Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum
Reload this Page What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes?
Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Brother Gonzalez's Avatar
Brother Gonzalez Brother Gonzalez is offline
Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz"
True Christian™
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Friend of Jesus Ready for the Rapture Trump of GOD Hands Off Landover Mission to The Mexican Realms Mission to Messico Flat Earth True Christian™ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Donald Trump 2016! Babysitter Outreach preacher Touched by Jesus Ex-Mary Worshipper 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Alternative Facts Kirk Cameron Fan Club Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Righteousness Mower Crown of Life Probing for Jesus The Gonz GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Polling for Christ Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-03-2020, 08:12 PM

Hi everyone! I need a little help here.

I have a little fish bowl with 10 gallons of water, where I used to have 3 fishes (golden)


A miracle has happened, and Jesus has decided to multiply my fishes! I have 10 now! Even though they are small, I think they will grow and now I will need a bigger bowl.


Did this ever happened to you? It is the first time in my life where a miracle is going on in my own house. What do I do? Of course, I have prayed more than ever, without ceasing. But should I do something special? Should I call the media?


I think this is definite proof of the existence of Jesus and God. This little piece of information can change our lives, and I am so excited that I need your help to put up a plan to take this to the whole world. Or at least to America, the part of the world that counts!


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
upchucker67's Avatar
upchucker67 upchucker67 is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Facepalm The Dimmest Light of the Month Award Sissy Cry Baby The swine behind the pearl Negroe Poster Yellow peril Demonized Democrat Beastiality Perv Homer Potty mouth Caution - Poster is Crazy Langobard

 
Posts: 225
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Milton, PA
upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:09 PM

Theodynamics stipulates That the larger the volume of water, the greater probability for intelligent multiplication. Think of old ships in this way, lifeboats were attributed to old steamers based on gross tonnage, and not by passenger capacity. The bigger the ship, the more lifeboats multiplied. The rest of the deck space is equivalent to the respective cubic squares of water in the fish bowl displaced. The frequency of fishes will not overshoot this displacement.
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by upchucker67 View Post
Theodynamics stipulates That the larger the volume of water, the greater probability for intelligent multiplication. Think of old ships in this way, lifeboats were attributed to old steamers based on gross tonnage, and not by passenger capacity. The bigger the ship, the more lifeboats multiplied. The rest of the deck space is equivalent to the respective cubic squares of water in the fish bowl displaced. The frequency of fishes will not overshoot this displacement.
Not one word of that "explanation" mentions Jesus' role in the matter concerning Brother Gonzalez.


Is this "theodynamics" stuff supposed to help us understand God?


We here at Landover Baptist Church believe in the Holy Trinity, whereas "dynamics" references to the number two. . . I think.


I do know that "theo" refers to "God".


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Alvin Moss's Avatar
Alvin Moss Alvin Moss is offline
Serving Jesus
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Proud Niglet Sponsorer Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Sons of Liberty Porn Resistant Early riser Tell her once Persecuted Bronze Tither Punched the most queers Mission to Korea Trump of GOD True Republican Donald Trump 2016! 2015 Witch Hunt Award Prayer Warrior Kirk Cameron Fan Club Hands Off True Heterosexual™ 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Nuke of Heaven Crown of Glory Mower Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Crown of Incorruptibility Alternative Facts Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Gonzalez View Post
Hi everyone! I need a little help here.

I have a little fish bowl with 10 gallons of water, where I used to have 3 fishes (golden)


A miracle has happened, and Jesus has decided to multiply my fishes! I have 10 now! Even though they are small, I think they will grow and now I will need a bigger bowl.


Did this ever happened to you? It is the first time in my life where a miracle is going on in my own house. What do I do? Of course, I have prayed more than ever, without ceasing. But should I do something special? Should I call the media?


I think this is definite proof of the existence of Jesus and God. This little piece of information can change our lives, and I am so excited that I need your help to put up a plan to take this to the whole world. Or at least to America, the part of the world that counts!

