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Sinner My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-13-2019, 08:31 PM

As a reward for having five sons, my husband built me a beautiful Menstra-Hut after the last one. It was the envy of our neighborhood. However, when I went out this morning to make use of it, it was gone! I have suspicions on who it might be - like that skank Kathy Lee Loudermouth who lives down the road. I've seen her eyeing my Hut. She's jealous because mine has air conditioning and heating, and hers only has a wood burning stove. My husband is heading down to her house right now to check around for my Hut.



In the meantime, I have nowhere to go during this delicate time. Any suggestions?


Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-13-2019, 08:46 PM

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Originally Posted by Dana723 View Post
In the meantime, I have nowhere to go during this delicate time. Any suggestions?
I'd suggest you head straight down to Kathy Lee Loudermouth's place and refuse to leave. If she won't let you in (and in her shoes, I wouldn't) then plant yourself right in the middle of her lawn and shout at passers-by that she has made you menstruate in public. That will teach her!


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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-13-2019, 09:02 PM

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Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
I'd suggest you head straight down to Kathy Lee Loudermouth's place and refuse to leave. If she won't let you in (and in her shoes, I wouldn't) then plant yourself right in the middle of her lawn and shout at passers-by that she has made you menstruate in public. That will teach her!
Good idea! I'll get my boys to make some signs too.


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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-14-2019, 09:03 AM

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Originally Posted by Dana723 View Post
As a reward for having five sons, my husband built me a beautiful Menstra-Hut after the last one. It was the envy of our neighborhood. However, when I went out this morning to make use of it, it was gone! I have suspicions on who it might be - like that skank Kathy Lee Loudermouth who lives down the road. I've seen her eyeing my Hut. She's jealous because mine has air conditioning and heating, and hers only has a wood burning stove. My husband is heading down to her house right now to check around for my Hut.



In the meantime, I have nowhere to go during this delicate time. Any suggestions?
Maybe this is Jesus’ way of telling you that the change is on the way or that you might medically need a hysterectomy.

I think jumping to the conclusion that Jesus is NOT involved is showing quite the hubris in you.

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-14-2019, 04:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles View Post
Maybe this is Jesus’ way of telling you that the change is on the way or that you might medically need a hysterectomy.

I think jumping to the conclusion that Jesus is NOT involved is showing quite the hubris in you.

YIC
You are right, of course, Dr. Niles. How silly of me not to think of that. Perhaps I let my hormones get the best of me. My husband is at this moment building me a new Hut, although it will be more of a shack, so I have been humbled by this experience.


Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered?
1 Corinthians 11:13
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Jesus Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 04-14-2019, 10:27 PM

It's comforting to know this kind of thing would never happen in Freehold. Because of his wisdom, Mayor Hold established the Dept of Menstra-Hut Security, which falls under the Freehold Department of Homeland Security, which of course is led by Donald Trump himself indirectly. (I mean, Donald can't be bothered by your womanly problems, can he?)


Even if your Loudermouth neighbor didn't take it, you should think of disguising it so people wouldn't want to steal it. No one likes a braggart, least of all about your Napkin Nook.


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 02-14-2020, 12:22 AM

I just caught up on this now. I don't think about these matters much, but if you're Menstra-hut is missing, shouldn't you just hold it in until you can get a new one?
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Default Re: My Menstra-Hut is Missing! - 02-14-2020, 07:31 AM

This is a disconcerting event, and you might want to check social media - stealing Menstra-huts might be trending. The homeless might be stealing these and be found in the shithole cities in Commiefornia like Los Angeles and San Francisco, or Seattle and Portland.

Certainly file a police report, and check your insurance policy to see if it is covered. If you wind up needing to replace it, you might look into those prepper bomb shelters - they might have a Menstra-hut model.


Hell's foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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