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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
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I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 06:19 AM
Brethren and cisterns, as you surely recall, I have recently been laying on the graves of noteworthy, deceased pastors and soaking up their powerful anointings.
I never did get my Dodge Aries running again, but I have been riding Megabus and Greyhound hither and thither, and I most recently arrived in Baxter Springs, Kansas, where I sought out the grave of preacher Charles Fox Parham.
I had heard Parham had been a great and powerful evangelist, and when I lay on his grave, I was electrified by the sensation of his anointing entering my body and mind!
What I had not realized was that Parham had been the leading proponent of speaking in tongues in the modern era. And now that his anointing is within me, I can never predict when the Spirit might take hold of my mouth and I might begin COBANDI COSANDAS AIYEEET BRIGANZAS COBANDI COSANDAS BRIZZAS SOEBEGECHA MOAT GEZURE!
Oh my, it happened just then! I did not expect this, but it seems I am typing in tongues! I do not know what this Heavenly language means, but God knows what it means, and that's what's important. Praise Him!
AYATH MGANDLIE CHIZENGER COBANDI COSANDAS GORENGER SENTAI SIBANDAS! MPEGLAR BIMBATHA YUGOLNUCKS BRIZANTHA! WHO DIS ECHMAN OOP OOP ON DET NEG? VISH PALA ENG? AYE AYE OOO PERSUS! AYE AYE OOO TATTO!
Friends, this is extraordinary! The Holy Spirit is literally speaking through me! COMBANDY COSANDAS COBANDI COSANDAS In light of this clearly miraculous occurrence, may I humbly suggest we convene a meeting of church elders ALAS QUATTRO CAN TOO TAN TAN YO MALEBOGE to discuss the possibility of elevating me to the rank of deacon, or perhaps even youth pastor?
Just something to think about.
MENTAX MENGARES URANTIA BOLUSAR AYEET AYAT BRONE BIGGATH SHIN YESTA COBANDI COSANDAS
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 07:24 AM
It seems as though too much pentecostalist has soaked in. God already knows what everything means, including in languages not yet discovered, but Tongues® is a very specific gift.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
I do not know what this Heavenly language means, but God knows what it means, and that's what's important.
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I Corinthians 14
27 If any man speak in an unknown tongue, let it be by two, or at the most by three, and that by course; and let one interpret.
28 But if there be no interpreter, let him keep silence in the church; and let him speak to himself, and to God.
Often, when heretics get together, they'll stop reading at a convenient point to suit their appetite – for tongues in this case. But imagine if their appetite was for witches? They could start reading Samuel and go along nicely to chapter twenty-eight, discerning that God was with King Saul who did the following:
I Samuel 28
7-8 Then said Saul unto his servants, Seek me a woman that hath a familiar spirit, that I may go to her, and enquire of her. And his servants said to him, Behold, there is a woman that hath a familiar spirit at Endor. And Saul disguised himself, and put on other raiment, and he went, and two men with him, and they came to the woman by night: and he said, I pray thee, divine unto me by the familiar spirit, and bring me him up, whom I shall name unto thee.There is some discussion but eventually the witch gets on with it.
After a while, Saul starts to wonder how her experience is going? 13 And the king said unto her, Be not afraid: for what sawest thou? And the woman said unto Saul, I saw gods ascending out of the earth.
14 And he said unto her, What form is he of? And she said, An old man cometh up; and he is covered with a mantle. And Saul perceived that it was Samuel, and he stooped with his face to the ground, and bowed himself.
If that's where they stop reading, just about anything becomes possible for heretics. Whatever they fancy, the witch will accommodate. Wriggling about on the ground in front of spirits? Taking advice from the wizard when he turns up for his cut? Following his recommendations on where other witches may be found – and going there? Pentecostalists are heretics not because of the parts of Scripture they follow but because of the parts they ignore.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 09:04 AM
Oh dear. Brothers and sisters, God has put a terrible knowledge on my heart!
COMBANI COSANDA BRELK ASPRITITO
He has shown me our dear friend MitzaLizalor has a daemon whispering in her ear!
METAZULA BRING SHASKA ASPARENTA MIG SOLOO ASKARATAKA
Why, I can see the daemon now! I can see it as plainly as if it were made of flesh and blood! It is sitting on Mitza's shoulder and whispering in her ear!
EGTOOLIO VARANTHA SAHCRAS PARAMAHANSA FAL FAGREETI
The daemon is filling Mitza's head with lies, and telling her to speak against me!
Pray for our sister MitzaLizalor! Pray, pray, pray for Mitza! She is under attack!
Out, daemon, out! I rebuke you in the name of Jesus Christ who died and was resurrected!
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 09:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
Pentecostalists are heretics not because of the parts of Scripture they follow but because of the parts they ignore.
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I remember going to a Pentecostal church when my siblings and I were very young. Father took us when mother was ill because he had heard from a friend that there was a healer in that congregation.
Not long after the sermon had started did one woman get up and scream bloody murder and started dancing and running about speaking gibberish. The congregation very quickly became a mass of writhing bodies while we sat there terrified. At one point an adult male grabbed my arm and started shaking me and I truly thought it was the end and I started to cry.
Needless to say, father took us out of there post-haste. We all went back home and prayed non-stop until my sister fainted late that evening from lack of food.
Certainly a nightmare-inducing spectacle.
1 Corinthians 7:10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 01:22 PM
While it is not my place to judge Christians, or tell lies about them for that matter, this is a Baptist fellowship where Scripture is followed and God requires the person interpreting and the person tonguing to be two different people. It does not mean we can't do tongues. Perhaps if I visited you with either the deaconess or a senior Pastor (according to Church requirements) one of us could see whether interpretation is possible?
Pentecostalists do not read Scripture in context. Many of them look like they're having fits. Lady Eveline's experience confirms what can happen when tongues get out of control and she's lucky it wasn't a spiritualist so-called "church" where Saul's example was being followed by freaks who stopped reading too soon. Clearly, not everyone has this fault.
So I'm happy to post Scripture but as far as other comments go, that's not my place and I'll let The Bible speak for itself. Pentecostalism is the antithesis of this and the antithesis of God's Perfect Love. All He wanted was to love Israel but the king (Saul) would not execute His Fierce Wrath upon the Amalekites (so He could fulfil His promise regarding the land) so that was it. What choice did God have but to bring down the Philistines with maximum prejudice, kill the king's sons, kill the king (and the king's servant for good measure) because they wouldn't love Him back.
I Samuel 28:18-19; 31:3-6
I could never be a Pentecostalist.
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 03:30 PM
A gift of tongues is something to celebrate and be grateful for. One who is especially gifted in tongues is Rev. Robert Tilton.
Bob Is Going to Pray In Tongues For a Moment - YouTube
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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An old soul
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 04:41 PM
It all sounds like jiggerish to me but apparently it's a real language. I found this example of speaking in Tongan on youtube - it's so uplifting for the natives to see and hear a white man making their gutter sounds. It gives them hope.
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 08:52 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole
It all sounds like jiggerish to me but apparently it's a real language. I found this example of speaking in Tongan on youtube - it's so uplifting for the natives to see and hear a white man making their gutter sounds. It gives them hope.
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I notice that the audience is laughing ... are they laughing with him or at him? And do they even speak Tonganish? We never see them, so for all we know, he could be speaking to an audience of Eskimos! Or (more likely) Chinamen, who fear being seen as humorless and laugh at anything they don't understand.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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An old soul
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 09:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
I notice that the audience is laughing ... are they laughing with him or at him? And do they even speak Tonganish? We never see them, so for all we know, he could be speaking to an audience of Eskimos! Or (more likely) Chinamen, who fear being seen as humorless and laugh at anything they don't understand.
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Sister, I can understand you may have drifted off but around the 3:30 mark the camera does pan the crowd against a backdrop of grunting and animal noises from the stage. It's precisely as you expected: eskimos.
Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-25-2023, 09:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Anthony J. Toole
Sister, I can understand you may have drifted off but around the 3:30 mark the camera does pan the crowd against a backdrop of grunting and animal noises from the stage. It's precisely as you expected: eskimos.
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Strangely immobile, though - almost like cardboard cutouts.
Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-26-2023, 01:44 AM
Oh my, that powerful anointing seems to be wearing off, and I now realize I have spoken out of turn.
My dear, dear friends, I am so deeply sorry for my behavior. I never meant to speak any heresies here in our Godly forum COMBANDI COSANDAS AYAT MOAG NMEFLI MEFEELI MON EXPREGSAYYY much less slander a devoted servant of the Lord like MitzaLizalor!
I have repented and asked Jesus to forgive me, and I beg all of you to please find it in your hearts to forgive my HOOO DIS ECHMAN OOP OOP ON DAT NEG very unfortunate behavior.
I love you all, and now that the Parham anointing has worn off, I promise you will hear no more speaking in tongues from me!
