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Reload this Page How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In?
Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow.

View Poll Results: Should I bash them with rocks or drown them slowly?
Bash their skulls! 46 24.60%
Drown them slowly! 99 52.94%
Other - Please explain 42 22.46%
Voters: 187. You may not vote on this poll

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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 02:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I hope you know, posting something like this just death metal screams animal cruelty I hope they lock your sadistic ass up and unleash the homosexual prisoners upon you when you drop the soap. Have a nice day :]
~ThatWiccanKid
Huh? Are you snorting the weed?
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 02:51 AM

The weed? Ohhh, a clever term for marijuana, of course. I'm pretty sure you inhale it through smoking, not snorting. As for me, I am straightedge, meaning I don't believe in the use of material substances for pleasure. As for you, I would highly recommend "hitting up the blunt" every chance you get, it might seriously help you.
~ThatWiccanKid
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I hope you know, posting something like this just death metal screams animal cruelty I hope they lock your sadistic ass up and unleash the homosexual prisoners upon you when you drop the soap. Have a nice day :]
~ThatWiccanKid
Perhaps I missed something in the Bible that tells me this is wrong? Could you point it out to me?


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 02:57 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I'm pretty sure you inhale it through smoking, not snorting.
This is one of the rare ocasions where I take junkie's word over Christians. I am 100% you have very good knowledge of abusing drugs.
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:00 AM

Oh yeah, you know it. Just me and Moses here, burnin' that bush...
~ThatWiccanKid
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
Oh yeah, you know it. Just me and Moses here, burnin' that bush...
~ThatWiccanKid
I'll take that is a confirmation of my original post. As the scripture I cited says, the Bible tells us:

1) We have dominion over all of the Earth

2) When animals we own hurt or even "push" people, they must die

3) If we allow animals we own to hurt or even "push" people, we must die

4) While beating the animal to death with a stone is the main manner listed in the Bible for this, God also demonstrated that when he is upset with Man, he drowned every living thing slowly,

My only question was, which way should I use.

Now if you have a problem with ANY of that, please cite the Scripture that shows that I have misread any of this.


Thank you and go in Peace!


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:05 AM

PS: For a discussion of WHY God chose stoning, please see this document:

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=58411


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:11 AM

I have a Grimoire, which is my Bible, that I wrote. My book, written in the last year, not the last 3,000 years or whatever, states that "All living creatures are to be treated equally, regardless of any differences."
After all, we are all "God's" creations, are we not?
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I have a Grimoire, which is my Bible, that I wrote. My book, written in the last year, not the last 3,000 years or whatever, states that "All living creatures are to be treated equally, regardless of any differences."
After all, we are all "God's" creations, are we not?
Oh yes. We are all God's creation, and all are equal. Every animal is equal to us, and killing one would be immoral. As such, I assume you never wash your blankets, sheets, pillowcases or clothing, And never vacuum your carpet or wash your rugs. Otherwise you would be responsible for the deaths of thousands of dust mites, animals with as much right to exist as you, right?

Ditz.


Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I have a Grimoire, which is my Bible, that I wrote. My book, written in the last year, not the last 3,000 years or whatever, states that "All living creatures are to be treated equally, regardless of any differences."
After all, we are all "God's" creations, are we not?
So you have not come here to discuss Christianity as is stated in our site? Why should I not ban you right now?

PS: "All living creatures are to be treated equally, regardless of any differences?" Wow. Only a book written by Satan himself would suggest that we treat three-year-old girls the same as a mass-murder, pedophile. You disgust me.


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:44 AM

Lmao, I'm only 16, I'm too lazy to wash or clean anything :]
As for the gent with the glasses, ever heard of Tabula Rasa? Oh wait, you're narrow-minded, so you'll have to Google that one
Nevertheless, I'm just here to have fun, maybe save a soul or two, I don't know...
~ThatWiccanKid
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Gabriel Reproba Gabriel Reproba is offline
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 03:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
Lmao, I'm only 16, I'm too lazy to wash or clean anything :]
As for the gent with the glasses, ever heard of Tabula Rasa? Oh wait, you're narrow-minded, so you'll have to Google that one
Nevertheless, I'm just here to have fun, maybe save a soul or two, I don't know...
~ThatWiccanKid
Last chance. Answer the question or be banned and stay unsaved and Hell-bound.


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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ThatGayKid ThatGayKid is offline
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Posts: 15
Join Date: Sep 2011
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ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 04:01 AM

I came to discuss it, and perhaps try to make some sense of all this. I expected to be banned by now, so that's up to you. As for me being a pedophile, I'm not of age to be considered such a harsh term. I have a 17 year old girlfriend. I'm white, she's Asian, that's illegal in your religion, isn't it?
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Gabriel Reproba Gabriel Reproba is offline
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Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 04:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatWiccanKid View Post
I came to discuss it, and perhaps try to make some sense of all this.
Then why are you not discussing it. I will ask you one more time:

I have cited multiple pieces of Scripture from the Holy King James Bible that instruct me to kill my misbehaving kittens and to do so via stoning or drowning.

You assert that this is wrong, so show me where, in the Holy Bible, it says anything taht contradicts the scripture I have posted.


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 04:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatGayKid View Post
I came to discuss it, and perhaps try to make some sense of all this. I expected to be banned by now, so that's up to you. As for me being a pedophile, I'm not of age to be considered such a harsh term. I have a 17 year old girlfriend. I'm white, she's Asian, that's illegal in your religion, isn't it?
Show me a man who thinks race-mixing is not an abomination unto God, and I'll show you a man who hasn't read Ezra 9-10.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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ThatGayKid ThatGayKid is offline
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ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.ThatGayKid is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 04:12 AM

I'm crying from laughter over here. You totally "hax0red" my account because you know I'm getting to you guys. Just admit it, you're all unhappy, narrow-minded, and gullible for living in your fantasy world. If we're all going to stop being mature here, then I think I've proved my point. You lose, I win. Have a nice life of slavery.
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Gabriel Reproba's Avatar
Gabriel Reproba Gabriel Reproba is offline
Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team
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Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Gabriel Reproba will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 04:15 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatGayKid View Post
I'm crying from laughter over here. You totally "hax0red" my account because you know I'm getting to you guys. Just admit it, you're all unhappy, narrow-minded, and gullible for living in your fantasy world. If we're all going to stop being mature here, then I think I've proved my point. You lose, I win. Have a nice life of slavery.
I give up. These 4chan kids come in... say something random, won't engage when asked to post a single citation supporting tehir claims, and then giggle like schoolgirls. Is this what passes for intelligent behavior among atheists?


Yours In Christ,

Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.
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Isaac Fisher's Avatar
Isaac Fisher Isaac Fisher is offline
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Smile Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 10:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatGayKid View Post
You lose, I win. Have a nice life of slavery.

You have yet to post anything you back up your claim. The only thing you have said is that you are a race-mixing, drug-using heathen and that you are so 'Leet' and 'cool'.


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Sister Kitty's Avatar
Sister Kitty Sister Kitty is offline
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Sister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureSister Kitty has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 10:36 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatGayKid View Post
As for the gent with the glasses, ever heard of Tabula Rasa?
Blank slate. Describes you perfectly. An idiot.


Exodus 22:20 He that sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the LORD only, he shall be utterly destroyed.
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Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

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Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: How Should I Kill My Kittens: Drowning Or Smash Their Heads In? - 09-17-2011, 01:25 PM

If it's not too late, I'll take the kittens off your hands. I have some more vivisection work to do on this project: http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=11665





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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