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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 01-23-2014, 07:04 AM

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Originally Posted by lanDOVErchurch View Post
I will tell all of my Christian friends to never go to this ungodly website *shudders*
Before you do that, how about heading over to the Introduction Forum and tell us a little about yourself...we want to get to know you!

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 01-23-2014, 01:27 PM

Any so-called Christian site that makes Christianity look bad by donning the tin-foil hat in this way, is obviously a Jew run faction of the Opus Dei, likely using occult technologies to communicate with our reptilian overlords.


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 01-23-2014, 01:50 PM

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Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins View Post
Any so-called Christian site that makes Christianity look bad by donning the tin-foil hat in this way, is obviously a Jew run faction of the Opus Dei, likely using occult technologies to communicate with our reptilian overlords.
Is it the Lizard People you speak of?


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 01-24-2014, 10:51 PM

I realize the original post is almost a year old, but it still saddens me to think that people would make light of the sacred. Our Lord Jesus must have a heavy heart when people gather to mock His sacrifice, temporary as it was, just for some kind of cheap thrill.

Father always says, "There is no such thing as a cheap thrill, Naomi Ruth, because there is always a price to be paid eventually, and if you factor in inflation and other economic factors, payment due will exceed accounts received every time. The wages of sin is death." In fact, he just said it to me about ten minutes ago.

Glory to God for a father that loves Jesus.


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 04:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss View Post
Is it the Lizard People you speak of?
Nay. Flying Saucers and Lizard "people" are just demons that Satan sends up to the firmament in an attempt to distract us from constant prayer and worshipful acknowledgment of Christ's temporary sacrifice. Calling these abominations "people" is just feeding into their lies.

I once saw such a demon, while engaged in a violent orgy of snake skin condoms with the liberal cognoscenti of upstate New York, where Jews go to "get away" from the Big Apple during the terror attacks they orchestrate. They have an underground tunnel system (which smells like feces and reminds me of a sewer) where they participate in these uncouth rites of interdimensional passage.

The demon was shaped like a man, but had the tail of a lizard. He removed the tail from his body and cast it to the ground like the enemy sorcerers that God granted Moses victory over, before he killed Jesus on Golgotha, centuries after his death.

I beheld the foul beast's appendage, and saw that it had been transformed into a dildo. He then made it disappear. But this was not my first exposure to Satanic magic, which is nothing more than misdirection, as it turns out.

The shapeshifter produced a deck of playing cards, from an unknown point of origin, and asked me to cut the deck, which I did. He turned up the first card, and it was the seven of clubs. This disturbed me, because of what I imagined such a monster accomplishing with seven phallic icons (such as a club or any other bludgeon). The fear which I felt inside my anus eventually led me to Christ, but I digress.

The next card was a face card. The look of primal emotion on the monster's humanoid face informed me that this had all been in the cards since the deck itself was printed by Hoyle, at an unknown, perhaps unknowable point in the past.

One after another, the monster dealt each of us five cards, and we proceeded to play a game of poker for no money. I knew that my soul hung in the balance, and so I cheated, and won.

That is my only close encounter of the third kind, unless you count drug induced visions of extraplanar entities. Mostly, demons just hide in the sky, disguised as stars, which is why their numbers vary so much throughout the year.


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 04:19 PM

O Come Lord Jesus!

This is worrisome indeed! I'm glad you are safe (for now), Brother Billy Bob. I will continue to pray a hedge of protection around you, and especially around your anus.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 04:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
O Come Lord Jesus!

This is worrisome indeed! I'm glad you are safe (for now), Brother Billy Bob. I will continue to pray a hedge of protection around you, and especially around your anus.
+1

Brother Billy Bob's anus will be in my thoughts, as well.

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 05:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles View Post
+1

Brother Billy Bob's anus will be in my thoughts, as well.

YIC
And yours mine, brother.


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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 08:17 PM

Yes, we must vigilant in our watch against the machinations of Satan and his attacks against our posteriors.

Truly a disturbing vision, Brother.

I will pray for an angel of protection. I pray the Holy Spirit to loose a mighty warrior angel from heaven to nestle against your buttocks (with his back to you of course) to brandish his fiery sword against any demons who might try to assault your colon.


Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-21-2014, 11:30 PM

We can never be too forthcoming in our prayers for protection and succor in these end times. I have adapted Psalm 91 to pray for protection over Brother Jenkins' anus.
He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say this of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress:
my God; with Him, I know my sphincter is safe.
Surely He shall deliver thee from the tallywhacker of the florist,
and from other prancing nancies.
He shall wrap His big manly arms around you,
and against His bosom shalt thou cleave:
His Truth™ shall be thy shield and buckler.
Thou shalt not be afraid for thy anus by night;
nor being seduced by that cute checkout boy during the day;
nor for the AIDS that He sends against homosexurals;
nor for the prolapsed rectum that results from years of repeated, intense anal pounding.
Everywhere you go, unsaved homers will get huge boners thinking about your sphincter,
and ten thousand shall lust for your mouth as well;
but it shall not come nigh thee.

Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold
and see the reward of those who yearn for anal delights.
Because thou hast made the LORD, which is my refuge,
even the most High, thy habitation;
there shall no tallywhackers befall thee,
neither shall you get AIDS in some other way, like sitting on a toilet seat with cuts on your butt.
For He shall give His angels charge over thee,
to penetrate your heart and fill you with Jesus' love rather than penetrate your sphincter and fill your colon with gooey hot spunk.
He shall bear thee up in their hands,
lest you shake your tallywhacker more than five times, accidentally committing the grievous sin of masturbation.
Thou shalt tread up the bear and the twink:
God want let them rape you, He will instead send them to hell.

Because He hat set His love upon me, in a totally manly, non-gay way:
I will set Him on high, because He hath known I'm definitely not gay.
He shall call upon me, and I will answer Him:
I will be with BillyBob in trouble;
I will talk with him about our anuses and masculinity, and devise new strategies for defending his virtue.
With long life will I satisfy him (in a completely heterosexual, Godly way),
and shew him my gun collection.

In Jesus name I pray,
Amen.


II Thessalonians 1:7-9
And to you who are troubled rest with us, when the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven with his mighty angels,
In flaming fire taking vengeance on them that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power



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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-26-2014, 09:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jedediah View Post
I know I've led a sheltered life, well fairly sheltered, er..

So, have you been hanging around catholics recently? Your transcription has distinctly popish overtones. I used to read one of their false "bibles" until recently. They wrote it to deprave and corrupt. Sort of like The Plumed Serpent but I gave it up and now I witness for Christ. His historical Life and Resurrection demand a response, but popes glorify demons. Please do not slide down their slippery path. It leads to filthy lucre.

MATTHEW 6
19
Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:
20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:
21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
22 The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light.
KJV

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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 04-29-2014, 04:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jedediah View Post
We can never be too forthcoming in our prayers for protection and succor in these end times. I have adapted Psalm 91 to pray for protection over Brother Jenkins' anus.
He that dwelleth in the secret place of the Most High
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say this of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress:
my God; with Him, I know my sphincter is safe.
Surely He shall deliver thee from the tallywhacker of the florist,
and from other prancing nancies.
He shall wrap His big manly arms around you,
and against His bosom shalt thou cleave:
His Truth™ shall be thy shield and buckler.
Thou shalt not be afraid for thy anus by night;
nor being seduced by that cute checkout boy during the day;
nor for the AIDS that He sends against homosexurals;
nor for the prolapsed rectum that results from years of repeated, intense anal pounding.
Everywhere you go, unsaved homers will get huge boners thinking about your sphincter,
and ten thousand shall lust for your mouth as well;
but it shall not come nigh thee.

Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold
and see the reward of those who yearn for anal delights.
Because thou hast made the LORD, which is my refuge,
even the most High, thy habitation;
there shall no tallywhackers befall thee,
neither shall you get AIDS in some other way, like sitting on a toilet seat with cuts on your butt.
For He shall give His angels charge over thee,
to penetrate your heart and fill you with Jesus' love rather than penetrate your sphincter and fill your colon with gooey hot spunk.
He shall bear thee up in their hands,
lest you shake your tallywhacker more than five times, accidentally committing the grievous sin of masturbation.
Thou shalt tread up the bear and the twink:
God want let them rape you, He will instead send them to hell.

Because He hat set His love upon me, in a totally manly, non-gay way:
I will set Him on high, because He hath known I'm definitely not gay.
He shall call upon me, and I will answer Him:
I will be with BillyBob in trouble;
I will talk with him about our anuses and masculinity, and devise new strategies for defending his virtue.
With long life will I satisfy him (in a completely heterosexual, Godly way),
and shew him my gun collection.

In Jesus name I pray,
Amen.
Brother, I thank you deeply, for as I read this prayer, and felt God's will moving through the HTML, my anus relaxed for the first time since my stint in the Florida State Penitentiary, where I was raped constantly with janitorial equipment, kitchen utensils, improvised stabbing weapons, and huge negro penises, by the prison chapter of the homosexual negro fraternity known as "Down Low".


