General Church Fellowship A place for True Christians to join in praise, faith and fellowship. |
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-07-2008, 07:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggoty Old Crone
Perhaps it's time to change your Depends.
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Why, how very Rude, Crude & Almost Lewd
WELCOME BACK, Pastor Ezekiel!!! As you will Surely remember, I have stood by you all along.
So now what's in it for ME?
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member
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Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-07-2008, 07:19 PM
Hurray! Pastor Ezekiel is back!
Does that mean I can have my building permits back now?
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-07-2008, 07:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggoty Old Crone
Perhaps it's time to change your Depends.
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It's definitely time to change your attitude, missy, unless of course you're looking forward to ...
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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LBU Professor and Biblical Wordsmith Extraordinaire President of the Ex-Negro Academy Alumni Association Freehold Best Tan Award winner, 10 yrs running
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,048
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Chateau Lebeau (Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-07-2008, 11:16 PM
Welcome back, Zeke
I wouldn't want any other man to lead this church and no finer man could there be for Sister Thumper. My faith in you was not just demonstrated in words, but also actions. I can't wait to see your first official church sermon this coming Sunday, now from the front row. It was also very nice of Pastor Billy-Reuben's family to move to our old seats in the second row. My wife is so excited.
And I deeply regret all those good people whose lives were lost recently. May Jesus admit them into His loving arms. Amen.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-07-2008, 11:26 PM
Well thank you all, but I'm really not sure what the fuss is all about. I was busy doing missionary work in the Des Moines jail for a few days, and then had to spend some time soaking in the mineral springs at Saratoga to get the stench off me (had to burn my clothes too), but I feel rejuvenated now.
I understand that there was some trouble here on God's favorite forum while I was away? Some hacked accounts or something? I'm sure Brother BJ and his boys in security will get to the bottom of it.
Whoever installed all the new security gizmos in my estate is to be commended. Praise Jesus.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Exposing DEMONS for Jesus
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,705
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: On a long, strange trip
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 12:08 AM
I, for one, am proud to have so fine a True Christian™ gentleman as a pastor and a friend. Welcome back, Sir! Will you and Sister Thumper be available one of these Sundays in the near future for dinner, as we had planned before all the--er--commotion broke loose? My houseboy Luis and my maid Conchita have both made special mention that they will make themselves available to serve us at that occasion.
Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.
1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .
A SPIRITUAL WARFARE PRAYER:
Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver. . .
LANDOVER BAPTIST DEMON HUNTING PERMIT #00666-27
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 16
Join Date: Feb 2008
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:01 AM
How very interesting that just a few days ago a lot of people who say they never doubted you had been doubting you a few days ago. Either they switched their allegiances or their accounts were hacked.
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member
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Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jesusrule
How very interesting that just a few days ago a lot of people who say they never doubted you had been doubting you a few days ago. Either they switched their allegiances or their accounts were hacked.
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We have reason to believe that one Judas going by the name of Dr. Otto Bond, Sr. actually DID hack into the accounts of several members.
We also have reason to believe that he is not who he claims. That's all I can say at the moment.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 16
Join Date: Feb 2008
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD
We have reason to believe that one Judas going by the name of Dr. Otto Bond, Sr. actually DID hack into the accounts of several members.
We also have reason to believe that he is not who he claims. That's all I can say at the moment.
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Ah so an attempted Hi-Jack. By the way good to see you got your TC rank back.
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Honorary True Christian™ Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member
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Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jesusrule
Ah so an attempted Hi-Jack. By the way good to see you got your TC rank back.
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Thank you!
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jesusrule
Ah so an attempted Hi-Jack. By the way good to see you got your TC rank back.
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With a little work, an open heart, and some on-your-knees work with Jesus, you too might become a True Christian someday.
Have you hit that Paypal button at the bottom of this page yet? Baby Jesus needs a new pair of shoes.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
Forum Member
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Posts: 3,054
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Right here, right now
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
With a little work, an open heart, and some on-your-knees work with Jesus, you too might become a True Christian™ someday.
Have you hit that Paypal button at the bottom of this page yet? Baby Jesus needs a new pair of shoes.
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And somebody has to pay for all that new bling you just laid on Thumpy.
Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,554
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 04:41 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jesusrule
Ah so an attempted Hi-Jack. By the way good to see you got your TC rank back.
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Got her account back? Sister Jenny has always been in good standing. You must be thinking of a minor car registration problem she had.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 06:27 PM
I always knew that a Man with such Ewe-fully pretty eyes must be as Pure as the Driven Snow
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 06:59 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggoty Old Crone
And somebody has to pay for all that new bling you just laid on Thumpy.
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You need to work on hiding your envy, my dear.
Anyway, Pastor Ezekiel, we'd love to have you over for dinner soon. My future son-in-law in particular is a big fan of yours.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
Forum Member
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Posts: 3,054
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Right here, right now
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 07:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Isaac Peters
You need to work on hiding your envy, my dear.
You've got it backwards, comme d'habitude.
I have the only bling I need - my wedding band. And a wedding band is one piece of bling that Zeke will never pony up.
Anyway, Pastor Ezekiel, we'd love to have you over for dinner soon. My future son-in-law in particular is a big fan of yours.
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No doubt he saw the pictures...
Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: At the Gift Exchange Counter
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 07:45 PM
I can't Believe she continues to post as frequently as ever under "Maggoty Old Crone"......
Sister, in a Christian "Humility" is indeed a Virtue, but.....? Jumpin' Jehosophat if you don't beat all
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SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
Forum Member
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Posts: 3,054
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Right here, right now
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 08:09 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUV
I can't Believe she continues to post as frequently as ever under "Maggoty Old Crone"......
Sister, in a Christian "Humility" is indeed a Virtue, but.....? Jumpin' Jehosophat if you don't beat all
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Did you really think that I'd go away just because you lot changed my name?
Besides, maggots are useful creatures - they help keep the world from being knee-deep in dead tissue.
And a crone is a woman who has reached menopause, which I am, so that's not the insult you intended it to be.
Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 08:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maggoty Old Crone
No doubt he saw the pictures...
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Of course I have a ring...duh...just not the band yet........... .
It'll happen someday. Just you see.
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SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
Forum Member
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Posts: 3,054
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Right here, right now
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Re: Welcome back, Pastor Ezekiel! -
05-08-2008, 08:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
Of course I have a ring...duh...just not the band yet........... .
It'll happen someday. Just you see.
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You keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.
Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!
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