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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 12:48 AM

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Originally Posted by ultima View Post
Zekey likes the woman on woman.
For your information ms. know-it-all, I have been hard at work writing a lengthy Pastoral paper on the abomination of lesbeanism amoungst the young and nubile. My research has taken me into places that might turn even your demon stomach!

Don't try and drag me down into the gutter that you live in.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 01:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Sister, I have a rather urgent request. Would you please continue with your testimony? You were just getting to the part that interests many of the True Christian™ Brothers, in our never ending quest to understand the "ups and downs" of what goes on in these hellacious convents full of nubile young lezbean nuns. PLEASE, PLEASE continue your narration, that we might read and re-read (in our prayer closets) the specifics of the perversions you were forced to indulge in. Leave no details out.

Waiting anxiously with a circle of earnest, excited Brothers, faith as hard as a rock for Jesus....

Hurry please!



YIC

--Zeke



Aaah jeez - NOW look what you did,Sister! Got them all stirred up.


"Religious fervour" my....um...elbow. Nothing a cold shower won't sort.


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 01:58 AM

Forgive me, but if we make nuns illegal won't the Cathylick priests have an excuse for diddling the altar boys? Or is there something I don't understand?


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 09:25 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
Forgive me, but if we make nuns illegal won't the Cathylick priests have an excuse for diddling the altar boys? Or is there something I don't understand?
I'd always believed that Priests needed no excuse for Boy diddling, Mama Glendie. They do what comes naturally to them.
Female Cattlickers have always been in a safer position than Boys when it comes to Priests.
Obviously, we'll need a Man to come along and clarify this situation.



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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 11:25 AM

I understand that nuns get a ring when they take their vows and that it signifies that they are married to Jesus. Now with all these nuns married to Jesus it strikes me that at the very least this qualifies as against the laws of bigamy and is reason enough to make them illegal. As to what all this cloistering is all about, I can only hazard a guess as to it being some kind of orgiastic abomination. I'm not sure what else could come from a whole convent of nuns all thinking they are married to the same man.


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 12:53 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WilliamJenningsBryan View Post
I understand that nuns get a ring when they take their vows and that it signifies that they are married to Jesus. Now with all these nuns married to Jesus it strikes me that at the very least this qualifies as against the laws of bigamy and is reason enough to make them illegal. As to what all this cloistering is all about, I can only hazard a guess as to it being some kind of orgiastic abomination. I'm not sure what else could come from a whole convent of nuns all thinking they are married to the same man.
I believe the art of Ring Kissing has been perfected within the Cattlicking Faith and the term "would you like to Kiss my Ring?" is more than a little popular among Priests.

Yet more proof (if needed)




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being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 05:10 PM

This is why i love islam our headscarf wearing woman, covered breading machines. Always protect your machines against pollution from the outside (and one of the benefits, you cant see the bruises from the pedagogic punches).


Rom. 16:17: Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.
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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 06:12 PM

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Originally Posted by lilith View Post
Nothing a cold shower won't sort.
You do know that's a popular myth, don't you? OK, from reading here you seem to know quite a few unshowered Ukranians, so your vision might be skewed, but still.

All this innuendo, when will it stop?


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-09-2008, 11:53 PM

I'm having trouble understanding why a -Sister- is saying that nun's should be illegal. As far as I'm aware 'sister' is a name given nun's, it is associated with nuns and catholics.

Are you in fact catholic Talitha?
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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-10-2008, 02:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wide-Open View Post
You do know that's a popular myth, don't you? OK, from reading here you seem to know quite a few unshowered Ukranians, so your vision might be skewed, but still.

All this innuendo, when will it stop?


A "popular myth" huh? And you know this HOW?

I still maintain that a drooling,overexcited moro...um..bloke will cool his ardour when sprayed with an ice cold fire hose.
Don't take my word for it - ask Zeke. I understand he's used a similar method on his furry friend in the basement.


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-10-2008, 04:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Sister, I have a rather urgent request. Would you please continue with your testimony? You were just getting to the part that interests many of the True Christian™ Brothers, in our never ending quest to understand the "ups and downs" of what goes on in these hellacious convents full of nubile young lezbean nuns. PLEASE, PLEASE continue your narration, that we might read and re-read (in our prayer closets) the specifics of the perversions you were forced to indulge in. Leave no details out.
Oh dear, sweet, innocent Pastor Zeke. I remember when I first came to Landover, the debriefings of my time spent wasting my womb for the pope and the horrendous goings on in the convent were so shocking, you and the other pastors would get red and agitated and constantly have to excuse yourself to get a few minutes of fresh air. But I had no idea that you blocked the horror of it from your memory, or that the whole thing was recorded for future study and the training of up-and-coming young pastors in fighting the evils of the papacy!


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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-10-2008, 03:29 PM

Nuns are gay..Nuff said.


''and among the lampstands was someone "like a son of man,"dressed in a robe reaching down to his feet and with a golden sash around his chest.


Small segment of Revelation 1:13 Daniel 7:13
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Default Re: NUNS. SHOULD THEY BE MADE ILLEGAL? - 01-11-2008, 01:25 AM

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Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
Oh dear, sweet, innocent Pastor Zeke. I remember when I first came to Landover, the debriefings of my time spent wasting my womb for the pope and the horrendous goings on in the convent were so shocking, you and the other pastors would get red and agitated and constantly have to excuse yourself to get a few minutes of fresh air. But I had no idea that you blocked the horror of it from your memory, or that the whole thing was recorded for future study and the training of up-and-coming young pastors in fighting the evils of the papacy!


They're definitely UP,anyway...so - he calls them "debriefings" now?


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