Pastor,
At first I thought this was but a prank by a typical teenage homerboy to spite Christ and True Believers™. However, something bothered me about this issue and I looked into it in more detail.
...and it turned out this MUST be connected to the atheist God-mocking Star Wars Franchise! They have a
Dark Lord ('Darth Vader') and they have recently come out of the closet regarding their religion, Jediism. The youth with the blasphemous micturitionary-exhibitionist problem must have been a member of this cult that worships Satan in the form of the Dark Lord.
Suddenly everything becomes crystal clear.
This cult must have been present in hiding for centuries if not millennia. And in the 1970's they must have created the Star Wars franchise in order to gain respect and converts. And, of course, as is always the case with SATAN, without exceptions unless Jesus directly intervenes, it worked out. Gullible young youths are easily lured into cults that promise supernatural powers, peace, harmony, gender equality, fun and adventure.
The emblem of this cult is a
sick travesty of the
Cross.
And the cult has
followers: more than 120,000 Austrians and Kiwifruit are members!
And they are
mocking Jesus with the ultimate goal of
replacing Him with their own false god.
Urinating is, thus, the least of our worries. Being held in police custody is NOT adequate. This calls for
exorcism,
capital punishment, a nation-wide effort to suppress this
Dark Lord cult before millions of additional souls are lost into
HELL.
1 John 2:18 Little children, it is the last time: and as ye have heard that antichrist shall come, even now are there many antichrists; whereby we know that it is the last time.
Yours in Christ,
Elmer