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Default Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 06:28 PM

Greetings friends! Your forum seems very friendly and warm. I have been reading many things for the first time, and I am worried. I think I might be going to hell! My girlfriend and I have been togethor for almost three years. I am 22 years old, and we met at university (studying engineering and science). We are both really happy, and it's cool because my partner is also my best friend in this world. We have other close friends though (guys and girls). Should I be worried about this? She also has her own car, mobile telephone and a really good job (she is finished university now). She is often late home from work, which is OK because I trust her lots. We are night-time people, so there's still plenty of time to catch up on what is happening in one anothers lives and heads I am a good cook, so I generally have dinner waiting when she arrives. However, I read your forums correctly - I shouldn't be doing this!!How do I make her look after me better? Do my washing, cook and clean? We've always just shared these duties. I tried talking to her about it just now (night-time in Australia), but she said something about womens rights? Instead she suggested we go and have sex in the shower togethor (nothing in the butt). I always find sex with her satisfying and relaxing, but I am still sitting here worried she isn't taking good care of me!What should I do? I am really anxious! Does this make me evil?Many thanks in advance -Aussie
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 08:13 PM

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Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Greetings friends! Your forum seems very friendly and warm. I have been reading many things for the first time, and I am worried. I think I might be going to hell! My girlfriend and I have been togethor for almost three years. I am 22 years old, and we met at university (studying engineering and science). We are both really happy, and it's cool because my partner is also my best friend in this world. We have other close friends though (guys and girls). Should I be worried about this? She also has her own car, mobile telephone and a really good job (she is finished university now). She is often late home from work, which is OK because I trust her lots. We are night-time people, so there's still plenty of time to catch up on what is happening in one anothers lives and heads I am a good cook, so I generally have dinner waiting when she arrives. However, I read your forums correctly - I shouldn't be doing this!!How do I make her look after me better? Do my washing, cook and clean? We've always just shared these duties. I tried talking to her about it just now (night-time in Australia), but she said something about womens rights? Instead she suggested we go and have sex in the shower togethor (nothing in the butt). I always find sex with her satisfying and relaxing, but I am still sitting here worried she isn't taking good care of me!What should I do? I am really anxious! Does this make me evil?Many thanks in advance -Aussie
So are you fornicating with a harlot or did you rape a virgin and still didn't do the right thing?

Either way reppent, correct your ways and embrace CHRIST OUR SAVIOUR!

PRAISE THE LORD!
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 08:16 PM

Women are there to cook, clean, and make Godly Children. Not to stand up for "womens rights".
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 10:59 PM

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Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Greetings friends! Your forum seems very friendly and warm. I have been reading many things for the first time, and I am worried. I think I might be going to hell! My girlfriend and I have been togethor for almost three years. I am 22 years old, and we met at university (studying engineering and science). We are both really happy, and it's cool because my partner is also my best friend in this world. We have other close friends though (guys and girls). Should I be worried about this? She also has her own car, mobile telephone and a really good job (she is finished university now). She is often late home from work, which is OK because I trust her lots. We are night-time people, so there's still plenty of time to catch up on what is happening in one anothers lives and heads I am a good cook, so I generally have dinner waiting when she arrives. However, I read your forums correctly - I shouldn't be doing this!!How do I make her look after me better? Do my washing, cook and clean? We've always just shared these duties. I tried talking to her about it just now (night-time in Australia), but she said something about womens rights? Instead she suggested we go and have sex in the shower togethor (nothing in the butt). I always find sex with her satisfying and relaxing, but I am still sitting here worried she isn't taking good care of me!What should I do? I am really anxious! Does this make me evil?Many thanks in advance -Aussie
Your woman works outside the home? She's educated? What on earth attracted you to this succubus in the first place, my drunken blackfella friend?


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God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 11:17 PM

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Originally Posted by Cheshire View Post
Women are there to cook, clean, and make Godly Children. Not to stand up for "womens rights".
Women also do what they are TOLD by men.

Did you read in the title of this section where is says MEN ONLY?

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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 11:19 PM

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Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Greetings friends! Your forum seems very friendly and warm.
Indeed we are, although the warmth and genuine love you feel is simply our Lord Jesus Christ shinning through us. So, on to your problem. From time to time we receive letters such as yours, and it always breaks our heart to have to tell you the truth, but our Lord wouldn't have it any other way. Let me slip into the vernacular speech of today's youth, for a moment, so that my meaning will be clear to you: You're pussy-whipped. Nothing but an abject slave to your johnson and to Satan, who has obviously deceived you into thinking that your hellish life-style is A-OK. It's not. You must turn the strumpet out; fall upon the ground with all your body's weight, that even your very patella would cry out in agony to God and beg for His mercy; and only thence can you begin a regimen of regular tithing to Landover Baptist Church. I've asked the Church Secretary to contact you by PM to obtain your account numbers.