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Jesus Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 09-26-2015, 10:14 AM

I have a co-worker that is Church of God follower. I really do not know how to react to him. He can point to ALL Scripture for EVERYTHING the COG believes. It just seems like Seventh Day Adventist stuff to me.. It has since I met him. I am a long time Christian, but my biblical knowledge is little. Can you help me find more info on this ahnsahnghong and the COG. Also the WMSCOG. I am really having a problem with this as I do not want to offend him.... I just want to know the truth about them and his beliefs. Thanks

W. Michael Heslar
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 09-26-2015, 02:02 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by mountainmike57 View Post
I have a co-worker that is Church of God follower. I really do not know how to react to him. He can point to ALL Scripture for EVERYTHING the COG believes. It just seems like Seventh Day Adventist stuff to me.. It has since I met him. I am a long time Christian, but my biblical knowledge is little. Can you help me find more info on this ahnsahnghong and the COG. Also the WMSCOG. I am really having a problem with this as I do not want to offend him.... I just want to know the truth about them and his beliefs. Thanks




W. Michael Heslar

First, let me refer you to God's word on this matter. It can be found in Matthew 7:15, as well as in other scriptural verses. The Chinaman you refer to is one of several Chinamen (most notably- Reverend Moon, who was also a Korean Chinaman) who have claimed to be Jesus. They are all liars and have mostly descended to Hell. Other false Jesus' have shown up. David Koresh was one, Charles Russell (not the painter) was another. Reverend Russell is responsible for several cults, including the Church of God. You may remember David Koresh as the lunatic who was killed by President Bill Clinton's palace guard. Many attention seekers have, over time, pretended to be Jesus. I doubt they see the humor of that blasphemy now, as they float among the damned in the Lake of Fire.


Even Satan has had his imposters. Mrs. Carpenter, down in Poteet, comes to mind, but there have been many others.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 05-02-2016, 08:52 PM

Praise God for Him shining the light on these false Christians.


Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.



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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 03-31-2017, 05:59 PM

Quote:
I won't even link to their filth, because they say it's not appropriate for visitors under 18. They have pictures of aborted fetuses and articles celebrating 9-11 on their front page. Their website has attracted millions of visitors, which makes it a serious concern.
Don't you think this statement is misleading. I've read articles by this man and I've never concluded that this guy was celebrating 9-11. From what I've read he's always been interested in the truth about what happened on 9-11.


In addition, anyone who knows anything abortion knows that the #1 reason a woman will reconsider having an abortion or NOT is because her mind was changed by viewing graphic pictures.


So, if a woman changed her mind about abortion because she viewed graphic pictures on jesus-is-savior.com who are you to call that evil?


Peace!
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Alvin Moss Alvin Moss is offline
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 03-31-2017, 06:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AdryianBoydDodd View Post


In addition, anyone who knows anything abortion knows that the #1 reason a woman will reconsider having an abortion or NOT is because her mind was changed by viewing graphic pictures.


So, if a woman changed her mind about abortion because she viewed graphic pictures on jesus-is-savior.com who are you to call that evil?

I have quoted two of your statements above. They seem quite contradictory to me. Are you saying that you are for or against these filthy pictures?


Also, I am guessing you are some kind of conspiracy theorist. It is well known and proven that the Jesus hating Muslims flew those airplanes into our buildings. That is not any kind of issue for any right thinking individual. Are you crazy, or what?


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 03-31-2017, 06:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AdryianBoydDodd View Post
Don't you think this statement is misleading. I've read articles by this man and I've never concluded that this guy was celebrating 9-11. From what I've read he's always been interested in the truth about what happened on 9-11.
A bunch of God and America hating raghead terrorists happened. Were you in a cave and unable to hear about this?


Quote:
Originally Posted by AdryianBoydDodd View Post
In addition, anyone who knows anything abortion knows that the #1 reason a woman will reconsider having an abortion or NOT is because her mind was changed by viewing graphic pictures.

Where exactly does the Holy Bible say abortion is wrong? There are examples of God ordering the death of pregnant women. Numbers 31:15-18 for instance. But I am hard pressed to find anything that says not to murder babies. Exodus 21:22 says the abortionist must pay whatever fine the judges decide upon, but obviously God doesn't consider it murder, because the penalty for murder is death.


Or are you saying to believe you and jesus-is-savior.com over God? I'll take God's word for it, thank you very much, as will every REAL Christian.


Psalm 137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones.
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 03-31-2017, 06:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AdryianBoydDodd View Post
In addition, anyone who knows anything abortion knows that the #1 reason a woman will reconsider having an abortion or NOT is because her mind was changed by viewing graphic pictures.
This is absolute bile. The reason women do not go in for the abortionisms is because of Jesus Christ Himself!

The Bible(KJV1611) very clearly tells women that the only way to His side is through birthing many, many healthy boy childs: future soldiers of Christ.

1st Timothy 2:15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing , if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

If you're claiming that women prefer to see pictures of dead babies rather than praise Jesus you've got another thing coming, pal.

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Default Re: http://www.jesus-is-savior.com is a hoax. - 03-31-2017, 06:53 PM

Quote:
Also, I am guessing you are some kind of conspiracy theorist. It is well known and proven that the Jesus hating Muslims flew those airplanes into our buildings. That is not any kind of issue for any right thinking individual. Are you crazy, or what?
Conjecture.



Quote:
Or are you saying to believe you and jesus-is-savior.com over God?
Nonsense. I never implied that.
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