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Default Men: Is this a good investment? - 12-23-2010, 05:31 PM

I saw this commercial on TV and thought it might be too good to be true.

I read the fine print and yoy get a single $2 bill for only $10 (plus a reasonable $5.95 processing fee) and then you qualify for another FREE $2 bill (as long as you pay another reasonable $5.95 processing fee.) So you get TWO $2 bills for only $21.90!!

This sounds too good to be true for such a Godly thing as a brand new set of US two dollar bills. Is it?


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a goog investment? - 12-23-2010, 08:25 PM

Are you referring to those collector bills with the gold leaf applique?

Pretty spiffy enhancement of Godly US American currency, if you ask me. One step closer to getting the country back on the gold standard. I bet Palin has that on her list!!


Jud 1:15 To execute judgment upon all, and to convince all that are unGodly among them of all their unGodly deeds which they have unGodly committed, and of all their hard [speeches] which unGodly sinners have spoken against him.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a goog investment? - 12-23-2010, 09:15 PM

Private message to Brother Gabriel
-NO others may read this-


Brother Gabriel, don't be too hasty to invest in this wonderful opportunity.

I have an idea that may result in you coming into possession of a nice little stack of these bank notes with only a modest investment of time.

While researching in my law library, I came across State v Warbucks, 1942, 4th District.

Mr. D. Warbucks as found guilty of war profiteering and was sentenced to a short prison term. The prosecutor, citing e pluribus unum homo erectus, demanded the death penalty.

Upon appeal the supreme court had the prosecutor shot and handed down guidelines for creative sentencing.

Now, here's where you come in. We haul people into court and demand their fines be paid in the two dollar bills you're looking at. They sit in jail until Fedex shows up with the boxes of currency.

You get paid your normal fees plus a performance bonus for lousy representation and I carve out some "modest" court costs.

Win-win.


The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court

"Credo elvem etiam vivere"
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Default Re: Men: Is this a goog investment? - 01-06-2011, 03:29 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
I saw this commercial on TV and thought it might be too good to be true.

I read the fine print and yoy get a single $2 bill for only $10 (plus a reasonable $5.95 processing fee) and then you qualify for another FREE $2 bill (as long as you pay another reasonable $5.95 processing fee.) So you get TWO $2 bills for only $21.90!!

This sounds too good to be true for such a Godly thing as a brand new set of US two dollar bills. Is it?

Personally, I don't carry anything less than a c note. I will just say this, have you ever heard the expression queerer than a two dollar bill?
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 01-11-2011, 02:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
This sounds too good to be true for such a Godly thing as a brand new set of US two dollar bills. Is it?
There has to be some kind of catch. There's no such thing as a free lunch, unless you are with Jesus witnessing a miracle (Mark 8:1-9).


6
A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
"But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-11-2011, 09:06 PM

Well when you put it that way, I'd just go right ahead and order the maximum number of $2 bills! More for me and less for those Godless GEEKS who collect money just to kill time before they're cast into the pits of hell for relying on ScIeNce.

I'm going to order mine right now! : jesus::j esus:
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-11-2011, 10:15 PM

What is wrong with you people. It's a scam run by New England Mint, they're a private company not affiliated with the U.S. Government, the U.S. Treasury nor the Federal Bureau of Printing and Engraving. Do you even know what you're actually buying? I know Christians are gullible by nature but stop and think about this.

On second thought, order all you can from these people. They're guaranteed to only go up in value. In a few years you'll be rich beyond your wildest dreams. And feel free to send me $99.95 for the advice plus a $19.95 processing fee.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 12:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheAtheist View Post
What is wrong with you people. It's a scam run by New England Mint, they're a private company not affiliated with the U.S. Government, the U.S. Treasury nor the Federal Bureau of Printing and Engraving.
What is wrong with you Atheists? Just because you have no morals you assume everyone else to have no morals either. That's disgusting!