DISHWELLAT WELLWALLA AYE AYE OOO PERSUS AYE AYE OOO TATTO CTHULHU FHTAGN PARA ENOCH OOOK OOOK OOGLY SHEM OOOK OOOOK OOOGLY SHEMHAMFORASH DRIZZ VELOCE VERMI BRAGANZA HORTH TAGO MUGA MIN FEELY ME BONEY MOG REN BENSE VIG MEATA
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Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-26-2023, 01:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Eveline
I remember going to a Pentecostal church when my siblings and I were very young. Father took us when mother was ill because he had heard from a friend that there was a healer in that congregation.
Not long after the sermon had started did one woman get up and scream bloody murder and started dancing and running about speaking gibberish. The congregation very quickly became a mass of writhing bodies while we sat there terrified.
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And it is for that reason that The Lord guided the Apostle Paul's hand (with extra firmness, I do not doubt) to write:
1 Corinthians 14:34
“Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.”
His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.
Guns For God and the Economy
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
01-26-2023, 05:35 AM
You know, I did smile but underneath there was a sadness. For a while I had to accompany what would be best described as a p!mp themed "gospel" tour, the guy would get up on a table in various houses of ill repute and shout out his message. It consisted mainly of describing what he thought was taking place elsewhere on the premises (or in low dives nearby) and I must say, the locals must have been pretty fit & agile & resistant to poisons if half of what he said was true.
He was from out of town himself, as was the band accompanying him on brass instruments + bass, but my point here is that a woman leapt up gesticulating wildly and crying out her sins. She approached the altar [i.e. bar temporarily repurposed since this was a den of iniquity not an actual church] and broke down completely. On the floor she wailed and sobbed accompanied by what sounded like a trombone and the boss kept right on, louder now, urging those not actually inside to GET OUT OF THE HOUSES OF ("p" word) he could probably be heard some distance away PUT DOWN THAT (various, according to venue) AND GO BACK TO YOUR FAMILIES which was probably the last thing the families wanted from what he described. Anyway, every time it was the same woman.
They were probably some sort of nondenominational group and they weren't doing tongues at any of the meetings I saw. The nightmares induced by Lady Eveline's traumatic experience of tongues without interpretation will perhaps be lessened with the possibility of her broken lady being a paid actor —— after all, it was not a Baptist congregation —— although obviously if she was mimicking a spiritual gift but contradicting God in the process, demons are very likely.
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True Christian™
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
08-28-2023, 07:15 PM
As many of you know, I am in California studying miracle working ministry. I visited San Francisco last weekend to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ among the sodomites in the Fidel Castro district.
I ran across a negro in their disgusting BART subway system. I thought that negro was praying in tongues, but it turned out he was just talking in "Ebonics" to a friend over a bluetooth headset. Why can't those people learn English?
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Re: I have the gift of tongues! -
09-02-2023, 02:22 PM
I don't know what BART is but very often when foreign-sourced individuals learn a new language, they limit their vocabulary to the same number of words as were available before. Say if in a savage tongue there were 300 words. In your language, they'd only know 300 of your words, approximate translations I suppose but in my experience they seem more-or-less picked at random. A more sophisticated savage, perhaps not even a savage but a mere heathen, could have thousands of words available to translate. Let's say 100,000 distinct gabbling sounds signifying as many different concepts. (I'm not sure if heathens get as far as "concepts.") But you get the idea. Nothing you say can ever be translated into their language—beyond a vague approximation—yet everything they have will be understood by you once translated because you have words available to do that.
When mimicking the nuances of a vocabulary in the millions, vocal inflections are substituted. Where you'd employ adjectives or subjunctive moods, analogous words or even synonyms, they have nothing. And as long as you can't understand them they'll be happy. It seems like a real win/win. Nothing they have to say is worth listening to and the incomprehensibility of their mouth noises means you don't have to wonder if they've come up with anything.
Unfortunately they assess you in the same way using equivalent criteria gleaned from whatever words they do have. It informs their actions. We know they're addressing issues resolved centuries ago and now we've moved on to helicopters and nuclear submarines, delicacies out-of-season in every supermarket, deliveries to the home using optical communications and artificial body parts. Perhaps savage drums or heathen smoke signals would constitute telecommunication, sure: they cover distance and convey information. But it's the same information you heard in the "disgusting BART subway system" which is why Jesus used neither. God is Jesus and He said this:
Zephaniah 3:8, 9 Therefore wait ye upon me, saith the LORD, until the day that I rise up to the prey: for my determination is to gather the nations, that I may assemble the kingdoms, to pour upon them mine indignation, even all my fierce anger: for all the earth shall be devoured with the fire of my jealousy. For then will I turn to the people a pure language, that they may all call upon the name of the LORD, to serve him with one consent. You understand His sense of indignity but clearly we're still waiting for everyone to adopt the pure language He's made ready for us to share among those who'll listen. Probably not in San Francisco though.
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