The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
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Posts: 8
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Location: Florida
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Hi -
09-17-2012, 06:37 AM
This is my introduction to landover baptist. I've been going to church 3 times a week for as long as I can remember so I decided why not join a baptist forum.
You guys seem to be a bit rough but you're only following the bible I see
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,442
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 06:51 AM
Dear Friend,
Welcome. Have you ever rubbed Gov. Rick Scott's shiny bald head for luck? I sat next to him at a fundraiser once and the glare was intolerable.
Yours in Him,
BAB
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Posts: 8
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Location: Florida
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 06:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Bob
Dear Friend,
Welcome. Have you ever rubbed Gov. Rick Scott's shiny bald head for luck? I sat next to him at a fundraiser once and the glare was intolerable.
Yours in Him,
BAB
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No? That is...
Strange.
Never been to Tallahassee actually so never had a chance I guess but I wouldn't even if I had the chance.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
No? That is...
Strange.
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OK, but you know what I mean about the glare, right?
Look at this lady squint in this picture!
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:02 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Bob
for luck?
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I dont want to burn my bridges but it has been well instilled in me that the Bible is against luck.
Quote:
I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create
evil: I the LORD do all these things. Isaiah 45:7
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we can deduce from this that only resisting sinful acts may we be in Gods grace, certainly not rubbing any heads for luck! there is no such thing as luck only Gods will.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,442
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:13 AM
Dear Friend,
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
I dont want to burn my bridges but it has been well instilled in me that the Bible is against luck.
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Oh, pish. The apostles cast lots when they wanted to decide who to take the place of Judas among the apostles. Acts 1:26. They trusted in a game of luck to reveal the will of God. Go teach your grandma to suck eggs (and completely mark her ballot).
Quote:
we can deduce from this that only resisting sinful acts may we be in Gods grace...
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Actually, the converse. Only by the grace of God can we resist sinful acts. Our resisting sinful acts does not somehow entitle us to God's grace. Ephesians 2:8. Are you sure you've been to church before? Maybe it was a Universalist Unitarian prayer yurt?
Yours in Him,
BAB
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Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
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Posts: 14,181
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: With my nose stuck in the Bible.
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:14 AM
What a great verse. I just love Isaiah 45.
You seem like the good sort. How many future Republicans has your wife borne you?
Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
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Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,223
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Thong-infested Florida©
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
I dont want to burn my bridges but it has been well instilled in me that the Bible is against luck.
we can deduce from this that only resisting sinful acts may we be in Gods grace, certainly not rubbing any heads for luck! there is no such thing as luck only Gods will.
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Oh?
(Ecclesiastes 9:11) "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."
Yours in Christ,
Z. Smyth
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True Christian™
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:17 AM
Dear Brother,
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levi Jones
You seem like the good sort. How many future Republicans has your wife borne you?
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Actually, this "Christian" is a woman. Who has somehow missed 1 Timothy 2:12.
Yours in Him,
BAB
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Location: Florida
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levi Jones
What a great verse. I just love Isaiah 45.
You seem like the good sort. How many future Republicans has your wife borne you?
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I do not take with any political parties, there is no point because by the time I am old enough to vote the America we know is going to be not a democracy, but a theocracy under God.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zechariah Smyth
Oh?
(Ecclesiastes 9:11) "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."
Yours in Christ,
Z. Smyth
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I don't quite understand what that verse is trying to say, it's pretty confusing. What chance happeneth to them all?
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Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
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Posts: 14,181
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: With my nose stuck in the Bible.
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
I do not take with any political parties, there is no point because by the time I am old enough to vote the America we know is going to be not a democracy, but a theocracy under God.
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Amen. I like you. That's a nice sentiment, but we need God's Own Party to accomplish that.
You see, we believe the constitution is a sacred document second only to the Bible. Since the days of Reagan we have wholeheartedly supported the Republican Party. They mention Jesus a lot more than those demoncrats.
By us controlling the GOP primaries, we can move this once great nation to theocracy through (probably) peaceful means.
I hope that makes sense to you.
Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
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Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,223
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Thong-infested Florida©
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
I do not take with any political parties, there is no point because by the time I am old enough to vote the America we know is going to be not a democracy, but a theocracy under God.
