lumps and all. Bleeech.
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God Squad
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 06:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD
Worse, it could cause some of the men to think about it!
On the plus side, Muslims hate it.
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What will be next, Kool-aid? Christians love Kool-aid!
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-18-2009, 06:44 PM
That explains my confusion....we call it JELLY!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jelly
It's only really popular with kids at birthday parties to be honest and I can honestly say I have never seen it so colourful as in your pictures!
As it's around 44% pigs skin watch out for swine flu!
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-21-2009, 08:23 PM
Thank you for your kind help Brothers and Sisters! Based on your opinions I've come up with a wonderful solution (though if anyone finds one better, please let me know!): Red, white, and blue varieties only, and I think i'll serve it IN the molds of the American flag, the United States, etc, to reduce jiggling and make sure it is a True Christian shape. I'll just avoid the more radical strawberry (pink-the color of gay), grape (purple-for bisexuals), and lime (green-for those dirty hippy environmentalists) Jello flavors, and everything should work out fine. Again, thank you all so much for your input!
In Christ,
Sister Bernadette
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Doubting Thomas
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 03:30 AM
Green jello is also the favorite of Mormons, Cassidy.
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Lying fluffy-bunny false Christian, Unsaved trash
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 04:18 AM
I love jello! It's so delicious! Definitely a gift from the Lord! And maybe it is a gateway to gay, but who cares? God loves gays, despite Him saying they are abominable and unnatural in the Bible. I know the Bible is perfect, but I like to just read the nice parts, and obviously the bad parts don't count cause the good parts sort of cancel them out? JESUS IS LOVE!
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 04:33 AM
Hi, um, I find you very interesting. Do you have aim? This may be an infraction, but I don't know or see any way as to send personal messages. I'm WindOfThorns. I hope you find this before this is deleted.
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 04:36 AM
By the way, I don't really like Jell-O.
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Lying fluffy-bunny false Christian, Unsaved trash
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:00 AM
I don't have AIM. I have MSN tho.
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:04 AM
Drats...Is MSN yahoo? Idk, but there's always email. I'll give you my spam email, until I can send my "real" one without it being possibly pilfered.
[email link deleted]
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindsAglow
Hi, um, I find you very interesting. Do you have aim? This may be an infraction, but I don't know or see any way as to send personal messages. I'm WindOfThorns. I hope you find this before this is deleted.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Serenity-Millennium
I don't have AIM. I have MSN tho.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WindsAglow
Drats...Is MSN yahoo? Idk, but there's always email. I'll give you my spam email, until I can send my "real" one without it being possibly pilfered.
[email link deleted]
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This is not a lezbean pick-up joint! You two perverts take it elsewhere.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:21 AM
We are not Lesbians. I wanted to befriend a person [and her the same] and that makes she and I gay...? I wanted to converse with one person, instead of the masses and that makes me gay~will you explain this careless assumption at least?
This site does not allow one on one communication, except when you give me infractions and send me insults. This was a way to have a private conversation, not to become a same sex couple.
So if to befriend someone means: "I'm that stupid", than I suppose I must be the dumbest of them all.
But thank you, for showing me Modern-day bigotry.
Have a Nice Life.
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Lying fluffy-bunny false Christian, Unsaved trash
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:26 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WindsAglow
Drats...Is MSN yahoo? Idk, but there's always email. I'll give you my spam email, until I can send my "real" one without it being possibly pilfered.
[email link deleted]
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Oh well, I guess we do have to follow the Pastor's rules!
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:36 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serenity-Millennium
Oh well, I guess we do have to follow the Pastor's rules!
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I suppose so, but I think he may be already banning me. My posts are disappearing slowly.
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Lying fluffy-bunny false Christian, Unsaved trash
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Posts: 472
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Re: Jello-Great American Dessert or Gateway to Gay? -
06-28-2009, 05:40 AM
Well, as the Bible says, you must love and pray for Pastor Ezekiel!
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