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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-30-2008, 11:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Greetings friends! I am a good cook, so I generally have dinner waiting when she arrives. However, I read your forums correctly - I shouldn't be doing this!! Does this make me evil? Many thanks in advance -Aussie
No, it makes you queer. Cooking is women's work.

And since when did you knuckle draggers start cooking your maggots? I thought you ate them raw.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-31-2008, 03:18 AM

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Originally Posted by see_the_light View Post
So are you fornicating with a harlot or did you rape a virgin and still didn't do the right thing?

Either way reppent, correct your ways and embrace CHRIST OUR SAVIOUR!

PRAISE THE LORD!
The right thing?

Please, tell me more? Who do I see or where do I go?
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 01-31-2008, 03:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Larry Lee View Post
Indeed we are, although the warmth and genuine love you feel is simply our Lord Jesus Christ shinning through us. So, on to your problem. From time to time we receive letters such as yours, and it always breaks our heart to have to tell you the truth, but our Lord wouldn't have it any other way. Let me slip into the vernacular speech of today's youth, for a moment, so that my meaning will be clear to you: You're pussy-whipped. Nothing but an abject slave to your johnson and to Satan, who has obviously deceived you into thinking that your hellish life-style is A-OK. It's not. You must turn the strumpet out; fall upon the ground with all your body's weight, that even your very patella would cry out in agony to God and beg for His mercy; and only thence can you begin a regimen of regular tithing to Landover Baptist Church. I've asked the Church Secretary to contact you by PM to obtain your account numbers.
Amen. Many thanks for your advice. Now I see the answer to my above-posted question. Your Secretary has not been in touch at this time. Does the Church accept paypal? I'm not verified yet, I hope that is acceptable.

Another important question: Am I able to keep the same partner having now repented? As you may have gathered from my original post, I've grown in like her some. She is reasonably complaint at times - can I just shape her personality and habits to suit myself, or is it too late? Also - how do I satisfy the cravings of my... uh... Johnson?

With regard to the maggots, maggots aren't really a preferred dish anymore. They're rich in many things essential for the body though, so we do eat them when forced by hunger. Cooking or burning just enhances the flavour, especially when glazing is used. The taste and cooking method it similar to a thanksgiving Turkey.
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 02-03-2008, 12:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Amen. Many thanks for your advice. Now I see the answer to my above-posted question. Your Secretary has not been in touch at this time. Does the Church accept paypal? I'm not verified yet, I hope that is acceptable.
Just click on the Paypal button at the bottom of this page and we'll take it from there. Don't be cheap and don't rob Jesus, ok?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
Another important question: Am I able to keep the same partner having now repented? As you may have gathered from my original post, I've grown in like her some. She is reasonably complaint at times - can I just shape her personality and habits to suit myself, or is it too late? Also - how do I satisfy the cravings of my... uh... Johnson?
She isn't white is she? Jesus is disgusted by miscegenation.

You might want to check these verses:

Genesis 24:3, Genesis 28:1, Exodus 34:12-16; Deuteronomy 7:3,4, Joshua 23:12, Exodus 34:16; Deuteronomy 7:4; Joshua 23:12,13, Judges 3:6,7

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aussie_Abo View Post
With regard to the maggots, maggots aren't really a preferred dish anymore. They're rich in many things essential for the body though, so we do eat them when forced by hunger. Cooking or burning just enhances the flavour, especially when glazing is used. The taste and cooking method it similar to a thanksgiving Turkey.
I'm glad to hear that you creatures are learning some civilization. Do you use utensils yet? Have you graduated to Godly American Velveeta cheese and/or Spam?

p.s. Don't forget about that Love Offering to Jesus you promised.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-02-2008, 10:37 PM

if i were you i would get down on my knees and thank your god for this relationship with a sucessful, clever and independent woman.
and i wouldnt try to pervert it by adopting the opressing ways of this commuinity.

quote the bible all you want, women are not inferior to you and nothing will ever change that.

