[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Now this is really strange, Nephew Zebulun was leaving UCLA Medical Center where he had been preaching to the dying when he called me on his cell ‘phone to say that he would be coming round tomorrow. The time was around 1.50pm.

He said he was in parking lot near the hospital because there were crowds of reporters around the front, and these were his word,

“So I’ll be back home in LBC’s penthouse in about a few hours or so. I’ll call you then, the battery on this thing is dying.”

I was about to reply when Zebulun broke in,

“Hey, I’ve just seen Michael Jackson running to a limo, he’s…” and the phone cut off.

I thought no more about it until I heard the news. I then rang the phone in the penthouse constantly until Nephew Zebulun answered. I asked him if he were sure he’d seen Jackson. He said,

“Sure it was him, a thin darkie chap, small nose awful complexion, long hair, big dark shades. He did one of them moon-walk things before he got in the limo.”

I asked if he had heard any news today. He said he hadn’t. He’d been listening to Gospel songs on the CD player.

I asked if he'd taken a photo - he reminded me in no uncertain terms that his 'phone had died (unlike Jackson?)

Now there’s nothing wrong with Zebulun’s eyesight… I don’t know what to make of this and neither does he.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

I've been hearing some strange reports as well Brother Bathfire. From what I understand, the alleged body of Michael Jackson (currently in a private room at UCLA "Ronald Reagan Memorial Hospital") was reported as weighing 325 pounds at the moment of death.

Brother BJ and his boys in security are following up on a couple of other things...

[TC Patriot]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

I've been hearing some strange reports as well Brother Bathfire. From what I understand, the alleged body of Michael Jackson (currently in a private room at UCLA "Ronald Reagan Memorial Hospital") was reported as weighing 325 pounds at the moment of death.

Brother BJ and his boys in security are following up on a couple of other things...

Did somebody kill Rush!

[Tertius The Scribe]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

I've been hearing some strange reports as well Brother Bathfire. From what I understand, the alleged body of Michael Jackson (currently in a private room at UCLA "Ronald Reagan Memorial Hospital") was reported as weighing 325 pounds at the moment of death.

Brother BJ and his boys in security are following up on a couple of other things...

I thought these transvestite freaks consumed the innocence of young boys (now with fewer calories)? They aren't supposed to weigh over eighty pounds!

Could this be another Jooish plot like the so-called "Holocaust"?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Apparently he has been seen in a motel in Fresno just a few minutes ago.


What's going on here?

[Mad Prophet Helmholtz]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

Apparently he has been seen in a motel in Fresno just a few minutes ago.


What's going on here?

WHY IS THIS NOT ON TV??? I've heard from sources on the internet that Jackson is still ALIVE? Apparently he faked his death because he was nearing bankruptcy and wasn't able to fulfill the obligations of the upcoming London concert series. The man had every motive to fake his death.

WHY IS THE NEWS NOT REPORTING THAT NOBODY ACTUALLY SAW JACKSON DIE? Why did the Doctor that started to say something about "It's a hoax" be suddenly subdued by security guards in the background of a live report this afternoon?

What's with the cover-up??? I'm not sure he even died after hearing all of this.

EDIT: I just tried to go to a blog claiming Michael Jackson faked his death and provided timestamped pictures of JACKSON TAKEN JUST TWO HOURS AGO. Now it is offline?!?!?! WHAT IS GOING ON?!?!?! Something is very very fishy about all this.

[Buford T Scoggins]

I'm absolutely certain that MJ faked his death just to avoid criminal prosecution (again) for molesting children.

He may have bleached himself white, but the plastic surgeons couldn't remove his darkie molester's genes.

The only way to be cured of pedophilia is to pray to Jesus. Ted Haggard was able to cure himself of homoism this way.

Michael, I know you're reading this, so just remember: You can run from Jesus, but you can't hide!