50 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 12:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
What is wrong with you Atheists? Just because you have no morals you assume everyone else to have no morals either. That's disgusting!
Steady now, not all atheists are immoral surely? I would agree with his statement, if it seems to good to be true it probably is.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 12:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
What is wrong with you Atheists? Just because you have no morals you assume everyone else to have no morals either. That's disgusting!
Quote:
Originally Posted by wisseoldswami View Post
Steady now, not all atheists are immoral surely? I would agree with his statement, if it seems to good to be true it probably is.
Whoa, careful there. Looking at the statistics, you and your Christian friends are much more likely to end up in prison than me and my Atheist friends.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 12:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheAtheist View Post
Whoa, careful there. Looking at the statistics, you and your Christian friends are much more likely to end up in prison than me and my Atheist friends.
You're no better than a fundie when you start creating those 'us and them' mentalities. P.s. your likelihood to commit a crime is correlated with your spiritual beliefs? Post these statistics please.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 01:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wisseoldswami View Post
Post these statistics please.
Why?? They're not in the Bible so what do you care?
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 01:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheAtheist View Post
Why?? They're not in the Bible so what do you care?
1. You assumed I was a Christian
2. You assumed I follow the Bible verbatim
3. You assumed I can't also have a casual interest in statistics?
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wisseoldswami View Post
1. You assumed I was a Christian
2. You assumed I follow the Bible verbatim
3. You assumed I can't also have a casual interest in statistics?
My apologies.

http://www.holysmoke.org/icr-pri.htm
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:05 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheistAtheist View Post
Please note that there are no Baptists on that list.

True Christians™ in prison: 0%
Hell bound sinners in prison: 100%


50 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheistAtheist View Post
No worries.

I've seen your statistics. Did you consider the fact there are more Catholics than atheists in the US? Obviously there will be more in prison.

The sample is the population of a religious country, so it makes sense there are more religious people in prison.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wisseoldswami View Post
No worries.

I've seen your statistics. Did you consider the fact there are more Catholics than atheists in the US? Obviously there will be more in prison.

The sample is the population of a religious country, so it makes sense there are more religious people in prison.
Of course I've considered that. Catholics make up roughly 24% of Americans while Atheists make up roughly 12-15% of Americans. I think even with those numbers the percentages still speak volumes.
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by PhilTheistAtheist View Post
Of course I've considered that. Catholics make up roughly 24% of Americans while Atheists make up roughly 12-15% of Americans. I think even with those numbers the percentages still speak volumes.
Touché. Alright, I'll admit there are some fairly interesting stats there.

"Not unexpected as a result. Note that atheists, being a moderate proportion of the USA population (about 8-16%) are disproportionately less in the prison populations (0.21%)"

Dayum son
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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:40 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wisseoldswami View Post
Touché. Alright, I'll admit there are some fairly interesting stats there.

"Not unexpected as a result. Note that atheists, being a moderate proportion of the USA population (about 8-16%) are disproportionately less in the prison populations (0.21%)"

Dayum son
This is because when all of the millions of atheists finally get caught and jailed for their beliefs, they are subjected to our ministries as a captive audience, as sponsored by the government. By the time the pollsters come around we have converted the sinners to Christ because tehir prison experience has led them away form the sinful life of atheism that led them to prison in teh FIRST place. You DO know that correlation does not mean causation, right? Or don't atehists take statistical analysis in school?


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Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

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Default Re: Men: Is this a good investment? - 02-12-2011, 02:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabriel Reproba View Post
This is because when all of the millions of atheists finally get caught and jailed for their beliefs, they are subjected to our ministries as a captive audience, as sponsored by the government. By the time the pollsters come around we have converted the sinners to Christ because tehir prison experience has led them away form the sinful life of atheism that led them to prison in teh FIRST place. You DO know that correlation does not mean causation, right? Or don't atehists take statistical analysis in school?
So you're saying time in prison is a purifying experience, that leads people away from their sinful refusal to believe in a deity?

"the sinful life of atheism that led them to prison in teh FIRST place" atheism is not a crime. I would contest you on the point that atheists have 'no morals'.
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