-Awaiting the inferno-
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-03-2008, 04:51 AM

You guys are wackos, heres a thought, if your relationship was going fine before you visited this site, then just dont listen to it. women are people, and it has been proven that there are more impovrished men in the world than women. WHERES YOUR GOD NOW
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-03-2008, 05:19 AM

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Originally Posted by Larry Lee View Post
Indeed we are, although the warmth and genuine love you feel is simply our Lord Jesus Christ shinning through us. So, on to your problem. From time to time we receive letters such as yours, and it always breaks our heart to have to tell you the truth, but our Lord wouldn't have it any other way. Let me slip into the vernacular speech of today's youth, for a moment, so that my meaning will be clear to you: You're pussy-whipped. Nothing but an abject slave to your johnson and to Satan, who has obviously deceived you into thinking that your hellish life-style is A-OK. It's not. You must turn the strumpet out; fall upon the ground with all your body's weight, that even your very patella would cry out in agony to God and beg for His mercy; and only thence can you begin a regimen of regular tithing to Landover Baptist Church. I've asked the Church Secretary to contact you by PM to obtain your account numbers.
wow. just wow. sexism in this forum. that's new!. to the original poster of this thread, join my cause if you believe that there is something wrong with these responses.
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-03-2008, 01:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WinkingInTheNameOf View Post
if i were you i would get down on my knees and thank your god for this relationship with a sucessful, clever and independent woman.
and i wouldnt try to pervert it by adopting the opressing ways of this commuinity.

quote the bible all you want, women are not inferior to you and nothing will ever change that.

-Awaiting the inferno-
Fortunately, he is not you. There is nothing at all in the bible that women (other than witches, queens and harlots) should earn money. As far as inferiority is concerned, you will note that God made Eve as a “helpmeet” to Adam – He did not create her equal. There is also some debate as to whether women have souls – but that is probably above your head.

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Originally Posted by marilynmanson View Post
You guys are wackos, heres a thought, if your relationship was going fine before you visited this site, then just dont listen to it. women are people, and it has been proven that there are more impovrished men in the world than women. WHERES YOUR GOD NOW
We are interested in saving souls, the small time allotted to man on this planet is in mere preparation for the life to come. As far as impoverishment is concerned, I think you will find that your statistics are open to question and several questions were not asked. That aside, there are many Godless people on the planet, and this is the main cause of poverty.

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wow. just wow. sexism in this forum. that's new!. to the original poster of this thread, join my cause if you believe that there is something wrong with these responses.
This is not sexism – this is the Word of God – if you have a problem with it, you have a problem with God – if you have a problem with God, you’re going to burn.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

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Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-04-2008, 03:07 AM

Okay, wait. You guys said cooking was for women and you're a homer if you cook. So what about the professional chefs that make gormet meals and stuff? Can we make an excuse for them because some of the food is really good and I don't want to give it up.

BTW, how do you LBC guys know so much about the Bible? It's like you have a quote for everything! And why don't other forums and churches use the same versus? They just ignore us when we ask the controversial questions like sexism and slavery and rape and abortion and killing witches and gays and joos in the Bible.
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-04-2008, 06:41 AM

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Originally Posted by Baphomet View Post
Okay, wait. You guys said cooking was for women and you're a homer if you cook. So what about the professional chefs that make gormet meals and stuff? Can we make an excuse for them because some of the food is really good and I don't want to give it up.

BTW, how do you LBC guys know so much about the Bible? It's like you have a quote for everything! And why don't other forums and churches use the same versus? They just ignore us when we ask the controversial questions like sexism and slavery and rape and abortion and killing witches and gays and joos in the Bible.
Well, if I went up to Gordon Ramsay and told him he's gay, he'd probably punch my face in, but that's another story.

p.s Hi Matt!
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Baphomet Baphomet is offline
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-05-2008, 12:06 AM

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Originally Posted by Magikarp View Post
Well, if I went up to Gordon Ramsay and told him he's gay, he'd probably punch my face in, but that's another story.

p.s Hi Matt!
Yeah. But a lot of queers punch people in the face.

Hi!
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-09-2008, 11:07 AM

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Originally Posted by Magikarp View Post
Well, if I went up to Gordon Ramsay and told him he's gay, he'd probably punch my face in, but that's another story.

p.s Hi Matt!
The gutter mouthed Ramsay. He picks his victims and will reduce them to tears if possible but will back off and become "all reasonable" if it looks like he has hooked a feisty one.

Has the cunning of Satan that man. We really should do a thread just on him.

Note to the congregation: I do not watch him as I do not own a television. I just have this trash pushed on me when I walk past an electrical store.




Exodus 22:18
says, "Suffer not a witch to live." Deuteronomy 18:10 says, "There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch."
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-09-2008, 01:26 PM

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Originally Posted by Baphomet View Post
Okay, wait. You guys said cooking was for women and you're a homer if you cook. So what about the professional chefs that make gormet meals and stuff?

Yes - very astute indeed my young sinful poster! Queer, queer, queer - only women and queers are to preparest cakes of bread or other sustenance or vittles as we all them where I live (and serve Baby Jesus).


Isaiah 36.12 - But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
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Default Re: Womens rights? Help with my lady - 05-09-2008, 02:59 PM

There are a few exceptions to the cooking thing. IMHO it is okay for a man to roast a pig over an open pit, fry a fish over a campfire or cook steaks on a grille.

The men I know would never allow a woman near their Weber!


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