God has provided you with bait fish and I believe He expects you to use them to catch larger fish, that you might eat them.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11

Last edited by Alvin Moss; 03-06-2020 at 02:46 AM.
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Joanna Lytton-Vasey's Avatar
Joanna Lytton-Vasey Joanna Lytton-Vasey is offline
True Christian™ Lady Extraordinaire, an Honorary Male Biblicist
 

Christian Love Heaven Bound Most Obedient True Christian Lady True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Kirk Cameron Fan Club Touched by Jesus Quiverful Cleanest Kitchen Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls One Year/1000 posts The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Grammar Nazi Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Mission to Messico Hands Off Saved 1 Year 2015 Witch Hunt Award In Love With Zeke Pro-Life Ex-eurotrash Persecuted Stamp of Approval Mower Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Crown of Incorruptibility God's chosen ones Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 8,762
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Surrounded by heathens
Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Joanna Lytton-Vasey will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Not one word of that "explanation" mentions Jesus' role in the matter concerning Brother Gonzalez.
Absolutely, Sister!
Quote:
We here at Landover Baptist Church believe in the Holy Trinity, whereas "dynamics" references to the number two. . . I think.
Or would that be binamics, whatever that may be? I thought dynamics was something to do with explosions. Either way, it is unhelpful here.


Brother Gonzalez, have you considered asking your wife to bake loaves in the proportion of 5 loaves to every 2 fishes?


Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
upchucker67's Avatar
upchucker67 upchucker67 is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Facepalm The Dimmest Light of the Month Award Sissy Cry Baby The swine behind the pearl Negroe Poster Yellow peril Demonized Democrat Beastiality Perv Homer Potty mouth Caution - Poster is Crazy Langobard

 
Posts: 225
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Milton, PA
upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
I thought dynamics was something to do with explosions. Either way, it is unhelpful here.
The overall fish pop. exploded, non?
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 10:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by upchucker67 View Post
The overall fish pop. exploded, non?
Is that an attempt at humor? God will not be mocked.


Galatians 6:7

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows that he will also reap.


It was God that chose to bless our Brother will more fish than which he started out. And it is to God that we look for our understanding.


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 11:01 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Gonzalez View Post
A miracle has happened, and Jesus has decided to multiply my fishes! I have 10 now!
Remarkable! The gift of life has appeared in your own home.
Quote:
Did this ever happened to you?
Never! Then I never kept fish. The nearest I got to living fish was when a friend went to Canada on a Salmon shoot.
Quote:
But should I do something special? Should I call the media?
Well... You have announced it on Landover, and so God knows what has happened, and, if He deems it necessary, He will send dreams to the multitude. As far as the "cash" side is concerned, unless one of the fish looks like Jesus, I don't see much profit.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-05-2020, 11:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
Remarkable! The gift of life has appeared in your own home. Never! Then I never kept fish. The nearest I got to living fish was when a friend went to Canada on a Salmon shoot.
Well... You have announced it on Landover, and so God knows what has happened, and, if He deems it necessary, He will send dreams to the multitude. As far as the "cash" side is concerned, unless one of the fish looks like Jesus, I don't see much profit.
A fish that looks like Jesus! You are so clever, Brother Bathfire.


I know that you have a reputation for being a fierce defender of the Faith and a tough teacher, but it is nice to see your lighter side.


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
Brother Gonzalez's Avatar
Brother Gonzalez Brother Gonzalez is offline
Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz"
True Christian™
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Friend of Jesus Ready for the Rapture Trump of GOD Hands Off Landover Mission to The Mexican Realms Mission to Messico Flat Earth True Christian™ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Donald Trump 2016! Babysitter Outreach preacher Touched by Jesus Ex-Mary Worshipper 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Alternative Facts Kirk Cameron Fan Club Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Righteousness Mower Crown of Life Probing for Jesus The Gonz GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Polling for Christ Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-06-2020, 12:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss View Post
God has provided you with bait fish and I believe Her expects you to use them to catch larger fish, that you might eat them.
Thanks for the enlightment, Brother. Your intelligence is remarkable. Texans are God's choice inside America, I believe so.