Hallelujah!
Brother Buford

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

This is almost unbelievable. Nephew Zebulun was in Fort Lauderdale with his constant companion and secretary, Mrs Honey, on Monday. Miss Honey was photographing the Fort Lauderdale Memorial Hospital where they had been agreeing terms on body parts, when she saw a black clad figure getting out of the marked vehicle. She put her camera on telephoto but I’m afraid she’s not the best photographer in the world…

I ask fellow True Christians™ to consider who the person emerging might be and why he would visit a medical center…

[Pastor Ezekiel]

We have reports of MJ being seen at "Mall of America" just an hour ago! He was with a team of Mormon bodyguards, which can't be a good sign.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

We have reports of MJ being seen at "Mall of America" just an hour ago! He was with a team of Mormon bodyguards, which can't be a good sign.

I heard witnesses reporting that his fingernails have grown out quite long and he was using Kleenex™ to touch everything.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

I hear he's been spotted in Bahrain!

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer

I hear he's been spotted in Bahrain!

That figures, there's a direct flight from Orlando to Bahrain http://www.skyscanner.net/flights/or...ida.html?rtn=1

[JoeJackson]

Micheal really is dead. I made sure of it when Isaw his body.

Those sightings are his surgical doppleganbangers. Thy filled in for him when he was scheduled to do an appearence but wanted to to stay inside Neverland with a sleepy time visitor.

[Brother Temperance]

I have absolutely no idea what's going on here, but I am 100% confident that it's another Jew conspiracy. Maybe they're going to ship him to Palestine to use as a secret superweapon against the towelheads?

[Nobar King]

[Pastor Ezekiel]

I was just contacted by a True Christian™ in Dusseldorf who reports that Michael Jackson has been sighted there, posing as a Gypsy.

[JoeJackson]

Just wanted to remind all the fine folks of Landover, I still got tickets to tomorrows big showmemorial. Half price and VIP parking for Landover True Christians. It is my way of giving back. There will be gift pavilions located throughout the event where you can purchase some fine memorabilia like:
the trademark glove ($35.00, $30.00 to folks from Landover)
the yid curly cue ($25.00, $23.00 to folks from Landover)
the bad ass hat ($95.00, $80.00 to folks from Landover)
And my personal favorite, the Michael Jackson "Stages of my Life" mask collection. Each mask is an accurate duplication (made from molds of his actual face) of MJ's facial appearance. These are true to life professional items, not dollar store knock-offs. Wear one of these and your friends will truly think they have seen a ghost. I've been wearing one from time to time over the last few days, the laughs I get a are priceless. Hehehe, my favorite was when I lay down on the table in the LA autopsy room. I shoved MJ back in the cooler, Jermaine (he is such a wuss) came in to see Michael. I sprung up and went boo! Hehehe, that boy went as white as MJ. I know this is what Micheal would of wanted, to see people laugh, I am doing my best to carry on his legacy. Now, being these here masks are so life like they even fooled a family member, they are not cheap at $950.00 a set ($875.00 for you folks). The original price was supposed to be much higher but I found some Chinky folks that could do it on the cheap. Apparently there was some Hasbro toy factory that got shut down last fall that was just sitting there.

Now, to purchase any of these items, simply use the Landover Pay Pal system (locate at the bottom of your screen). Being the money is coming in though Landover, we will automatically provide these fine items at the special price. And, if you act now and but them all, you may take an additional 10% off your order. Please, do not forget to include S&H.

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

After faking his race,sex (i.e. gender,potency,preference, adnauseium), talent. and so on and on and on. What else is there left but to fake his death. What was your first clue ? He is most likely hiding in Miami in the Somoza compound with Idi Amin,Elvis,Jim Morrison,Andy Kaufman and who knows who else.

[father yella]

he was nothing but a wierdo kiddy fiddling freak show anyway.

[Don Bozo el Guapo]

Maybe we should start a pool on how long it takes before Latoya brings out her newly discoverd twin sister.