[Nobar King]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

I've been playing on and off for four years. I don't play all day, usually a few hours per week, if at all. Also I play a lawful good human fighter, a physical combat specialist with no magical abilities.

I don't believe you.

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

I don't believe you.

That's fine. I'm not trying to make this thread about me, just about how True Christians can safely play D&D.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

That's fine. I'm not trying to make this thread about me, just about how True Christians can safely play D&D.

What you are proposing is not possible. Read THIS before satan uses you any more.

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

What you are proposing is not possible. Read THIS before satan uses you any more.

Characters will die sometimes. Most people take it in stride and roll up another one. I don't know anyone who committed suicide as a result of D&D character death.

Also, if my GM came up to me and asked me if I wanted to learn to really cast spells, I would probably laugh in his face and tell him to learn to separate the game from real life.

[Bobby-Joe]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

Characters will die sometimes. Most people take it in stride and roll up another one. I don't know anyone who committed suicide as a result of D&D character death.

Also, if my GM came up to me and asked me if I wanted to learn to really cast spells, I would probably laugh in his face and tell him to learn to separate the game from real life.

Perhaps friend. But what if your GM had a hot female NPC offer herself to your female elf character (fighter/mage/thief)? Would you say no to that? Christian Socialists and Cultural Anthropologist have noted the exceptionally high occurrence of simulated same sex act with D&D characters.

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe

Perhaps friend. But what if your GM had a hot female NPC offer herself to your female elf character (fighter/mage/thief)? Would you say no to that? Christian Socialists and Cultural Anthropologist have noted the exceptionally high occurrence of simulated same sex act with D&D characters.

Personally I wouldn't accept the offer, but that is because I think that erotic roleplay is too often used by juvenile/socially awkward gamers, and I would rather tell an epic tale of heroism than a fantasy porn scene.

[Nobar King]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

I don't know anyone who committed suicide as a result of D&D character death.

Are you some kind of psychologist who studies why people commit suicide? How would you even know, unless the person left a note or something?

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Nobar King

Are you some kind of psychologist who studies why people commit suicide? How would you even know, unless the person left a note or something?

I don't know anyone who has committed suicide for any reason. Therefore, all the D&D players I have met have not committed suicide. Many have had one or more of their characters die. Oh, and I'm not a psychologist, just for the record.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

I don't know anyone who has committed suicide for any reason. Therefore, all the D&D players I have met have not committed suicide. Many have had one or more of their characters die. Oh, and I'm not a psychologist, just for the record.

You do understand how satan uses games like this to spread his teachings. I don't understand why anyone would spend so much time and effort defending such filth. You should be studying the Holy Bible, boy.

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

You do understand how satan uses games like this to spread his teachings. I don't understand why anyone would spend so much time and effort defending such filth. You should be studying the Holy Bible, boy.

I highly doubt Satan has influenced me through D&D, but if he has, he's doing a pretty lousy job of it. I've been playing for four years and not once have I joined a cult, cast a spell, or sacrificed a virgin.

What a model of efficiency Satan is.

My point is, if I can play D&D without being a pawn of Satan, I'm sure that those stronger in faith than I am can as well.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Originally Posted by Stormblade

I highly doubt Satan has influenced me through D&D, but if he has, he's doing a pretty lousy job of it. I've been playing for four years and not once have I joined a cult, cast a spell, or sacrificed a virgin.

What a model of efficiency Satan is.

My point is, if I can play D&D without being a pawn of Satan, I'm sure that those stronger in faith than I am can as well.

It seems to me that you are spitting in God's Loving face, and when nothing happens, you declare it a victory. IN HIS GOOD TIME Jesus will smite you mightily for wallowing in this filth, and you know it.

Satan is the father of lies, boy. When you appear before Jesus on bended knee come Judgment Day, do you really want to have to explain to Him why you helped spread satanism instead of rebuking it?

Better decide which team you're batting for.

[Stormblade]

Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel

It seems to me that you are spitting in God's Loving face, and when nothing happens, you declare it a victory. IN HIS GOOD TIME Jesus will smite you mightily for wallowing in this filth, and you know it.

Satan is the father of lies, boy. When you appear before Jesus on bended knee come Judgment Day, do you really want to have to explain to Him why you helped spread satanism instead of rebuking it?

Better decide which team you're batting for.

I wouldn't call any of what I've done a victory. I'm just a guy who can play D&D without engaging in Satanic activities in real life. It's not as though I've succeeded where so many others have failed. I think the reason that people believe D&D is Satanic is because a few kids who played D&D made the news for committing crimes. All the other D&D players who don't commit such acts are rarely or never discussed in the news because they don't do anything newsworthy; they're just regular people.

[James Hutchins]

Pal, now you listen here.

I could go watch wack jobs perform Satan's dances, view people performing acts of perversion with farm animals from a closet, converse with hookers, listen to politicians. All of this is the same as is your innocent play. But trust me when I tell you you are flirting with the Devil, Son. As is always the case, it goes from leering glances, to curious groping, to dipping the tip to all out debauchery. Curiosity killed the cat. The Devil knows how to tempt you like a $5 whore or a $6 goat. Take the D&D and toss it in a chipper. Run to Jesus and pray he forgives you.

[michelebachmannfan]

Originally Posted by James Hutchins

The Devil knows how to tempt you like a $5 whore or a $6 goat.

Why did God make goats more expensive than whores?

[Civil Protection]

Honestly, if you're trying to make a Christian alternative to D&D that is, in effect, Christian "D&D", you'd HAVE to use dice. Some of the alternatives posted would destroy the challenge and therefore the fun! However, I'd imagine to demote gambling you could put things similar to Casinos for gambling, and then make the rolls near/always impossible to succeed in any of the games, and make them lose a load of the currency you'd use in-game. It would deter kids away from gambling because it's really telling them that you almost never, ever win in gambling and when you lose, boy do you lose.

You would, of course, have to do something like this pretty quickly to get the whole "dice betting games are good" idea out of their heads; gambling addiction/promotion is a terrible thing. You could also insert "quests" to get these places shut down for one reason or another, be it housing satanists to rigging their games.

Hope I helped, I'm interested in seeing where this will go.

[James Hutchins]

Originally Posted by michelebachmannfan

Why did God make goats more expensive than whores?

Because a goat has more value.

Do not ask such stupid questions, You only confirm you are an moron when you do that.

[Brother-Jon]

Originally Posted by michelebachmannfan

Instead of ungodly dice or spinners, why not use divine inspiration? Let God speak to players about how many spaces they should move. Glory!

This is a great idea!
Additionally, why waste our time discussing on how to make a wholesome version of such an evil thing when we could just come up with our own game!
I have no doubt that God's Word can provide us with ample rules to enjoy a fun game of Saviors and Sinners! We don't even need to make up our own characters, His Word already has the perfect characters for you to choose from!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

A message from the high-priced joo lawyers at LBC:

"Saviors and Sinners" is a patented name belonging to Landover Baptist Church exclusively. So watch it, or you'll owe us money."

End of message.

[Paragon of virtue]

The possibilities of running a game of 'Saviors and Sinners' are endless. Without thinking much imagine the adventure in this scenario:

Head Pastor: You are at home studying your Bible when you hear a knock at the door. Upon opening the door you see two well dressed young, men holding what appear to be Bibles....What do you do?

Mordecai(played by Malachai): Mordecai uses his Christian Discernment skill to determine if these are True Christians.

Head Pastor: As these are Jehova's Witnesses(DC:9) and will fall somewhere between Scientologists (DC:1) and Mormons (DC:15) in their 'wolf in sheep's clothing' level, Malachai will need to roll a 9 or better on a D20 (or correctly answer nine Bible trivia questions out of twenty if you prefer to play dice free) in order to see through their deceptive lies.

<Malachai roles an 11! or answers the appropriate number of questions>

Mordecai(played by Malachai): I see through your lies Satan! Your so called 'Witnesses' are false prophets!! You sinners deny the existence of Hell and eternal punishment, but guess what? Hell is real and the two of you are going!! You believe that only a ruling class of 144,000, are allowed to go to heaven. I know the Lord said, "Whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. Romans 10:13!

<Mordecai has good answers for these charlatans, but he may not be out of the woods just yet>

Head Pastor Good Job! ...but there is an 85% chance that these two heathens are black or some other "oppressed minority". Roll Percentile Dice (D 100) you must get an '86' or greater for these cultists to be reasonable, yet still Hell-bound, Caucasians. [a dice free alternative would be a number of questions determined by the HP(Head Pastor) of which the PC(Mordecai as played by Malachai) must answer]

<Malachai rolls 50% or does not answer the required percentage of questions and the HP must now roll a D20 and consult the "inferior races" table (or simply choose the appropriate minority from the table when playing dice free)>

<The HP rolls a '6' (or chooses) Negroid from the list. He then rolls another D20 on the "shuckin' and jivin'" table and reads the following entry>

Head Pastor: The two cultists step back from your door with big toothy grins on their faces. Suddenly, they run off in two different directions...Make a 'racial perception' check DC 17!

Mordecai(played by Malachai): Oh, man...I should have known. I want to use my 'Wise as serpents, Harmless as Doves' daily power.

Head Pastor: I'll allow it.. that adds a +2 to your 'racial perception' check, but the Difficulty remains at 17

<Malachai rolls a '1' on the D20 or fails to answer a single Bible question, this is called a critical failure or fumble and results in dire consequences for the player>

Mordecai(played by Malachai): Rats!

<The Head Pastor consults the critical failure table and reads the following>

Head Pastor: While you were distracted by the two jigaboos at the front door, a third, yet unseen buck creeped up and stole (1 D4) pies that were cooling outside your window. What do you do?

Mordecai(played by Malachai): I think I'll go beat my wife for leaving the pies unguarded and having me answer the door in the first place..

...and that is only a small sample of the hours of good, clean fun that you and your family could have...once you read the Player's Guide, Head Pastor's Manual, and Sinner's Gazetteer! I just can't wait until the game gets a national release.

[Brother-Jon]

Originally Posted by Bob4God

If the devil can use "Dungeons and Dragons" to lure people into the occult, couldn't GOD use "Saviors and Sinners" to lure people into glory?

I was simply referencing Bob4God's use of the name.
I am glad to see you are way ahead of me!
Of course, I should have assumed already that LBC, being obviously Divinely Directed by The Savior, would have been on top of this from the get-go!

I have several greasy-faced, four-eyed, game-addicted, over-masturbatory students in my classes I have long suspected worship satan with this evil manipulative masquerade for sorcery.
I am sure they are fags together as well.
I understand oftentimes dungeons and dragons leads to gay orgies.
Are there any materials available for me to pass on to these youth at my church who I fear are in danger?