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
Brother Gonzalez's Avatar
Brother Gonzalez Brother Gonzalez is offline
Another brick in Donald´s wall - A.K.A "The Gonz"
True Christian™
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Christian Love Friend of Jesus Ready for the Rapture Trump of GOD Hands Off Landover Mission to The Mexican Realms Mission to Messico Flat Earth True Christian™ Guns, Guts and GLORY! Donald Trump 2016! Babysitter Outreach preacher Touched by Jesus Ex-Mary Worshipper 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Alternative Facts Kirk Cameron Fan Club Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Righteousness Mower Crown of Life Probing for Jesus The Gonz GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Polling for Christ Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 2,111
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ungodly South America
Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Gonzalez will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-06-2020, 12:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
Remarkable! The gift of life has appeared in your own home. Never! Then I never kept fish. The nearest I got to living fish was when a friend went to Canada on a Salmon shoot.
Well... You have announced it on Landover, and so God knows what has happened, and, if He deems it necessary, He will send dreams to the multitude. As far as the "cash" side is concerned, unless one of the fish looks like Jesus, I don't see much profit.
Please let me know if you dream about fishes. My fishes, specially.


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
upchucker67's Avatar
upchucker67 upchucker67 is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Facepalm The Dimmest Light of the Month Award Sissy Cry Baby The swine behind the pearl Negroe Poster Yellow peril Demonized Democrat Beastiality Perv Homer Potty mouth Caution - Poster is Crazy Langobard

 
Posts: 225
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Milton, PA
upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-06-2020, 12:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Gonzalez View Post
Please let me know if you dream about fishes. My fishes, specially.
Perhaps he sleeps with the fishes in his dreams.
Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
handmaiden's Avatar
handmaiden handmaiden is offline
Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
True Christian™

Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian True Christian Lady True Heterosexual™ Cleanest Kitchen Best Pie Best stoning bucket Bronze Tither Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient One Year/1000 posts True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Eats the Most Pork Ready for the Rapture Persecuted Christian Love Grammar Nazi Trump of GOD Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Teabag Patriot Trumpette Saved 5 Years Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Guns, Guts and GLORY! Alternative Facts Asked questions later Babysitter Marshmallow GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Polling for Christ Anti-Biden True Christian Beauty Chocolate Midget porn survivor Crown of Rejoicing

 
Posts: 11,341
Join Date: May 2010
Location: 39.373117/-76.472688
handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!handmaiden will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-06-2020, 12:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by upchucker67 View Post
Perhaps he sleeps with the fishes in his dreams.
Again with the jokes.
What exactly are you trying to do here, may I ask?


Have you, by any chance, decided to read this book?


It is actually the one thing that we are looking for in our forum visitors.


Even Didymus Much, who is as far from knowing The Lord as anyone, at least knows the Bible and is able to discuss it as it pertains to our purpose for maintaining this website in the first place.


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
upchucker67's Avatar
upchucker67 upchucker67 is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured

Facepalm The Dimmest Light of the Month Award Sissy Cry Baby The swine behind the pearl Negroe Poster Yellow peril Demonized Democrat Beastiality Perv Homer Potty mouth Caution - Poster is Crazy Langobard

 
Posts: 225
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Milton, PA
upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.upchucker67 is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: What to do if Jesus multiplies your fishes? - 03-06-2020, 01:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by handmaiden View Post
Again with the jokes.
What exactly are you trying to do here, may I ask?
I'm trying to be right with God everyday, and fellowship with you good people. I hope you enjoy my jokes. Remember --


Proverbs 17:22 A merry heart doeth good like a medicine:...(..)


There's no better medicine than Hucker humor, IMO. It got me through my corona.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
atheism is a hoax, fishes, god, jesus, miracle, multiply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved