[Pastor Ezekiel]

Attention: After last years rousing success, all Ammo and gunsmithing done by Bobby-Joes Armory® on the corner of Esclattes and Deuteronomy Avenues will get a 10% discount with proof of paid to date Tithes and a valid Witch Hunting license for THIS year (this means you Nobar!) for all munitions and weapon tuning now through 10/25. This includes night vision scopes, re-barrelling, bump-stocks and Bobby-Joe's hand polished "No jam"100 round Mini AR15 barrel magazine.

Please note, there is a 25% stocking fee added to support the Pastors General discretionary fund. Remember, it is for the children.

I should not have to mention this however the hunt begins at Sundown 7:03 PM Saturday and ends at Sunrise 8:05 AM Sunday Bring proof with you to Church and hand it in to the ushers. You must have more than 51% of a witch to get credit. We will be checking for 'witches' with two right hands, left hands, feet or the rest.

Now lets all have some clean fun.

[I Man Rastafari]

This sounds like good and wholesome fun. Are Black men allowed to join in the festivities?

In Jamaica which is my home we often chase witches when we can find them and if we catch one we set them on fire. Everyone in the garrison will come to the event. It is so funny to watch them crackle and sizzle on the fire as if they were the sausages white people eat at their barbeques.

Jah Guide!
Trevor

[James Hutchins]

Terrific news, Pastor! Nothing brings a family together more than a good hunt and even more so, a good cause.

It is a shame about all the goth and emo people that were accidentally involved in past years festivities but as my dad used to say, 'if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and looks like a duck, hit it with both barrels' then bag and tag it.
I hope Bobby-Joe can get me a few pallets of .50 belt feed and provide a store credit of spent casings. That is a real money save for the Thrifty Christian®.
This coming Saturday, we will be doing weapons proficiency testing, mostly to see what caliber the little Hutchins can handle. We certainly do not want an eye taken out from recoil like we did a few years back. All that crying and hollering, it made it very hard for me to keep my spirits up, if not for Jesus to guide me. That and my gold plated 1911 (you know the one, the mother of pearl hand grips) action is still sluggish, there must be some goo still in the slide.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Before I buy airline tickets for my three eldest, can someone just confirm that crossbows are permitted? Thank you.

[James Hutchins]

Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey

Before I buy airline tickets for my three eldest, can someone just confirm that crossbows are permitted? Thank you.

Absolutely! Cross bows, sling shots, chains, rocks, caustic chemicals, rusty nails, pointy sticks, automobiles even bare hands for those with the desire to get their hands dirty.
My wife, Mrs. Hutchins got one by tricking it to stick its' head in the oven. Mrs. Hutchins held it tight while she preheated to 500 and the kicking stopped. It smelled something awful made quite the rukus (the witch, not my wife, she knew to keep her trap shut.) but my wife knew her place, in the kitchen, tending to my needs.


By the by, when your boys come over, I'd be honored to have them come and stay at the Hutchins Platation, LLC, no charge of course.

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Thank you, Brother Hutchins. It's so very tedious getting guns on to an international flight these days, and nobody wants to be disadvantaged by having to use an unfamiliar weapon. So that's a relief.

Originally Posted by James Hutchins

By the by, when your boys come over, I'd be honored to have them come and stay at the Hutchins Plantation, LLC, no charge of course.

That is very kind and the boys will be thrilled! They are so fond of Mrs Hutchins (and, of course, so respectful of you) that this will be a real treat for them. I can't thank you enough. If you ever want me to take a few of your girls off your hands, just send them over. Hannah would enjoy the company and we could certainly keep them busy and out from under your feet.

[Cranky Old Man]

It seems my "new" Panzerfaust arrived just in time.