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Hallelujah!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
I don't quite understand what that verse is trying to say, it's pretty confusing. What chance happeneth to them all?
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Read it again. Read it until you understand!
YiC,
Zech
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 08:26 AM
A hearty welcome to you, young lady! Why don't you post a picture of yourself so we'll be able to put a name to the face.
I like being able to visualize a person when I'm praying for her!
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Posts: 8
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Location: Florida
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 10:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Levi Jones
Amen. I like you. That's a nice sentiment, but we need God's Own Party to accomplish that.
You see, we believe the constitution is a sacred document second only to the Bible. Since the days of Reagan we have wholeheartedly supported the Republican Party. They mention Jesus a lot more than those demoncrats.
By us controlling the GOP primaries, we can move this once great nation to theocracy through (probably) peaceful means.
I hope that makes sense to you.
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Yeah it makes perfect sense.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zechariah Smyth
Hallelujah!
Read it again. Read it until you understand!
YiC,
Zech
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Well thats hardly reasonable, it'd be like me showing you my ASL homework and saying eventually you will understand it ( but you never will...)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
A hearty welcome to you, young lady! Why don't you post a picture of yourself so we'll be able to put a name to the face.
I like being able to visualize a person when I'm praying for her!
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There is one on my account I believe.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,442
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 11:44 AM
Dear Friend,
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
me showing you my ASL...
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Please keep your ASL to yourself.
Ugh,
BAB
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,729
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 04:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
This is my introduction to landover baptist. I've been going to church 3 times a week for as long as I can remember so I decided why not join a baptist forum.
You guys seem to be a bit rough but you're only following the bible I see
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Why not indeed!
Why call us "rough" if we're only following the Holy Bible?
Would you call God Himself "rough"?
Sounds like you make Him out to be a bit of a diva.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 05:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
There is one on my account I believe.
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Oh, you are a fine looking young lady! I'm puzzled that you're wearing glasses, though. Why haven't you asked the Lord to heal your astigmatism?
Also, I'm getting the impression that at the age of 15, you still aren't married? Don't they have any Christian men left in Florida, or is is all elderly Jews and Cuban dope lords now?
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 05:39 PM
Welcome friend, seems I a bit late to the party. To make a long story short, a field boss nigra got into a squabble with a beaner.
John 18:36
Jesus answered, My kingdom is not of this world: if my kingdom were of this world, then would my servants fight, that I should not be delivered to the Jews: but now is my kingdom not from hence.
Being you are living in joo land, you must see fignts all the time.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 8
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Florida
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Born Again Bob
Dear Friend,
Please keep your ASL to yourself.
Ugh,
BAB
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It's an abbreviation for american sign language, it's so we can talk to people who cannot hear, usually from birth or tramatic injury.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Why not indeed!
Why call us "rough" if we're only following the Holy Bible?
Would you call God Himself "rough"?
Sounds like you make Him out to be a bit of a diva.
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Yeah I would say God is pretty rough, one not to be messed with.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Faith_Machine
Oh, you are a fine looking young lady! I'm puzzled that you're wearing glasses, though. Why haven't you asked the Lord to heal your astigmatism?
Also, I'm getting the impression that at the age of 15, you still aren't married? Don't they have any Christian men left in Florida, or is is all elderly Jews and Cuban dope lords now?
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Wearing glasses because I cannot see properly and I used to pray for perfect 20/20 but there is no point, if God didn't hear me the first 20 times what makes you think he will the next? He probably has bigger problems
I dont plan to get married any time soon, also I havent seen any cubans ever. yeah florida does have the highest old person per percent in the US but I doubt the majority are jewish, christianity is very strong here in the south.
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Honorary True Christian™
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Re: Hi -
09-17-2012, 07:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Floridian Christian
Wearing glasses because I cannot see properly and I used to pray for perfect 20/20 but there is no point, if God didn't hear me the first 20 times what makes you think he will the next? He probably has bigger problems.
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So you're saying God refuses to hear your prayers.
This can only mean you are not a Christian, dear.
Matthew 21:22
And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.
That's Jesus speaking, there. He didn't say "If you ask for important things", but "all things".
I'm concerned that perhaps you do not believe. You know what happens to the unbelieving, right?
Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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