[Jim C. Lombardo]

As part of an humble effort to create Christian-appropriate music for Landover Baptist Church, I thought of this little ditty in time for the season.


Don't Let the Wiccans Get You

Have you every really thought when you step outside,
Gee I hope them witches don't take me for a ride,
and hoist me on their magic stick,
and subject me to an evil trick!

They'll leave you scarred with blackened burns,
and fill your bottom with rectal worms,
They'll steal your kids to grind and mince,
and do things that'd make Satan wince.

When you get bewitched and cursed with sin,
You don't survive, you are their victim!
So rally Christians left and right,
and show those witches what is God's might!

What is a witch, we shall look and see!
It could be a girl singing in your tree,
or the kindly old lady down the street,
(Secretly a Jew, cooking cats for meat)

Round them up, just to be safe,
Every hag, and nerd and gothic waif,
We'll tie them up in a big brown sack,
and drop them in a dump so they don't come back!