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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 07:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
I still haven't heard from him or anything about his icehole.

I'm worried sick!
Sister, if you need a strong shoulder to cry on an comfort in your time of need, I am always available. You let me know and I'll be your pillar of strength. I am worried about Zeke too, but he can take care of himself and I am certain that he'll come out smelling like a rose whatever he is up to.

Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 08:25 PM
I don't know... in one of his last posts, didn't he mention something about "holes" and "wire brushes"?

Mark 16:17 And these attesting signs will accompany those who believe: in My Name they will drive out demons.

1 Kings 21:14 Then they sent to Jezebel, saying, Naboth is stoned . . .

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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 08:26 PM
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Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
He didn't mention anything about that to me or I'd have bought him a new kitten, being how much he enjoys my pussy, Penelope.

Wait a minute..... I thought I overheard him say something about a bunny ranch. Could that be it? I wondered to myself why he cared. It's not even close to Easter....?
Sister Thumper you have always allowed me to rest my head on your bosom in my time of need. I will provide whatever support you require in your time of worry now.



Leviticus 26:27-29

27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 08:29 PM
Don't worry about Zeke. God takes care of His own.

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Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 08:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
Don't worry about Zeke. God takes care of His own.
That's so true Pastor. And He hever gives us more than we can chew.

But still...

Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 08:57 PM
Thank you for all your offers of support dear Brothers that's so very sweet of you.

I just tried calling his cell phone and he's still not answering. I also noticed he left his iGod player at home too! He never leaves without it.



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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 09:10 PM
We should all take turns comforting Sister BTB. She should never be alone in her time of need!

Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 09:22 PM
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Originally Posted by Wide-Open View Post
Reverend! Now really! This is NOT the time to play hide & zeke. We are at a loss. We are moaning. <sp?>

Now speak out, or for ever hold your tongue. The DoF knows where Salem is, capice?
Brother, I wonder if the DOF could gain access to the private message that Rodimer is hiding from us?

That way, we'd not have the expense of sending agents to torture . . . er, help him recall the content.

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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 09:28 PM
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Originally Posted by JennyD View Post
Brother, I wonder if the DOF could gain access to the private message that Rodimer is hiding from us?

That way, we'd not have the expense of sending agents to torture . . . er, help him recall the content.
They have a portable waterboard baptismal pool, it is not a torture device. Plus they use enhanced interrogation techniques.



Leviticus 26:27-29

27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 10:04 PM
Surely, you'd not want a Man of God to break his word!

All I can say is that Pastor Ezekiel is on a mission of mercy to . . . wayward, um . . . persons in desperate need of a healthy dose of, er . . . the warm love of Jesus. And is definitely NOT in my basement.

He'll have to fill you in on the details upon his return.

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Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 10:09 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
Surely, you'd not want a Man of God to break his word!

All I can say is that Pastor Ezekiel is on a mission of mercy to . . . wayward, um . . . persons in desperate need of a healthy dose of, er . . . the warm love of Jesus. And is definitely NOT in my basement.

He'll have to fill you in on the details upon his return.
Well, I hope he returns with nothing missing! If he does, you will be responsible for replacing it!




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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 10:09 PM
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Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
He'll have to fill you in on the details upon his return.
Well, as long as everything's under control. I look forward to him filling us all in.

O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-12-2009, 10:13 PM
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Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
Well, I hope he returns with nothing missing! If he does, you will be responsible for replacing it!
I haven't removed a single one of his 2,000 parts! And I couldn't anyway, as he is NOT chained up in my basement!

Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 12:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
Surely, you'd not want a Man of God to break his word!

All I can say is that Pastor Ezekiel is on a mission of mercy to . . . wayward, um . . . persons in desperate need of a healthy dose of, er . . . the warm love of Jesus. And is definitely NOT in my basement.

He'll have to fill you in on the details upon his return.
Thank the Lord, Brother Rodimer! For a moment there I had thought Zeke might have been kidnapped! We are at Code Red! Landover may be under attack from Queer Terrorists as we speak!

Everyone be on guard. They have already attacked my home, Lord knows who's next.

I will pray for you all.

This is Brother P signing out. I will contact you all when I reach the safe location. Please do not try to contact me. They could be monitoring this as we speak.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 12:31 AM
I asked my husband, Elmer, what's going on with Pastor Zeke and he told me to GO SEW! My female intuition tells me that the menfolk know something & they're not telling us!
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 02:09 AM
I don't see any ice in that photo!!!!

May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 03:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
I asked my husband, Elmer, what's going on with Pastor Zeke and he told me to GO SEW!
A Blessing that Brother Elmer wasn't too annoyed, by the sounds of things, Mother Glynndie, or he'd have told you what Pastor tells me: "So Sew Your Underwear"
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 03:56 PM
Well Friends, another day went by, and still: no news.

Nothing.

The DoF has dropped almost everything (apart from a few investigations into a certain unnamed "family" ) and STILL has no new intelligence.

I called him, mailed him, skyped him, poked him (!), but... nothing.

I hope you'll all join me in prayer.

"Dear Baby Jesus,
I know it would be quite awesome
to see Pastor Ezekiel sitting
at Your Right Hand
even before the Glory comes.

Sipping a cold one. (or two)
The cold one might even be Belgian.
Who knows?
Bless.
But
it would be great,
if we'd at least KNOW about it.
(apologies for the caps Jesus)

Please Lord,
Talk to us.
Even briefly (we know you are pretty busy)
Is he OK?
Just say
OK.
Is he alive?
Just say
OK.
Let us know.
Your humble servant,
Yours in You,
always
Wide-Open*
Amen."

* (you obviously have to change the name to your own, otherwise the prayer might not work - the Lord has a very effective prayer-spam filter )

Psalm 81:10:
I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-13-2009, 04:49 PM
Amen indeed. Someone told me that there might be a secret "mission trip" in progress to a place called the Mustang Ranch? Heck, I guess even horses need to be witness to the Word of the Lord. God bless the comittment of that great man Zeke.

DO NOT ask questions! Just tithe. A LOT!
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Default Re: What happened to Pastor Ezekiel? - 01-14-2009, 01:23 PM
Zekala is in good hands.

He's just talking to our people and raising some extra finance so that BibleThumbing Shiksa will have extra sweet wine at her wedding,

Hymie

1 Thessalonians 2:14 ... the Jews:
2:15 Who both killed the Lord Jesus, and their own prophets, and have persecuted us; and they please not God, and are contrary to all men: 2:16 Forbidding us to speak to the Gentiles that they might be saved, to fill up their sins alway: for the wrath is come upon them to the uttermost.
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