[James Dewitt]

Brother Fred most Liberals, NO all liberals have no idea what it takes to be a CEO. The amount of time I spend on one of my private jets going from one factory to another is beyond their comprehension. Oh yea they all want to unionize us for better pay, health,eye and dental insurance, but they are not cutting the checks for payroll are they? Hey why don't they try on my shoes for a day. I just love it when the damn Liberals say Oh you make too much money as a CEO.Last year after paying taxes I almost cleared 125 Million, do they have any idea how much fuel costs for a private jet?

[RomanK]

tell me brother Fred, hows the arizona wine buisiness?

[Free Market Fred]

Originally Posted by James Dewitt

Brother Fred most Liberals, NO all liberals have no idea what it takes to be a CEO. The amount of time I spend on one of my private jets going from one factory to another is beyond their comprehension.

You are SO right, Brother James. While our factory workers only put in mere 18-hour days (with one Sunday off per month), as CEO I'm on call 24/7 with no holidays. Whenever there's a crisis that my subordinates can't handle (and that typically happens every couple of years), they'll call me up in the middle of the night.

The last time that happened was in 2008, and I can remember it clearly. It was late in the evening and I was witnessing with one of my young Cambodian Bible students when suddenly my cell phone rang. I had to get out of the hot tub and get dressed, and get onto Skype for a video conference call (you can't do those calls in your birthday suit, you know).


Witnessing is hard work

This was the infamous Chinese melamine milk scandal. My company was being accused of cutting milk powder with melamine in order to reduce costs while testing positive for high protein content. The US government banned the import of our milk products, and they were talking about criminal prosecutions.

That crisis wasted nearly three days of my precious time (and all for a lousy $900,000 per hour). I talked to some of our Chinese politicians and bribed them to grab a few street people, clean them up, promote them to top-level management at our Chinese milk powder factory, then publicly arrest and execute them. Ironically, the bleeding heart liberal anti-death penalty activists helped us out with all the publicity they gave this. We also had to change the brand name of our milk, because the American public stopped buying it. In order to keep the milk price down, we found other chemical substitutes for melamine, plus we added some steroids to hide the side-effects. That still left us with a lot of unsold milk powder, but fortunately we were able to unload it on the US military (for our soldiers in Iraq) - thanks to our no-bid contracts, we also do food service for the troops, and no one tests what we feed them.

The above crisis-management is just one example of how hard I work. I'm sure there are other examples, though right now none come to mind. I feel totally justified in saying that I deserve every penny I earn, and it's totally unreasonable to expect me to pay taxes. After all, if the government taxed me, I'd have no incentive to work - thus there would be fewer gold bars in my vault for future generations to steal after I've ascended into Heaven (though I plan to take all the gold I can carry). How much is the entry fee to Heaven, anyway? Any Cambodian Bible students up there, or do I need to supply my own?

Well, fortunately, I don't pay any taxes. Thanks to our shell companies overseas and a little accounting magic, my company always manages to report a loss to the IRS. I'm sure that this is what the great Ronald Reagan was referring to when he talked about the magic of the market place.


Trickle down - works like magic

[James Dewitt]

Brother Fred, I understand your pain.
A few years ago a toy company I own in China was in a bit of a jamb. It seems that you can not add lead to paint and us it on children's toys. How in the world was I supposed to know that kids suck and chew on them, it is not like I am their parents. Oh sure it added to my bottom line and increased profitability to 45%, but I did it more for the environment. All that lead trapped under ground has a potential to pollute ground water. It seems to me that we are better off mining it. At any rate after months of emails and possible law suits and countless bribes the problem went away. I do not use any lead in paint now, and my proffits have dropped to 41% on the toys. Just think what I could have done with that other 4%, how many jobs have been lost?

[Free Market Fred]

Originally Posted by James Dewitt

Brother Fred, I understand your pain.
A few years ago a toy company I own in China was in a bit of a jamb. It seems that you can not add lead to paint and us it on children's toys. How in the world was I supposed to know that kids suck and chew on them, it is not like I am their parents. Oh sure it added to my bottom line and increased profitability to 45%, but I did it more for the environment. All that lead trapped under ground has a potential to pollute ground water. It seems to me that we are better off mining it.

Brother James, I greatly sympathize. The liberal elitist EPA is always doing stuff like that. They made a big deal over the cheap Chinese drywall that we imported from 2001-2007, just because it emitted sulfur gases that a few hypochondriacs claimed made them feel ill (and rotted hypochondriac copper electrical wiring). Thank the Lord that we imported it under the label of one of our Nigerian shell companies, or we'd be facing billions in lawsuits.

Anyway, about the lead paint you put on kids' toys - my tech people came up with a solution a few years ago. We found that depleted uranium makes an excellent substitute for lead. In fact, it's even better than lead since it glows in the dark - the kids really love that! Plus, depleted uranium is cheap - ever since 2003 we've been giving it to the Iraqis for free!


Public-private partnership: Yet another win-win situation

My company has a large amount of this valuable substance that we'd be glad to send you, just for the cost of shipping. As an astute businessman, I'm sure that you'll take advantage of this fantastic offer. I'll send you the contact info for our lawyer in Nigeria who can help you set up a shell company lest the Marxist Obama EPA gives you any flack.